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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How do you imagine the average Mumsnetter to be?

300 replies

mycatisannoying · 30/03/2022 17:17

  • Sensible
  • Sensible clothing
  • Frugal with money
  • Disapproving of trivialities, such as spending too much on Christmas presents or cosmetics
  • Assertive
  • Will say 'no' for the sake of it sometimes
  • Uncompromising
  • Very high expectations in relationships
  • Intelligent

Any others?

OP posts:
Tabasco007 · 02/04/2022 23:31

51, single, no kids!

ColtBolt · 02/04/2022 23:36

Happy, witty, hopeful, helpful. Grumpy, obtuse, despondent, terse.

Gloriously human, therefore flawed.

Likes wine or not.

Wears clothes, mostly.

Has an email address. Can type and has access to the internet. Can read.

aspargusaubergine · 03/04/2022 08:15

Drives a battered Volvo because her “old money close friend” does.
Oily hair (washes once every two weeks)
Asda clothes (again just like her aristocratic imaginary friend)

mnnewbie111 · 03/04/2022 08:23

Can't say or I'll get kicked off 😂

TolkiensFallow · 03/04/2022 08:25

Does not put the washing out at night!

5128gap · 03/04/2022 09:18

Vaguely dissatisfied with her current life, but would never admit it. Manifests as youth fetish.
Believes all women under 22 are beautiful, gleamy and glowy, with perfect figures, and all women over 30 are invisible. Gets very upset with other women who step outside of the stereotype, resulting in scathing criticism of their looks and lifestyle.
Believes her 15 year old DD to have the last word on style.
Struggling with aging due to youth fetish.
Believes her tame nights out in the student bar, and 3am chat with a 19 year old communist who smoked weed at the weekend were her glory days.

Exaggerates the achievements, earning power and compliant nature of Dave, her quiet, disinterested and rather dull middle manager DH. Considers herself superior to less empowered women because Dave unloads the dishwasher and cooks tea on a Friday.

Ladybug9 · 03/04/2022 09:46

I think there's two types! One, dark shoulder length hair, dark eyes and glasses, hair all one length and shoulder length, pale-ish skin, wears makeup, well off but loves a handout from inlaws that they moan about shamelessly, children have tutors but are thick as mince and nothing will save them so lots of shouting, crying and rage during examination periods, think any bad day with anyone is a mental health concern, lacks emotional intelligence, was the other woman at one point but thinks their own circumstances made it okay at the time and cannot cobble together the emotional intelligence to understand why not, has girl mates and socialises with them like a teenager with too much free time, husband is their secretary, maid and has no opinion of his own, children are actually quite nice kids but look knackered from all the trips to Orlando along with extra curricular activities, pretends to be a well rounded person who let's their kids have independence but really it suits them because it means more time for themselves, spends down time on Mumsnet, at the gym and telling off other women at work.

Second type, kind, witty, empathetic and stops by on heart-rending threads to offer support and bump even with nothing to say, on Mumsnet for solidarity and sisterhood, loves their own family and includes their partners family in that, understands that not everyone loves theirs, good friend, good listener, their pets are a part of their household, money is there to help them live, genuinely in love with their partner despite the odd row, has a home they don't think is anything special but real life friends love to go to on a Saturday night with the smell of dinner cooking and a bottle of any wine in tow, keeps sentimental objects, likes their older children's partners, doesn't hate their kids teachers and sweats the big stuff in life only

