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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you were the weird girl in school

210 replies

likemindedarseholes · 17/04/2022 18:50

Do you still feel like the weird one?
I think I will always feel different. I don't dislike the feeling.
I go between thinking that perhaps everyone is weird in their own ways and feeling that maybe a lot of people enjoy things that I don't. I don't feel any superiority that I don't enjoy mainstream music or normal clothes. It's just different preferences.
I worry sometimes that my kids will not be weird. And that I won't be able to relate their childhood or teenage experience. That's all

OP posts:
StScholastica · 17/04/2022 23:08

I was definitely different.
Had lots of friends at school but was very much the Tom boy. My hobbies were shooting, competitive motorbike scrambling and BMX.

maddy68 · 17/04/2022 23:11

I was a definite weirdo. I was a nerd , top of the class completely uncool. Untrendy BUT was fairly funny

That had carried me through life

mrsdiddlydoo · 17/04/2022 23:13

🙋🏻‍♀️ I was weird. Still am different. In the last 12 months I've come to realise I'm just neuro diverse and probably autistic and or have ADHD. Still navigating this realisation and trying to figure out how to move forwards.

Eightiesfan · 17/04/2022 23:13

@Opaljewel

Yes I was. Turns out I have ADHD and wondered why I always felt differently and the odd one out. Luckily I have several friends who accept me as I am these days.
Yes, me too. Was not diagnosed until I was a adult but suddenly a lot of my odd behaviours made sense. My DS2 has ASD with a side of ADHD, he reminds me so much of myself it’s scary. He also marches to the beat of his own drum.
mrsdiddlydoo · 17/04/2022 23:14

Accidental emojis

JulesRimetStillGleaming · 17/04/2022 23:16

I was the weird kid. Diagnosed with autism at 40.

MmeMeursault · 17/04/2022 23:17

Yep and am autistic and have ADHD
V academic, into languages and maths, went onto study law.
Just wish I'd known at the time; would have saved a lot of heartache trying to 'fit in'

Nat6999 · 18/04/2022 02:10

Yes, the kid with no friends who stuck out like a sore thumb. I couldn't cope with kids my own age, the few friends I had were two years younger than me. I was diagnosed with Autism a couple of years ago, it explained a lot.

Nat6999 · 18/04/2022 02:11

I was badly bullied as well, it still affects me now at 56.

PlayingGrownUp · 18/04/2022 02:19

I was the strange one at school then joined a society at university where I was looked down on for being too normal!

Now me and my husband are a strange medium: he seems more mainstream: footie fan etc but the man has a huge comic collection! Whereas I supposedly come across as quite ‘geeky’ but have a new interest in fashion and style in general.

Toddlerteaplease · 18/04/2022 03:07

Yes. Still the odd one out. Have no shared interests with any friends my age. And get on much better with much older people. Would love to have more friends my own age
.

MrsTerryPratchett · 18/04/2022 03:16

[quote likemindedarseholes]@DiscoStusMoonboots same, black metal, poetry reading ex- goth here. Still wearing all black and listening to Sonic Youth in my kitchen on a hot day. [/quote]
I met Mark Ibold a few times. I can tell you Sonic Youth were both weird and utterly lovely. Well, Mark was. Really lovely bloke. Revel in your weird.

My DD is also weird and loves it.

Snugglepumpkin · 18/04/2022 03:54

I was voted "Girl most likely to become a mercenary" at school.

Does that count?

DinosaurDuvet · 18/04/2022 04:34

Yes, always very quiet, shy & introverted at school. By late teens I started to come out of myself more a bit more. People who have just met me refer to me as “quirky” - I don’t think I am, just more shy 🫣

DropYourSword · 18/04/2022 04:44

Yes I was the weird one in school.
Still feel like I don't quite fit in now.

My DS is going through assessments at the moment. I'm realising that if I was a child during this time, I would be being assessed too! Maybe I never fitted in because I was literally wired differently.

groovergirl · 18/04/2022 04:50

Still don't like wearing jeans Grin Ha, me too, @MargaretThursday, and I was a teen in the '80s when jeans were the uniform when you weren't in school uniform. If a classmate saw you not wearing jeans at the weekend they'd give you hell on Monday. It was hard to find the '60s Mod and ballet-core clothes I liked so I made my own or repurposed my DM's hoard.
Still love tights, leggings and short skirts, still hate anything that restricts my legs and still get called weird for not owning, let alone wearing, jeans. Fine by me!

doggyweewee · 18/04/2022 05:00

@AchillesPoirot

Yes. Am 99.9% certain I’m autistic.
This.

I was definitely the weird one. I do however now have insight, which I previously lacked.

My DS is cool though, no idea how and what to do with that Confused

mustlovegin · 18/04/2022 07:25

I worry sometimes that my kids will not be weird

Why do you think your kids will not be 'weird' also OP?

Maybebabyno2 · 18/04/2022 07:25

I was a weird kid and I'm a weird adult. I love it!

My ds is showing that he is pretty much a replica of me personality wise so I think he is going to be a bit odd too.

Original poster
likemindedarseholes · 18/04/2022 07:29

@MrsTerryPratchett that's awesome! I love them

OP posts:
Maybebabyno2 · 18/04/2022 07:31

@maddy68

I was a definite weirdo. I was a nerd , top of the class completely uncool. Untrendy BUT was fairly funny

That had carried me through life

This is me! Weird but entertaining.

I'm sure being funny saved me from being bullied, I was the fat kid who liked different stuff to the kids my age. Because I could make then laugh, I had a great group of friends and the popular kids never sought me out as a target. And I would have been a very easy target.

ShowOfHands · 18/04/2022 07:43

I'm not entirely sure that weird is a useful term here as everybody is using it very differently.

Happily, I work in dd's secondary school and she's like me - v bright, marches to the beat of her own drum - and so do all her friends. The more I talk to my peers and the more I work with dd's, I recognise that feeling out of step, feeling like you don't fit in, struggling with self doubt etc is actually the norm. It seems an almost universal adolescent experience in fact. The media, predominantly, tells them what they should like and very successfully too, but scratch beneath the surface and none of them fit that mould. We do seem better at embracing difference nowadays, ironically to the extent that being a goth or emo or LGBT etc is almost a badge of honour in some respects. However, I see a lot of pride in individual interests, fashion and choices in adolescents today. It's increasingly becoming the norm and hurrah for that.

Neurodiversity, particularly undiagnosed or masked, is an entirely different kettle of fish and definitely doesn't benefit from the label "weird".

Hadenoughofthisbullshit · 18/04/2022 07:57

True @ShowOfHands but many of us were called weird frequently at school.

sobby49 · 18/04/2022 08:22

No, I was very popular.

MotherWol · 18/04/2022 08:24

Yes; my family moved house at the start of secondary school and I went from an academic outer London school to a school in special measures in a rural community. I was different to my classmates in terms of interests, socioeconomic background and ambitions, and I stuck out like a sore thumb. I was bullied pretty badly and spent most of school alone. Transferred to a sixth form college in the city for A-levels, made friends, and moved back to London for uni. Have been broadly okay since.

DC’s current primary is much more diverse, but if we were to move in the future I’d be keen to find somewhere broadly similar in terms of background and class. It’s also made me very aware of bullying and I really hope DC don’t go through what I did. DD1 is very social and seems to make friends easily which is a relief!