To expect family money being passed on

[Soffana]

Am I being AIBU if I think that parents that had an inheritance and profited on that when it comes to property investment should pass money on to the next generation and not spend it all?

That money should be passed on from generation to generation?

For example helping next generation buying property?

@Pumperthepumper

Blossom, I’m well aware it’s the only way people can buy a house. It’s still a poor decision. Especially if you’re already in your mid-twenties when you sign up to it.

How can it be a poor decision if it’s the only way to buy? It isn’t even a decision, people don’t decide to be worse off. It would be a poor decision to rent for 35 years.

Blossom, because it means you’re tied into huge mortgage payments well into retirement age.

And also, nobody needs to buy a house. Renting is shit, especially in Britain, but it means you don’t have to make long-term financial commitments on a low salary, or be outpriced away from your family.

@Pumperthepumper

Blossom, because it means you’re tied into huge mortgage payments well into retirement age.

I know what it means 🙄

So you think it’s better to pay someone else’s mortgage for 35 years with monthly payments in excess of the cost of having your own mortgage and have nothing to show at the end of it.? If that’s your idea of good financial management please don’t give advice to anyone clueless.

@beachcitygirl

I would be supportive of 100% inheritance tax.

Otherwise the imbalance in society just keeps persisting.

Imbalance is society won't ever be evened out in every way. Doing this you may change the status quo, but you would still have an uneven society. You can't stop family minded people putting family first, whether that be dedicating time and effort into their child's education or spending/ gifting money to their children throughout their lives. Children would still be" at the mercy" for want of a better phrase, of their parents' attitude to life and family. Secondly, some people would prefer to spend any accumulated wealth on material possessions rather that pass it on as tax and therefore increase the nature of material consumption for the sake of it, rather than necessity.

@Pumperthepumper

Blossom, because it means you’re tied into huge mortgage payments well into retirement age.

But surely you would have to pay rent forever anyway? You can remortgage to have a shorter term later, and also mortgages are typically a lot lower than rent.

So you think it’s better to pay someone else’s mortgage for 35 years with monthly payments in excess of the cost of having your own mortgage and have nothing to show at the end of it.? If that’s your idea of good financial management please don’t give advice to anyone clueless.

I do, yes. Especially if those payments are crippling, rely on a second income and have forced you away from your family.

@Pumperthepumper

So you think it’s better to pay someone else’s mortgage for 35 years with monthly payments in excess of the cost of having your own mortgage and have nothing to show at the end of it.? If that’s your idea of good financial management please don’t give advice to anyone clueless.

I do, yes. Especially if those payments are crippling, rely on a second income and have forced you away from your family.

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Let’s hope your job isn’t in financial management.

Ocean, but you then have the financial freedom to walk away. I’m not saying it’s a good system, it isn’t. We should never be in a position where the vast majority of people need family support plus a second income plus a 35 year mortgage to buy their first home. But that’s what we’ve got - and coupled with fuel, energy and food costs, a 35 year mortgage should only be for the very rich (as a pp said, putting the difference in monthly payments into another investment).

Blossom, what’s your problem? Can you back off a bit if you can’t be civil? Take a break.

I have a 35 year mortgage which was advised to us. Reason being you don’t actually have to have it for 35 years. Ours is to lower out payments while we have childcare bills. Once we remortgage and have no childcare bills we will decrease the term. Probably to 25 years or 20 depending on the current climate. I don’t expect to have a mortgage in 35 years at all but it makes sense with childcare

Yes, I said that above. If you’re well off enough to play with it, good for you. That’s what they’re supposed to be for.

@Pumperthepumper

Blossom, what’s your problem? Can you back off a bit if you can’t be civil? Take a break.

I’ve been perfectly civil. I’m just utterly astonished that you’d describe a perfectly reasonable way of buying a property as bad financial management when you think paying rent over the same period is better. It’s bonkers.

No, it isn’t, as I explained. And the eye rolling is not civil.

My mum inherited money from her mother when she passed. I havent for a second in the last decade thought that I should see any of it. But I do suppose me and my sister will inherit my mum's house when the time comes.

If people pass on some inheritance before they die, that's very generous but it's not really to be expected!

@kittensinthekitchen

I've never known anyone but MNers to have this obsession with inheritance.

If the person is still alive, there's no inheritance. If they've got some and want you to have it when they die, grand. If not, make your own way in the world.

I never knew anyone who got an inheritance. When my parents passed, there was enough to bury them. That was it. Working class, poor don't have inheritances.

Don't live off capital. Inheritances definitely count as transfer of capital from one generation to the next. Invest it, buy assets with it, use it to improve our maintain assets. Spend the income generated. In accounting terms keep it on the family balance sheet.

This thread is hilarious when you consider the rabid response to the 'dementia tax'. So those that inherit should spend it, unless it is on their own care when they are elderly, in which case the state should fund it so their kids can get their inheritance. Ok then.

A friend of mine's parents inherited a substantial sum from their parents and had also been gifted money to buy a property when they were alive.

They then gloated about how they were planning to spend it all on themselves and that my friend should work hard for her own money like they did and not expect a penny. My friend hadn't even brought it up an certainly isn't grabby.

Everyone I know thinks they are utterly selfish, hypocritical dickheads.

My friend's grandparents were the nicest, most generous people and would be horrified at how their child and their partner are behaving.

@HelenWick

This thread is hilarious when you consider the rabid response to the 'dementia tax'. So those that inherit should spend it, unless it is on their own care when they are elderly, in which case the state should fund it so their kids can get their inheritance. Ok then.

That is a really good point. I’ve never understood the outrage at people selling their home to fund moving to a care home. If they are moving out of their house it seems entirely reasonable that they sell it to fund their new home, whether that is a bungalow, sheltered housing or a care home.

Does anyone on this thread think it is unreasonable for people to sell their property to fund moving to care home?

Does anyone on this thread think it is unreasonable for people to sell their property to fund moving to care home?

I don’t but I’m a member of a very tiny minority.

That is a really good point. I’ve never understood the outrage at people selling their home to fund moving to a care home. If they are moving out of their house it seems entirely reasonable that they sell it to fund their new home, whether that is a bungalow, sheltered housing or a care home.
There's a definite income/capital confusion going on here!

Does anyone on this thread think it is unreasonable for people to sell their property to fund moving to care home?
How can it possibly be unreasonable? They don't need it any more. And they need money to pay their fees. They don't have any choice.

I would rather my parents spent their money on themselves having an enjoyable retirement than leaving it to us.

In turn I hope that my I bring my children up with similar values.

I wouldn't expect anything but I can't help but be irritated by my inlaws. They have made it their mission in life to ignore relatives until they're at deaths door then gone to great lengths to ensure they grab as much from them yet happy, almost gleefully to tell us we're not getting anything when we haven't even asked! We've never had a penny off them and they had lots of help from their own parents.

Before anyone tells me 'But but but they deserve every penny they grab', these are people happy to go on big game hunting holidays in Africa, paying a fortune to bring back the dead carcasses yet can't be bothered to remember their grandchildrens birthdays.

My parents helped me loads . I'll do same with my kids xx