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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Woman yelling at me because I wanted to avoid her dog

343 replies

Matleave2022 · 26/03/2022 12:33

I was walking along a reasonably narrow path with trees either side this morning and I had DS (4 months old) with me in a reclined buggy.

I spotted a couple (maybe in their late 50s or early 60s) coming towards me with an agressive looking breed of dog. I decided that I didn't want to take the risk, so without saying anything to them, I politely stopped in the path, stood in front of DS's buggy and waited for them to pass.

I want to stress that I said absolutely nothing to them as they were approaching. However, as they got close, the woman in the couple started yelling at me about how "My dog isn't going to eat your baby." "My dog is fine". "I think you are being overprotective".

My response was that I didn't know her from Adam, so why on earth would I trust a random stranger telling me that her dog was OK.

She continued to yell about me being overprotective and that me stopping in the path was "scaring" her dog. My only response was to tell her that she was being ridiculous to expect strangers to trust her assertions about her large dog, and I walked on once she had finally passed me.

I could have understood her reaction if I had said something like "keep your dog away from us" when I stopped, but I was silent and patiently waiting for her, her partner and the dog to pass.

It seems batshit that she got offended by me silently choosing to stop and not take the chance that her dog could go for the buggy. AIBU?

OP posts:

maddening · 07/04/2022 00:03

Doh I suspect the dog is more likely to bite and cause injury than a child

PixieLaLa · 07/04/2022 00:09

Anything running at something making an aggressive noise will probably illicit a defensive reaction

Totally agree. My point is on this thread the OP posted about a dog that wasn’t making aggressive noises or actions, was on a lead, not out of control etc however the OP made a judgment.

Ruralbliss · 07/04/2022 06:56

I did the same when my babies were small OP. Every time. Take no risks with big toothed unknown animals near my precious new cargo was my internal motto.

montysma1 · 07/04/2022 06:56

Escalated? Are you insane?

montysma1 · 07/04/2022 07:00

Don't be obtuse. You know exactly what she meant.

montysma1 · 07/04/2022 07:04

I can read dogs. I am not afaid of them. I used to work with them.
And if I am walking my dog and if certain breeds are in the park off lead, I leave the park.

froufroufrou · 07/04/2022 07:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Billandben444 · 07/04/2022 07:42

OP, I know you've gone but just in case you have another peek - you do what you think is right for your baby and ignore the negativity. Forget the shouty woman. You made a quick risk assessment and your actions were correct for you and your baby.

yellowsuninthesky · 07/04/2022 09:06

Out of interest would you also stand in front of your toddler if another child came running up towards them screeching

I would tell the child to go away. But kids don't generally run up and bite or jump up at kids randomly in parks. And certainly not to the extent that they could cause serious injury. But if they were hassling my child, I would pick him up and move away. It's easier to avoid an annoying small child than it is a dog, though.

maddening · 07/04/2022 20:48

@PixieLaLa

Anything running at something making an aggressive noise will probably illicit a defensive reaction

Totally agree. My point is on this thread the OP posted about a dog that wasn’t making aggressive noises or actions, was on a lead, not out of control etc however the OP made a judgment.

And? So what?, we are all entitled to make any judgement we like, the op did not say anything unpleasant, did not make any aggressive movements- she did nothing wrong in any way. Your point is absolutely pointless.

Jimbob11 · 10/04/2022 00:16

Once at the playground, a woman come up to my 2-year old with a pit bull. She said "oh, he's really sweet, he was raised with my own kids".

5 seconds later, when my daughter very carefully put her hand out to let the dog sniff her, the dog literally LUNGED at her, snarling, almost breaking the leash. I heard his teeth snap.

Every parent nearby started yelling at the lady - "get that dog away from here right now" There were toddlers everywhere.

The woman started crying and complaining that it wasn't her fault. We kept yelling at her until she walked away (barely controlling her now-frenzied snarling dog).

Lesson: the world is full of idiots.

Jimbob11 · 10/04/2022 00:20

Note: I work with a lot of dogs.

Pit bulls will change on a dime. Wonderful and sweet and then suddenly will attack children or other dogs with zero warning, with deadly accuracy.

Avoid them and never, ever listen to lying pit bull owners.

Newhousesad · 10/04/2022 03:30

She sounds batshit

Newhousesad · 10/04/2022 03:31

Was the dog cute at least?

ilovesooty · 10/04/2022 03:36

@froufroufrou

Ugh. Chavs. I am literally doggo obsessed but throw some serious side eye at owners of breeds such as pitbulls, American bullys, Rottweilers, dobermans, etc. The problem isn’t so much the those breeds but the ‘types’ of owners who have them which leads to so many horrific news stories about children being attacked.

My niece and her husband have a Doberman. He's highly trained and they're both lovely and responsible people. Not "chavs".

froufroufrou · 10/04/2022 07:08

@ilovesooty
I’m sure there are always exceptions!
I saw a Doberman on the bus a while ago and other passengers acted very afraid and the owner started giving out hell to them. She was a chav 😂
They came and sat near me and I thought he was lovely and talked to him, you could tell he was a sweetie.
It’s more about the owners than the breeds, you’re right.

FlambeTomato · 10/04/2022 07:18

I used to stop and protect my child when he was in a lower down buggy, but just wouldn't make it so obvious. I would suddenly need to lean right over him to adjust something / clean his face or whatever instead of standing in front of the buggy looking towards the dog. I did this with all dogs if the path was narrow (once an absolutely beautiful Labrador managed to nick a toy out of the buggy!)
I think YANBU to not leave your child in a vulnerable situation. I also think nobody should be shouting at you. However, I do think you acted a bit oddly and escalated things in doing so...

MarieG10 · 10/04/2022 07:19

YANBU but this is one of many similar posts about dogs and their owners. I'm afraid a significant number of owners live in rose tinted specs world where they are convinced their dog is lovely to all, will never attack and isn't aggressive. Unfortunately they are frequently wrong, and hence in the worst cases young children get mauled and occasionally killed.

My kids are not young any more but yes I would have protected them

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