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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I LOVE my engagement ring - but worried it looks tacky?

290 replies

princesspollysmum · 31/05/2022 20:23

My (for now) BF let me pick my engagement ring. Would’ve spent up to £100 on it but I knew he wasn’t having the best time financially and we have other priorities (our 1 year old, a house, car payments etc). I follow a company on Instagram and the rings she has are all cubic zirconia and sterling silver for £40-£60. Mine was in the £40 range but is BEAUTIFUL. Her rings don’t rust or turn fingers green and are really sparkly. It’s much bigger in person than the pictures made it look which is my concern … don’t want to look like a wannabe WAG (my boyfriend dies football and worried his group might say something! Or the girlfriends from the group!)

Be honest with me - if you saw this on a lady would you think it looked cheap, tacky? What would your thoughts be. And don’t say it shouldn’t matter! It doesn’t to me but want to prepare myself for what others might say to me! I love him and don’t care how much it costs.

I LOVE my engagement ring - but worried it looks tacky?
OP posts:
PegasusReturns · 01/06/2022 06:48

It wouldn’t be for me and people will know it’s not a diamond. Provided that doesn’t bother you then it’s fine

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 01/06/2022 06:51

I"d be more worried about hanging around with a bunch of WAGs and worrying about their opinions. Ring looks great.

icelollycraving · 01/06/2022 06:56

I think it’s a lovely ring. If it’s on your ring finger, it’s a lovely engagement ring. I’d think your fiancée had saved hard, wouldn’t really occur that it wasn’t real diamonds.
I love how refreshing the replies are. Getting engaged is about commitment and love, not about money. You’ve found a ring you love from a man you love, congratulations!

Pennyhill22 · 01/06/2022 06:57

I would know it's not real. A diamond like that would cost thousands. If you like it then thats all that matters. Please just be honest about the price though if anybody asks otherwise you will look silly.

Suzi888 · 01/06/2022 06:58

Zippidy123 · 31/05/2022 20:29

It's beautiful but I think the size of the stone gives away the fact that it's not a diamond which absolutely doesn't matter but if you want people to think it is then I'd go for something smaller.

^ This
or QVC Diamonique.

Metabigot · 01/06/2022 07:02

Just be aware that Stirling silver will probably not be a very durable metal.

I found the perfect ring in a shop on my anniversary which was only £17, amethyst stone set in silver . Its like a second engagement ring!

But after 3 years the metal went distorted and out of shape so I had it re set in white gold at £300 for 9 carat. I wanted 18 carat but that was £600.

So you may need to get it reset in something more durable if you want to wear it forever.

SamMil · 01/06/2022 07:07

It looks lovely, congratulations!!

Billandben444 · 01/06/2022 07:09

It's a beautiful ring and will look lovely. My only concern would be how it would stand up to years and years of wear as costume jewellery is usually not that robust. I know that you want something that sparkles but I would question the quality tbh. How would you feel about going round the antique shops with BF and seeing if you can find something there that fits the bill? Anyway, I wouldn't worry about what your friends might think - I'm sure they'll just be delighted for you. Congratulations 🎊

Original poster
princesspollysmum · 01/06/2022 07:13

So, as many have asked - here it is on my finger … he hasn’t proposed yet (even though I’ve picked the ring already!) he wants at least one element to be a surprise. So sneaked a quick pic after the gym! 😅 I don’t have tiny hands but they aren’t huge so think it looks okay?

I LOVE my engagement ring - but worried it looks tacky?
OP posts:
BooksAndHooks · 01/06/2022 07:14

I don’t think it matters what other people think of the style / size of ring.

My only concern with this sort of ring is it is something meant to be worn every day for the rest of your life. Durability would be my priority and I would probably pick something second hand and/ or a lot simpler but made to last.

Also consider your wedding band and how it will fit alongside it, my only regret with my rings is that I didn’t consider my wedding band and they don’t sit flush, it also means I struggle with my eternity ring as the gap looks odd between the rings.

Wedding and engagement rings need to be the same material as they will rub against each other. Even wearing 9ct and 18ct gold together can cause problems as 9ct is harder and will wear 18ct. I would worry about silver being quite soft to last for everyday wear for the rest of your life.

Original poster
princesspollysmum · 01/06/2022 07:19

Thank you! I have posted a picture x

OP posts:
Badqueen · 01/06/2022 07:21

It was de beers who decided that engagement rings should be diamonds, and a few very successful ad campaigns later and people seem to think it's the only choice. I think if you love it, wear it. There's no need to pretend it's a diamond. Other options do exist other than diamonds and they're just as suitable for engagement rings as diamonds are.

Badqueen · 01/06/2022 07:21

It looks lovely on your hand. Suits you perfectly.

MoodyTwo · 01/06/2022 07:34

It looks beautiful on your hand !

VillanellesCoat · 01/06/2022 07:40

It really suits you! My short stubby fingers wouldn’t take it sadly, but I think it looks rather elegant on yours. Congratulations! x

WingBingo · 01/06/2022 07:40

Looks lovely on!

Rosehugger · 01/06/2022 07:46

Looks lovely on your hand. You could be a hand model!

SundayTeatime · 01/06/2022 07:51

Rosehugger · 01/06/2022 07:46

Looks lovely on your hand. You could be a hand model!

Yes, you have lovely hands. Anything would look good!

coconuthead · 01/06/2022 08:03

It looks lovely, but as pp said I would assume it's costume jewellery because if it was a diamond it would be extremely expensive! Also a CZ and silver ring won't last long. That's why people tend to go with stronger stones and more durable metals like gold or platinum.

Scoobyblue · 01/06/2022 08:15

i love it. Congratulations

itsnice · 01/06/2022 08:16

It's beautiful

Drame · 01/06/2022 08:16

Looks lovely OP. Agree with other that is will be clear that it is not a real diamond so only a problem if that matters to you. My friend has a non-diamond engagement ring and got fed up of people looking at the ring and saying ‘wow, that is a huge diamond’ and her having to explain that it wasn’t real.

WowIlikereallyhateyou · 01/06/2022 08:19

Its your ring, up to you. Obviously, not diamond for many reasons. Personally, i would go for a more durable precious metal, with smaller precious stone. It wont be catching on things then.

BellePeppa · 01/06/2022 08:29

Ilkleymoor · 31/05/2022 20:52

I respect people more who get cubic zirconia rather blood diamonds, so wear yours with pride.

Me too! I sold all my jewellery when I became single and would never have a real, mined diamond again.

The ring looks lovely on your finger.

SleepSleepRaveAsleep · 01/06/2022 08:30

Ring is fine and honestly it doesn't matter as long as YOU like it (I'm know you didn't want to hear that but it's true). People will know it's not a real diamond but that doesn't matter. My only concern would be that it won't be durable, it's never going to last long term given the material it's made of. I wished I'd got a platinum ring as even one several grand and 18carat it still needs replating (I remove it to shower/clean/the beach etc) but it still needs it about every 4 years.