35 and denied alcohol

[antisocialsocialclub]

Bit of a light hearted one but I am actually annoyed.

Also this isn’t a stealth boast or humble brag at all, because I didn’t come out of this feeling in any way flattered or superior 🤣

I’m 35. I’d like to set the scene by saying I look my age, maybe on a good day I look 30. No way do I look like I’m in my 20s. I definitely look old enough to drink. I have several fine lines and the face a woman of my age has just from existing.

Having a few friends around tonight so just popped out to the shop to get some snacks and a bit of alcohol. I went with DH.

We were at the conveyor belt and the cashier was putting the food through. Then she paused at the alcohol. She looked at DH and then at me and said to me “do you have ID?” I just laughed then realised she was serious. I said I had nothing on me, DH showed his but the cashier said ‘sorry I can’t serve you as I can’t be sure you won’t give the alcohol to points at me’

I laughed and said ‘I’m 35!’ but she wouldn’t budge. I considered asking for the manager but wimped out. Didn’t fancy making a scene for the same outcome.

To cut a long story short, DH had to leave the alcohol because his ‘child bride’ 🤣 left her wallet at home. I actually felt a bit awkward that she thought my 42 year old DH (greying hair and all) was with an under 25 year old. Or did she think I was some street child forcing DH to buy me booze 😊

I know cashiers need to check, I know it’s the law and it’s hard for them etc etc but 1. wow, if she thought I was under 25 I must have had a hard life and 2. I just don’t understand the logic in this situation.

DH was buying the alcohol I was just gormlessly stood with him. What if a parent goes shopping with their underage child and wants to buy a bottle of wine? What they’re saying is you can’t buy alcohol unless everyone accompanying you has ID to confirm legal age?!

I think it’s madness. AIBU?

Also DH has just popped to another shop to get it and I decided I’d stay in the car like a naughty dog 😭 I’m 35!

it's bonkers! If Amazon want to ID people for alcohol then it needs doing before purchase, not on the bloody doorstep when they've happily taken your money at checkout! Or at the very least brief their drivers to exercise common sense!

I'm astonished at Amazon wanting the admin and ultimate refund and lost sale after going to all the trouble to deliver it to the house of the person who ordered it. Imagine deliberately both turning away a customer and also causing them ill-feeling.

It's also especially nasty to deny a 90yo his ordered and paid-for goods, as many people of his age-group would really struggle to get out to the shops with ease. Imagine if it was a knife set he'd ordered, to replace recently-broken ones, and then he was left unable to prepare vegetables and cut bread to feed himself, on the absolutely pathetic and thoroughly irrelevant grounds that somebody over 70 years younger than him wouldn't be allowed to buy the knives.

I've ordered DVDs before from Amazon (and other retailers) that were 12, 15 or 18 rated, and they've just been put through the letterbox - anybody underage could have intercepted, opened and watched them, just as against the law.

Seems common sense is also lacking on MN these days too.

And comprehension skills...

I got asked for I’d to buy an energy drink.
I’m 51 grey hair and a beard!
Think the cashier done it to make me feel good. (It worked)

If Amazon delivered your parcel of alcohol or knives to your 16 year old neighbour because you'd proved you were old enough to buy them would you be happy

Amazon shouldn't be delivering to neighbours unless I've specifically said so.

And if a 16 year old opens the door, so what? They won't know what's in there and I would say it was more a problem for their parents to solve if they think it's ok to open parcels that clearly aren't for them.

I also don't really understand the knife thing as you are far more likely to commit knife crime over 16 than you are under 16 (stabbings in London notwithstanding).

@Greenandcabbagelooking

I recently got ID'd for purchasing alcohol free cider. I'm in my 30s, and was wearing my work lanyard which says "I'm proud to teach at XYZ School". And the cider was alcohol free. There was no alcohol, it's just fizzy juice in a fancy bottle.

I had no ID, so no alcohol free cider for me.

Someone obviously hasn't programmed the tills right if it flags up a non-alcoholic cider. Or are we being nannying enough now that we won't sell non-alcoholic drinks to minors because they act as a gateway to the alcoholic ones.

I do think these rules need to be overhauled.

YABU.

When you work on checkouts it's massively hammered into you that if you sell to someone underage and it's found out the store can lose its licence, you'll be in massive trouble etc. They put the fear of god into you! As a checkout worker I remember once IDing someone who said she was 38, showed me her wedding ring and picture of a kid on her phone, showed me her car keys. But because I'd asked and she didn't have it, I couldn't sell her it. I felt terrible but my job was on the line.

Same with selling to someone accompanied by someone who is a minor, they are within their rights not to sell to them. Even if you say you'll send the minor off somewhere.

It's really not worth getting het up over, just go back to another checkout person stealthily or somewhere else and start carrying ID if you really don't want to be denied.

As a 34 year old I got IDed in superdrug for razors a couple weeks back, I didn't have it (I wasn't expecting to buy them and tbh I never buy booze or cigs so never carry it) and I made a joke about showing her my wedding ring and a photo of my kid and that I'm in my thirties but could tell she felt uncomfortable about it so I said don't worry it's fine, it's your job. She looked relieved and said she just didn't feel she could in case her manager saw.

@Greenandcabbagelooking

I recently got ID'd for purchasing alcohol free cider. I'm in my 30s, and was wearing my work lanyard which says "I'm proud to teach at XYZ School". And the cider was alcohol free. There was no alcohol, it's just fizzy juice in a fancy bottle.

I had no ID, so no alcohol free cider for me.

I suspect it said it was alcohol free but really had 0.5% alcohol in or something. I saw people be IDed for truffles infused with sherry once. Any alcohol and they will ID if there's any doubt in their mind.

I was stopped from buying a U certificate film in Sainsbury's once! Not even a PG. Late 20s at the time and asked what age they needed me to prove, they insisted I couldn't buy it without ID because of the Think 25 policy...