How do you imagine the average Mumsnetter to be?

[mycatisannoying]

• Sensible
• Sensible clothing
• Frugal with money
• Disapproving of trivialities, such as spending too much on Christmas presents or cosmetics
• Assertive
• Will say 'no' for the sake of it sometimes
• Uncompromising
• Very high expectations in relationships
• Intelligent

Any others?

Cleaner
Pony lessons for the kids.
Professional job.
Couple of rental properties.

@Arsewangry

Amanda from motherland

I was literally about to write this

I'd say most Mums-netters and English

@StoneofDestiny

Have MIL problems Expect parents to child mind and stay close Obsessed with definitions of gender/sex Claim they only voted Boris Johnson as there was no alternative Live in homes where neighbours start car parking wars Needs to check out the views of strangers before dealing with simple problems Are incapable to saying 'no' and meaning it

Incapable of saying no is the opposite of how I see it!

@StoneofDestiny

Have MIL problems Expect parents to child mind and stay close Obsessed with definitions of gender/sex Claim they only voted Boris Johnson as there was no alternative Live in homes where neighbours start car parking wars Needs to check out the views of strangers before dealing with simple problems Are incapable to saying 'no' and meaning it

this.

Considers many things tacky or beneath her, despite claiming never to be judgey.

Has a DH with an "outing" hobby (cycling or golf)
No loo brush
No shoes on in house
Doesn't let tradesmen use the loo
Parking issues with neighbours daily
Has gorgeous DH who has a high powered job but still finds time to do 50% of the housework
Kids who are tall and sporty and do a range of activities and top of their classes.

I'm sure there are more

@mycatisannoying

Considers many things tacky or beneath her, despite claiming never to be judgey.

Yes!!

@tiddlywinks2

A penis cup on the bedside table? I'm very intrigued. Is this a MN prerequisite I'm not aware of?

I imagine her as 35, size 10, blonde, rich, has a nanny, a gardener and a cleaner and always looks immaculate from head to toe even though she drinks copious amounts of white wine.

[quote hobbledyhoy]@tiddlywinks2

A penis cup on the bedside table? I'm very intrigued. Is this a MN prerequisite I'm not aware of? [/quote]
I'm not sure how to link threads on here, but there's a post over in classics. It's brilliant

Lives in Surrey
Has a kitchen island
Has bi-folding doors
Member of the PTA
Pretends they don't vote Tory
Pretends they don't read the Daily Mail

Posts diagrams to clarify a problem that makes the issue more confusing

There's no such thing as the average MNer. The massively wide variety of people on here makes it a pretty pointless question.

Having said that, I fit all your descriptions OP

Prim
Uptight
Shops in sea salt
Gets her 'colours' done
Hates 'cool wives'

Doesn't like weddings and thinks hen dos/baby showers are tacky
Usually lives in an expensive house somewhere 'semi rural'
Doesn't seem to like regional accents, especially northern ones
Thinks all SAHM have made a terrible decision and the dh will leave them
Thinks that someone having a tattoo has instantly ruined their life and precious, pure skin

I know this is in jest......but these ones stand out to me!

@tunainatin

Female Mid 30s Dark shoulder length straight hair Slim Bretton top Skinny jeans Cool trainers On maternity leave from a professional job Nice car and healthy disposable income. I know that's rubbish but that's what comes to mind!

This is actually me 🤣

Low contact with her narcissist mum and and a love/hate relationship with her sister.
Drinks 6 times a year (tops)
Hasn’t had a full nights sleep in six years
Doesn’t always open the door
Tells her DH she doesn’t want a birthday/Christmas present then gets upset when she doesn’t get one.
Incapable of arranging her own birthday meal or party.

I'm not your average Mumsnetter going from the above but I do hate spelling mistakes and my hair is one length.

@NegativeNelly

I'm 26 Recently married No children Bet I've screwed all your expectations 😂

You’re just in training.

Big Victorian terrace (unless VERY RURAL, in which case I'm imagining a farm house tastefully renovated to the cost of several times my salary).

Children at Private School (which is referred to as "Independent" in the hope of it sounding less elitist).

Has dog who they love considerably more than their husband - and, contingent on recent behaviour, children.

Holidays in Cornwall as an indicator of frugality, studiously ignoring the fact that an all inclusive in Spain can often be cheaper.

Hates men, MILs and all her husband’s work colleagues. Eats a lot of smashed avocado. Shops at Boden. Has a part time job that she doesn’t really enjoy but ‘it gets her out of the house’. Gets unnecessarily hung up on the neighbour doing things to the boundary fence. Has children and a dog that shits in cupboards because she can’t be bothered to train it or rather ‘hasn’t got the time’. Husband hates dog. Wife hates husband. Drinks far too much prosecco.

Never reads the Daily Mail (whilst reading the Daily Mail)

Glad to not be the average mumsnetter if this is what they're like!

How did you guess arse??