Page 2 | sick of lazy parents at soft play

lazyeffers16 · 2022-03-15T18:54:32+00:00

took my 11 month old to soft play today and YET AGAIN an older child (about 4ish) came in the under 2 section and tried to literally pick her up while she was playing. everytime i come i seem to have a kid come over and try to drag her or throw a ball pit ball off her head etc and there never seems to be a parent in sight?! wtf?? i tell them no myself (as in ‘no, don’t pick her up please/throw things at her/get off her please’) but am waiting for the day they go crying to mummy. aibu here? don’t understand where their parents disappear to

hangrylady · 15/03/2022 19:20

Am I terrible for feeling smug that my kids are too old for soft play now and I never have to endure it again? .

Piggybuttons · 15/03/2022 19:21

@Gizacluethen

Also sick of playing with other people's kids. Kids want to play with people. So if their parents won't play with them they just latch onto whatever adult is playing with their kid.

I go to softplay with my 3 year old and 9 month old sometimes. I do always play with her and follow her around (baby in arms) but she does sometimes latch on to other adults and try to follow them around a bit. She is very outgoing and although I gently try to distract her and say things like "that Mummy would like to play with just her little girl or boy let's do something else" she often responds "no, she's my friend".

It's really hard as I obviously don't want my daughter to annoy someone but it is difficult to distract her when she's made a new friend (normally because she likes their child and they aren't slowed down by crawling around carrying a baby) so it's not always a case of parents ignoring their kids and fobbing them off onto other adults or not playing with their own kids!

Ionlydomassiveones · 15/03/2022 19:22

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

ShakeYourSelf · 15/03/2022 19:25

@Ionlydomassiveones

“My 6 year old wouldn't be impressed if I followed her around.”

Wow. So the 6 year old dictates where the parent goes. Righto. God help you when she’s 16.

😂

Luhou · 15/03/2022 19:26

We have this at our local soft play. Child of 4ish in the sensory room, mother comes ij and tells me "if this ones giving you trouble, give her a smack" then leaves again.

I have considered telling the staff if it gets to out of hand, but not sure if they're able to do anything either.

Thasheblows88 · 15/03/2022 19:27

I go to softplay with my 3 year old and 9 month old sometimes. I do always play with her and follow her around (baby in arms) but she does sometimes latch on to other adults and try to follow them around a bit. She is very outgoing and although I gently try to distract her and say things like "that Mummy would like to play with just her little girl or boy let's do something else" she often responds "no, she's my friend".

It's really hard as I obviously don't want my daughter to annoy someone but it is difficult to distract her when she's made a new friend (normally because she likes their child and they aren't slowed down by crawling around carrying a baby) so it's not always a case of parents ignoring their kids and fobbing them off onto other adults or not playing with their own kids!

I think that's a different situation though Piggybuttons. I think it's ok when the parent is nearby like you and ready to jump in if something goes wrong. It's the parents who just sit down on a bench and never look up from their phones while their offspring run riot that are the worst culprits!

busyeatingbiscuits · 15/03/2022 19:27

The parents who insist on crawling around the soft play getting in kids way are fair game for having children want to play with them

Just stay out the way and let the kids play fgs!

Ribb · 15/03/2022 19:27

@hangrylady is it okay if I hate you just a tiny bit right now😬. I have age 2 and 5 so right in the thick of it. God help me!

Gizacluethen · 15/03/2022 19:29

@Piggybuttons I absolutely don't mind when the other parent is there too. It's kinda nice playing with our kids together. It's when someone's kid is doing something I don't know if they need help with or I'm trying to look after my little one and they're asking me to watch them do something.

@busyeatingbiscuits you need to be watching your own kid making sure they stay in the right bit. Not expecting other parents to tell your kids where they should be playing. I don't know what your kid is like. Are they gonna start crying because I've "told them off" and you're gonna come screaming at me because no one tell your precious darling what to do. Are they gonna tell me to fuck off? And 11mo is certainly not too young. DS has been able to climb the steps and go down the slide since he was about 8mo. With supervision obviously but it's one of his favourite things to do.

Original poster

lazyeffers16 · 15/03/2022 19:30

@Soubriquet

My local one has added a gate with a parent access keypad to the under 2 section. A fab idea and wish it was there when mine were that age

that is a brilliant idea

OP posts:

Original poster

lazyeffers16 · 15/03/2022 19:31

@Gizacluethen

Also sick of playing with other people's kids. Kids want to play with people. So if their parents won't play with them they just latch onto whatever adult is playing with their kid.

exactly. had this today aswell, little girl just kept following me and my LO wanting to play. like sorry no, i’m playing with my baby, i don’t want to entertain someone else’s kid

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vamptramp · 15/03/2022 19:33

Soft play is pure hell.

Ask the staff to do a tannoy announcement saying a child has lost its mum.

ReeseWitherfork · 15/03/2022 19:34

@busyeatingbiscuits

The whole point of soft play is that 4 year olds get to run off and play!

If they go in the wrong bit just send them nicely on their way.

I’d say an 11 month old is a bit too young for soft play anyway.

11 months is prime climbing/cruising age, soft play is godsend.

