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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to wonder if Botox and fillers now normal?

463 replies

Av0bo55 · 13/03/2022 06:23

I’ve so so many friends that have these now and really do feel I’m the odd one out
Friends all between 30-45 and look amazing! I’ve got to admit I’m very tempted but a bit nervous and also Ttc one last time, so unsure if it’s safe to do if Ttc???
and should I wait! I’m 40 early next year so was thinking about maybe then!
So how many have tried /or already do it? What’s your thoughts? Good?

OP posts:
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9
Fritilleries · 13/03/2022 08:12

@Huckleberries73

I really do love how women say - I can tell. You bloody can’t on ones that are done well. Yep - loads of bad ones about. But loads of amazing ones.

No one in my family or friendship group have noticed, I just look fresher and less tired.
I defy anyone to look at me and know it’s been done.

Pics or it didn't happen...Wink
Frostylaudanum · 13/03/2022 08:13

I would never do it; neither do I know anyone who has.

MysweetAudrina · 13/03/2022 08:15

Personally, I blame zoom. I have to look at my own face on camera for up to 6 hours a day, when before covid, I might have glanced in a mirror twice a day in the loo. I went for a package before Christmas, a tailored mix of filler and Botox. I don't notice much difference but the before and after shots are remarkable in terms of the droop being lifted.

Fritilleries · 13/03/2022 08:16

I was at a wedding as bridesmaid and both hair stylist and make up artist had been 'done.' I was sat there, looking like crap, listening to how it's a great preventative measure. For what, how long? We'll all end up 80odd, 90odd... it's fucking terrifying how insidious the slow creep of ageism reaches. What is so bloody wrong with you know, faces that move? Even on Inventing Anna, people were commenting on Anna Chlumsky's 'gurning' when she is literally 37 and moving her face!!! Rage rage rage!

OdeToSadDisco · 13/03/2022 08:17

Early 40s and to my knowledge only one person I know has had botox.i dont think I've even heard fillers mentioned outside of MN.

Beautiful3 · 13/03/2022 08:23

If you had asked me this last year, I'd have said no. Since January my friend's had 3 areas botoxed, and is now considering fillers. Another friend's 29 year old sister has started having it too! It's everywhere!

Beautiful3 · 13/03/2022 08:23

It's all over tik tok too.

Turningpurple · 13/03/2022 08:26

I have botox. And I don't tell anyone. No one guesses. I do get lots of compliments on my skin and people generally think I am a few years younger. Not loads younger though.

I dont have a shiny forehead. Also the woman that does it, does it so there is still movement. Its just not as pronounced.

Even dp doesn't know. But will comment that I look less tired and stressed a few weeks after I have it done. My mum would have definitely said if she thought I did have it, she didn't keep anything to herself. Grin

Oddly I get asked where I get my lip fillers done all the time. I don't have lip fillers, but do have full lips. Never had fillers so can't comment on them.

Siameasy · 13/03/2022 08:27

Why do people on these threads always say “if it’s done well you can’t tell” yet you get so many rich and famous people looking frankly weird so yes you can bloody tell and no it’s not normal.

Nitgel · 13/03/2022 08:27

I think it looks awful and really makes people look strange. Just my opinion. So many weird pouts and waxy faces. Have no idea why you would do that to your actual face when there are such good cosmetics about now.

Getyourarseofffthequattro · 13/03/2022 08:28

@RealRaymondReddington

I think they look awful, you can always tell too. I also find it odd that people are willing to do that to their bodies just for the feeling of looking a little younger. I don't know many people that have had it in my friendship group/family.
You can't always tell at all. There's probably loads of people who've had work done that you haven't even noticed. A good practitioner doesn't make it obvious.
Getyourarseofffthequattro · 13/03/2022 08:30

@Siameasy

Why do people on these threads always say “if it’s done well you can’t tell” yet you get so many rich and famous people looking frankly weird so yes you can bloody tell and no it’s not normal.
.....a lot of those people haven't just had fillers and Botox, they've had full blown cosmetic surgery which is of course more obvious and looks "weird"

I do think you can easily overdo it, but generally you're not going to look weird from small amounts of filler, and if you do, it's been done wrong.

PinkNails1 · 13/03/2022 08:32

So many people think they’ve had a subtle “tweakment” but I think they can be really obvious. So many women in their 20s and 30s have all sorts of fillers and it makes 30 year olds look like they’re 40 trying to look 25. Most have a shiny surprised face.

KatharinaRosalie · 13/03/2022 08:36

Have no idea why you would do that to your actual face when there are such good cosmetics about now.

No cosmetics will do what a good filler can. Just not possible, nowhere close.
And of course you only see the ones who have had theirs badly done, or who have simply gone too far with it. I've had fillers a few times, still looking like me, just more fresh and less tired and haggard.

Dembones292 · 13/03/2022 08:37

Irs utterly ridiculous. Unless you're committed to doing it for the rest of your life then you're fighting a losing battle and the ones who are prepared to do it long term end up looking seriously odd. Hopefully it'll fall put of fashion. I know 2 people who have it in real life, they love it but the truth is that they don't look any younger, we all know how old they are, they just look a bit strange. What's wrong with having wrinkles anyway?

I had a weekend away recently. Lots of young staff all with tight, swollen duck lips.

PinkNails1 · 13/03/2022 08:37

@Getyourarseofffthequattro A good practitioner doesn't make it obvious.

How do you explain the millionaires with awful fillers/plastic surgery? It’s so obvious and they look like a totally different person. The women (eg Instagram influencers, Kardashians or The Real Housewives) all end up with the same face. Their skin is so waxy and shiny. Their eyes and eyebrows look strange. They have swollen trout pouts. Their bums are never realistic.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 13/03/2022 08:38

I know loads of people with Botox (have been having it since mid 20s)

Siameasy · 13/03/2022 08:40

There are rich and famous people (mainly women) with access to the best available-people who are already above average in looks and many of them look ridiculous now because they can’t face no longer being “stunning”.

Once you start getting “work” done it seems to lead to a desire for more. It’s not selling it to me; I’m never going to think this is normal- and note, it’s mainly women getting stuff injected into their skin. Men are allowed to age.

Also if you can’t tell then what’s the point?

Emperor’s new clothes. Totally normal -nothing to see here.

Dembones292 · 13/03/2022 08:40

And for those saying their family and friends can't tell. They can. They're just being polite about it.

Turningpurple · 13/03/2022 08:42

[quote PinkNails1]**@Getyourarseofffthequattro* A good practitioner doesn't make it obvious.*

How do you explain the millionaires with awful fillers/plastic surgery? It’s so obvious and they look like a totally different person. The women (eg Instagram influencers, Kardashians or The Real Housewives) all end up with the same face. Their skin is so waxy and shiny. