Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Original poster

My toddler is friendlier then others and it annoys me when others are not

216 replies

Lozzak21 · 15/04/2022 20:27

My ds has just turned 2 and is always full of smiles going up to other kids saying 'hi I'm xx' and trying to interact with toys and games etc at play groups or the park and I just feel like like other kids his age aren't as friendly as him and it's sometimes not very reciprocal. He is a such a sweet little boy and there would be no obvious reason why other kids aren't as friendly back.
He's about to start pre school so just hoping his joyful, happy, confident little self is embraced there.
Anyone else felt this way? Or is it normal at this age for other kids to be a bit 'off' with kids they don't know.

OP posts:

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 16/04/2022 13:38

It may be worth saying I also have DC with disabilities,one of them wasn't able to communicate with other DC until she was nearly a teenager. I still understood people (especially back then, she's older now) weren't as aware of DC with SN and just assumed she was a bit of a madam ignoring them. So I do understand that viewpoint, but still...

(I actually cleared out my attic the other day and found something I had forgotten about - when she did start to communicate, I had written down the words she started to say and the phonetic version of the syllables of what she had actually said). I had actually framed it She'd kill me if she saw that now

earlier I heard her telling her sister to fuck off for not bringing her fucking phone charger to her, it was quite clear what she was saying

MyCatIsAJerk · 16/04/2022 15:21

@Luredbyapomegranate

Thank you. We could surely write a six-volume series of all the mischief we’ve been in, as well, and lived to tell the tale.
I love that little girl in the blue dress with the smocking and the white Peter Pan collar. I can see that as if it were this morning.

Original poster

Lozzak21 · 16/04/2022 17:18

@WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles thank you so much for sharing. Definitely cheered me up and made me feel a little bit less deflated/embarrassed!

OP posts:

Lunalae · 16/04/2022 18:17

@Lozzak21

My ds has just turned 2 and is always full of smiles going up to other kids saying 'hi I'm xx' and trying to interact with toys and games etc at play groups or the park and I just feel like like other kids his age aren't as friendly as him and it's sometimes not very reciprocal. He is a such a sweet little boy and there would be no obvious reason why other kids aren't as friendly back. He's about to start pre school so just hoping his joyful, happy, confident little self is embraced there. Anyone else felt this way? Or is it normal at this age for other kids to be a bit 'off' with kids they don't know.

You sound pretty insufferable, is this a reverse?

Plenty of kids don't want to interact with total strangers at the park. They're there to play with siblings and their own friends they arrived with.

My two like to play with each other, or other quiet, shyer children. Honestly the bold ones who loudly announce their royal arrival are usually bossy little so and sos.

vivkensington · 16/04/2022 19:01

Pretty bad form to go around judging other children!
Maybe your child is extra social but judging others and not grasping that all people are different is not something you want them to develop. Maybe teach your son that other children have different skills/strengths/interests and they don't all have to conform to your idea of what a perfect child looks like.

Newuser82 · 16/04/2022 21:30

@Cheesechips

Also an over friendly child means I have to make awkward shallow small talk with the parent which I can't be bothered with

I have two overly friendly kids who love to talk to everyone. I very frequently have to swiftly usher them away saying such things as "shut up and keep walking" so as to avoid making small talk with people I don't know 🙈

melcalfe · 17/04/2022 07:03

[quote Giraffesandbottoms]@FloraPostePosts

Of course my child isn’t as important to a stranger - but if I said good morning to a stranger I would also think it’s pretty rude if they ignored me. Children are people too. It’s nothing to do with finding children adorable etc and just basic manners. No matter what I’ve gone through I’ve been able to remember to say please and thank you etc and reply when someone is talking to me.[/quote]
Sorry but Flora was spot on. Not every adult likes children or wants to (...or has to) engage in kiddy talk.

A polite half-smile - yes okay. But as OP mentioned your child is nowhere near as important or interesting to strangers.

Beckstar0 · 17/04/2022 08:05

My granddaughter is very shy and would run away from your boy, she might also cry at him.
But - she’s absolutely bloody perfect so it must be you who is unreasonable 😁

Beckstar0 · 17/04/2022 08:06

@Organictangerine

Reminds me of About A Boy ‘Wow, that’s amazing for a 2 year old’ 😆

😂😂😂 I had flashbacks to that too 😂

Ahgoonyegirlye · 17/04/2022 08:11

Well, this is awkward. You appear to think you have the best DS in the world, much more advanced etc but I happen to know that my DC are the best kids in the world.
So you must be mistaken.

Hdocheub820 · 17/04/2022 08:39

@JustLyra
I'm glad you said that as my 2.5 year old was the sweetest thing and for the last few months has been going through a don't look at me, no, I'm not where phase 😭 (mainly at family members!) hoping it ends soon.

CelestiaNoctis · 17/04/2022 09:06

No I have the same thing. My 6 year old goes up to children and they ignore her. And she's the only child in the playground actually making any noise and laughing. All the other children are very quiet or not reacting. It's really weird! I don't think my daughters is that special at all, just something I've noticed too.

JustLyra · 17/04/2022 09:10

[quote Hdocheub820]@JustLyra
I'm glad you said that as my 2.5 year old was the sweetest thing and for the last few months has been going through a don't look at me, no, I'm not where phase 😭 (mainly at family members!) hoping it ends soon.[/quote]
It’ll pass.

I’ve got 6 and they’ve all had phases of going from sweetness and like to absolute horrors (including one who went from the most sweet child to the nursery biter and back again in a rollercoaster three months!) and back again.

It’ll pass!

motherofthelittlescreamingone · 17/04/2022 10:49

I sort of understand your point. I have a very sociable now 4 year old who has always been a very sociable little person and would have been the same at that age (my 1 year old has a different temperament, not good or bad, but different).

The flip side of this is that my 4 year old used to get confused and keep pressing if others were less friendly and needed to really work on giving others space to warm up - being too friendly/persistent when others are wary/shy is actually a lack of social skills/empathy in its own way.

All kids have work to do socially and all have strengths and weaknesses.

Dreambigger · 17/04/2022 11:00

Don't worry there will be lots of opportunities at pre school to make friends and he sounds lovely. But kids can go back and forth in phases....and it may be that he isn't socially aware yet so doesn't know to feel ' shy' so could become more self conscious and less 'confident' and this is ok too and normal development .

EllaVaNight · 17/04/2022 18:46

Cannot roll my eyes hard enough at this Im sure you can if you try.

My “respect the boundaries” comment was aimed at the OP, not at the toddlers who have no idea But you were talking about toddlers. Wouldn't you think it was sad if every time another child approached yours, their parent stopped them from interacting before any interaction took place? I wouldn't want to live somewhere like that!

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9