Ladybug9 · 03/04/2022 09:53

@thatsgotit

In her 30s or 40s. Earns £40k+ and would never dream of not working full time. Has a degree. Middle class through and through, even if she didn't start out that way. Lives in the Home Counties and has possibly never been to 'the North'. If not from 'the North', thinks of 'the North' as one big amorphous mass with no culture. If from 'the North', is very proud of the fact that she 'got away'. Classic baggy, shapeless- clothes only, and definitely no high heels, piercings or tattoos, 'unless you want to look ridiculous, in which case crack on OP.' Extrovert. Introverts are just doing it for the attention. Married, and if her marriage were to end, wouldn't date again until the DC were at least 35. Second wives/partners have no rights and basically shouldn't exist. Baffled by the notion that adults would want their birthdays marked in some way. What are they, 12? Partner does at least 50% of the chores otherwise (ideally most of them) otherwise she'd LTB immediately. Owns a dog. Dog must be allowed everywhere at all times. All walls painted with Farrow & Ball. Has only ever had sex in a loving committed heterosexual vanilla relationship, casual/no-strings/kinky/FWB sex being 'grim' and a sign of having no self-respect. Cooks everything from scratch and 'can't think of anyone she knows who doesn't.' Size 12 at the most. If size 12, probably thinks she's fat. Ten thousand steps is a minimum, in fact there's really no excuse for not doing a 10k before breakfast. Judgey about alcohol consumption. Blocks friends if they happen to look at her the wrong way. Scared of germs and bodily fluids. Puts knickers straight back on after sex.
This is sooo spot on lol
NotTheWomanIWas · 03/04/2022 10:09

@mnnewbie111

Can't say or I'll get kicked off 😂
Go on, you know you want to
Mycatsgoldtooth · 03/04/2022 10:29

Well someone got me spot on Blush.
I don’t actually think of an average mumsnetter, the reason I love this site is I feel like it’s given me a window in to lives off people from all walks of life and let me across their wisdom. I suppose I think there are two types, the struggling SEN mum and the judgemental high flyer I picture if pushed.

skippy67 · 03/04/2022 10:50

White. Met her husband at university. Has one more dc than originally planned. Husband is a high earner. Works 4 hours a week to keep work/ life balance. Doesn't drive. Loves a salad, and never orders takeaways. Doesn't watch live TV. Hates their in-laws. Likes Joules, White Stuff and Fatface. Holidays in the UK and is " genuinely perplexed" that people would chose to go abroad. Votes Tory. Would not be bothered if they never had sex again. Has never been to London and doesn't want to.
Oh, and has an incontinent cat.

axolotlfloof · 03/04/2022 11:25

@TotallyTS

Hates weddings/hen dos/baby showers

Never drinks more than 2 gin and tonics and is very anti drugs

Her husband has a 'hobby'

I don't recognise many of these descriptions, but this one is TOTALLY me!
chattycaterpillar · 06/04/2022 20:18

Has two children, conceived when she was age. 32 and 34. She thinks anybody who has kids under 30 is feral, and anybody who has kids over 40 is far too old and going to be knackered and menopausal throughout all of the early years. Disgusted at younger/ older Mum's.

Is far too important to make friends with people, "who probably had nothing in common with, just had a baby at the same time," in antenatal groups, baby groups, school gate. Thinks baby groups and school gate mum's in particular are the work of the devil.

Spends a lot of time thinking about JK Rowling and the threat of transwomen in toilets.

Doesn't allow her kids to have Whatsapp/ Snapchat/ Instagram / Facebook until 16, despite them being the only kids in the class not to have it.

Hates getting invited to weddings, engagement parties, christennings, bat mitzvah's, birthdays or any other social function.

SwanBuster · 06/04/2022 20:23

@mycatisannoying

- Sensible
  • Sensible clothing
  • Frugal with money
  • Disapproving of trivialities, such as spending too much on Christmas presents or cosmetics
  • Assertive
  • Will say 'no' for the sake of it sometimes
  • Uncompromising
  • Very high expectations in relationships
  • Intelligent

Any others?

Good list. Just one amendment - remove pretty much everything other than :

‘Very high expectations in relationships’.

And it’s spot on 👍

Newyearnewme2022 · 06/04/2022 20:33

White
Either underweight or plump
Growing out the grey and has a ‘sharp bob’
No make up, no Botox, no fillers, short, clean nails with no varnish
Dresses their daughters in boys clothes
Either hates dogs or loves them
Wears dungarees and DM’s
Hates her mother in law and isn’t keen on her own mother either
Doesn’t think that her DH would ever cheat
Wangs on about the environment, plastic tat and landfill a lot
Refuses to turn the heating up unless it’s below freezing outside and then only for an hour in the morning and evening
Holidays at Centre Parks
Has tall, skinny sporty children who do activities 7 days a week

sweatervest · 06/04/2022 20:38

has a husband (who she probably calls hubby) who wears red jeans
has a big island in her kitchen
has children at boarding school
is still in touch with people she was at school with
has an annual lunch with her godmother somewhere posh and they always fight over who's going to pay

never has greasy hair, gets pissed or smokes
doesn't really swear other than to say "blast"

1ittlegreen · 06/04/2022 20:42

Refers to DH as 'hubster' on socials and goes on 'holibobs'.