I've always tolerated older kids not being followed about (agree half the appeal is that you can send them off) but that doesn't remove the need for parents to watch them as best they can.

Original poster

lazyeffers16 · 15/03/2022 19:34

@busyeatingbiscuits

The whole point of soft play is that 4 year olds get to run off and play!

If they go in the wrong bit just send them nicely on their way.

I’d say an 11 month old is a bit too young for soft play anyway.

11 months isn’t too young at all, the under 2’s section is full of babies even smaller

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RewildingAmbridge · 15/03/2022 19:37

You need your teacher voice, now this section is for babies, you shouldn't be in here should you, you need to go and find your mummy or daddy, if you can't find them I'll go and fetch the man/lady who works here

BillyAndTheSillies · 15/03/2022 19:39

This drives me mad. It seems to be a place where some people go to basically not parent for an hour or two.

I get it if you want to catch up with friends with children, but just keep an eye on your kids to make sure they're not upsetting or hurting other kids. Or expect other parents to entertain your children.

My eldest isn't interested in it any more, my youngest loves it but we only go once every few months - arrive as it opens when it's quiet. Never ever ever at weekends or school holidays, unless it's a school party.

Whitefire · 15/03/2022 19:40

@Ionlydomassiveones

“My 6 year old wouldn't be impressed if I followed her around.”

Wow. So the 6 year old dictates where the parent goes. Righto. God help you when she’s 16.

It seems I only have another 3 days to go before I get one of these awful 16 year olds. Maybe if I take her back to softplay tomorrow and follow her around I can reverse the spell. Hope so, she's been an alright 15 year old.

tigerlilymochalatte · 15/03/2022 19:40

@busyeatingbiscuits

The parents who insist on crawling around the soft play getting in kids way are fair game for having children want to play with them

Just stay out the way and let the kids play fgs!

But theres always some brat whos kicking, pushing or being too boisterous that the parents cant be bothered to parent, hence the parents of little ones having to follow theirs around.

See if everyone kept an eye on their own kids (as is your job as a parent) instead of just letting them just get on with it, everyone would be happy.

Thasheblows88 · 15/03/2022 19:41

@busyeatingbiscuits

The parents who insist on crawling around the soft play getting in kids way are fair game for having children want to play with them

Just stay out the way and let the kids play fgs!

No we are not crawling around and we are not fair game thanks! We are keeping an eye on our own DC and it would be better if everyone did the same.

Sceptre86 · 15/03/2022 19:43

You will get loads of parents on here saying the joy of softplay is that the kids don't need to be followed but can be left to play, this sorts will be glued to their phones eg. my husband. Mine are 4 and 5 and I still go in with them periodically to check they are OK, one has gross motor issues so still needs encouragement and sometimes help. If you are the only adult in there you will attract other kids to you, it can be annoying. My 4 year old knows not to try to pick his 6 month old baby sister up but he is a typical 4 year old and has no sense of danger. I would be watching to make sure he didn't go in the baby section.

Whitefire · 15/03/2022 19:44

You need to carefully pick your soft plays, some are better than others when they are little.

Oh and never go in the school holidays if you have small ones.

OchonAgusOchonOh · 15/03/2022 19:47

@Clarabe1

I have been left watching other peoples kids on holiday abroad while parents get pissed or sunbathe by the pool. Unbelievable. I got myself into the ridiculous situation where I didn’t dare go for a walk with my husband because the mothers were slogging wine down their neck and the Greek lifeguard was flirting with them. Doesn’t surprise me in the least about soft play.

I'm sorry but you were being a total mug unless the parents were friends of yours and you had agreed to take it in turns to watch all the kids. You chose to take on the responsibility and play the martyr. You could have equally chosen not to take on the responsibility and done your own thing.

Makeitsoso · 15/03/2022 19:51

@Ionlydomassiveones

“My 6 year old wouldn't be impressed if I followed her around.”

Wow. So the 6 year old dictates where the parent goes. Righto. God help you when she’s 16.

It honestly would be a weird to follow a 6year old around soft play. I have literally never seen an older child with a parent tailing them. Most often they have a great time making friends with other children. 90% this is fine and no major disagreements. We are doing children a disservice if we never allow them to play independently. They don’t get close supervision on the playground. There are hundred kids to an adult. Obviously if there is an issue, parents need to get involved. There is a big difference between what’s responsible parenting for a toddler and a six year old.

stressbucket1 · 15/03/2022 19:52

Just before the pandemic hit I really started to like soft play. Kids were old enough to run off and play and I could relax with a coffee. That's what it was made for. I knew full well my kids won't hurt anyone or be too boisterous nor did they need help getting around.
When they are tiny you don't like the bigger kids in the baby area, when they are bigger you don't like the tiny kids with parents in the big area!
They are too old to go now but I can see all sides!

Whitefire · 15/03/2022 19:52

If every adult was in the frame as well it would be chaos, the vast majority of children do not need an adult behind them. Adults generally get in the way.

However in all my soft play years I rarely had an issue, and nothing that wasn't dealt with by "ooh be careful, they're only little'. There was one incident where a small child placed both hands on ds's chest and sent him flying backwards, parents completely oblivious. We were about to leave anyway so I just picked him up and went.