To think DH will look like an idiot

[Waistcoatworrier]

NC as my user name is outing

My best friend is getting married in a couple of months and I’m chief bridesmaid. DH is attending as a guest. Bride is in ivory, I’m in dusky pink/mauve and the other bridesmaids in a burgundy/maroon colour.

DH always tries too hard to fit in, Says he likes things other people like if he thinks it will make him sound ‘cool’ etc.

He has decided he wants to wear Mens Vest and Tie Set Waistocat Necktie with Pocket Square Cufflinks smile.amazon.co.uk/dp/B08L7XFJZ1/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_F94V0GP535KABDKPZJHQ?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1 this waistcoat. I’ve said it’s something someone in a bridal party would wear. He says he likes it and wants to wear a waistcoat, I’ve said he’ll look ridiculous and should get a normal waistcoat to match/complement his suit. Who is BU?

AIBU - The waistcoat is suitable for a wedding guest
AINBU - The waistcoat will make him look like he’s trying to be part of the bridal party

I think you 'nudging him' towards a tie that matches your dress will make him look like he's trying to be in thr bridal party tbh

I’ve been to a few weddings recently and most men were wearing waist coats - one man even had a top hat and one of those walking sticks (the actual word has evaded me). I think your DH will look amazing - the colour and pattern is stunning teamed with a more low key colour like grey. I honestly don’t see why men outside of the bridal party can’t wear this.

Also, are you happy for him to tell you what you can and cannot wear? Slippery slope.

I like the concept of the waistcoat but it's a bit shiny & bright! It scream quality st sweet to me sorry OP dh

Is there another colour/material he could wear.

Yeah you might be right, I’m just trying to find a solution that isn’t a ‘bridal party waistcoat’, but will still make him feel good about what he’s wearing. Any ideas?

For what it’s worth I agree with you, it’s one of those sort of unspoken things- I would expect to see that on a best man, not a guest. Something which looks good with a his suit, like linen or a nice contrasting (non shiny) colour and a tie which goes, but doesn’t match, would be much better. HOWEVER don’t let it ruin your or his day. Make your point, then leave it. Take a different tie in your car/ bag so he can take the waistcoat off and change the tie. It’s his choice at the end of the day and he will have to make the decision himself.

I actually think it's fine? Doesn't sound like he'll look like part of the bridal party to me. Also doesn't sound like you like your husband very much.

Again, I’m not telling him not to wear it. He would hate to think he looked ‘weird’.

If the general consensus is that it’s fine I’m happy to be proved wrong.

I’d also be happy to be told my attire wasn’t appropriate before the event, rather than getting there and looking ridiculous.

actually think it's fine? Doesn't sound like he'll look like part of the bridal party to me. Also doesn't sound like you like your husband very much.

Contempt isn't really a good foundation for happy marriage.

🙄

Here they come 😂

How about
Maroon (Debenhams)
Pink check (Next)
Dusky pink (Joe Brown)

I agree with you.
If he really wants to wear a waist coat he needs to choose a colour which does not scream “LOOK AT ME” because it’s NOT his wedding.

Oh god, no, that waistcoat is hideous. Looks really cheap and nasty and like he wants to be part of the wedding party. I would not be seen dead with him if he insists on wearing this.
I don’t say this often, but I’m afraid it’s a LTB from me. 🙈

Ooh, links went funny

Joe Brown pink

Next pink check

😂

You in dusky pink and the rest of the bridesmaids in burgundy would be more of an issue for me. I’d be concerned people would think I’m pretending to be a bridesmaid as I’d look so out of place in the photos, they are colours that in no way compliment each other.

Oh FFS! New link button is clearly useless!

This. Attention seeking.

I think it looks awesome. I love the colour, but in your DH's shoes I would want to make sure it paired well with my suit.

The colours aren't trying to match yours, or the other bridesmaids, so unless all the groomsmen are wearing purple, he won't look like he's trying to match. He will look very formal, like he's made a real effort, and will probably get lots of aunties etc cooing over him (he certainly would in my family!) If he doesn't want to stand out (in a good way) then it might not be for him, but otherwise I think he should go for it.

I’ve not explained the colours very well, they are the same tone. Also, that one’s the brides choice

You haven't exactly been nice about him so far, I can see where WeddingFavour is coming from.

I really don't see an issue - it looks absolutely fine to me?

Me too- I think it looks lovely

I think wearing what he wants without someone nitpicking might make him feel good about what he is wearing

Dickhead is the word that you are looking for