ColouringPencils · 06/04/2022 20:45

To me she looks a bit like Kate Middleton, in her mid-40s. Privately educated but considers herself a lefty. Is in bits about where DC will go to secondary school (but we all know it won't be the failing comp). Considers it just good manners to be well put together. Reduces, reuses and recycles. Drives an old banger. Drinks Aldi wine. Holidays in France, Cornwall or the Lake District. DC are top of the class. Does a well paid, interesting job WFH three days a week. Goes to the gym and has a cleaner. Had a brief moment of being considered a bit wild in her 20s, but lost touch with those friends. Hasn't had sex in a while. More fragile than she appears.

NETSRIK · 06/04/2022 20:50

Children in private school

Shops at Boden

Doesn't let her hair down ever but has half a glass of wine at Christmas

Talks about her kids as if they're the first ever to take exams, take a driving test, breathe etc.

Wears sensible shoes

Has a cleaner, ironing lady, gardener etc. despite not working

Husband earns a fortune

Has lots of cars

Doesn't enjoy sex but permits it once a month.

Entitled

NETSRIK · 06/04/2022 20:54

@skippy67

White. Met her husband at university. Has one more dc than originally planned. Husband is a high earner. Works 4 hours a week to keep work/ life balance. Doesn't drive. Loves a salad, and never orders takeaways. Doesn't watch live TV. Hates their in-laws. Likes Joules, White Stuff and Fatface. Holidays in the UK and is " genuinely perplexed" that people would chose to go abroad. Votes Tory. Would not be bothered if they never had sex again. Has never been to London and doesn't want to. Oh, and has an incontinent cat.
I actually know this person! 😂😂😂😂😂
ABitDrunk · 06/04/2022 20:55

She drives a Little red corvette
She has Nine inch nails
She can reach Nirvana
She believes in staying for the long run
She's been to the West Coast
Sometimes she asks herself where is the love
She tells her DCs they can go their own way
Sometimes she's hungry like a wolf
She's always a woman
Her skin is a whiter shade of pale
She probably moves like Jagger
She never spends her time chasin' that neon rainbow
Her drink is Tennessee whiskey
She doesn't believe in levitating
She doesn't do any thinking out loud
She's probably been on a fantastic voyage
She has good times
She has a few diamonds and pearls
She will never tell you about her Achilles heel
She might be fuckin' perfect

AnastasiaRomanov · 06/04/2022 20:56

@ABitDrunk

She drives a Little red corvette She has Nine inch nails She can reach Nirvana She believes in staying for the long run She's been to the West Coast Sometimes she asks herself where is the love She tells her DCs they can go their own way Sometimes she's hungry like a wolf She's always a woman Her skin is a whiter shade of pale She probably moves like Jagger She never spends her time chasin' that neon rainbow Her drink is Tennessee whiskey She doesn't believe in levitating She doesn't do any thinking out loud She's probably been on a fantastic voyage She has good times She has a few diamonds and pearls She will never tell you about her Achilles heel She might be fuckin' perfect
Brilliant!
kyiv · 07/04/2022 09:09

Can never understand why someone has- not contacted the police/not complained/not spoken to the school/confronted/not said "no"/married the man/stayed in the relationship/stayed in the job/ even bothered to come on to Mumsnet with this! Why are they updating the thread instead of taking the action that specific mumsnetter imagines they would? It's very suspicious that they're updating the thread instead of doing all the things the mumsnetter has told them they must do.

Swayingpalmtrees · 07/04/2022 09:36

I imagine there are more men on here we think. It sometimes can be seen on certain threads.

latriciamcneal · 07/04/2022 10:58

straight laced
follows all government guidance without scrutiny
appeals to authority three times a day
well educated
trusts corporate press
loves pharmaceuticals
earns over 35K

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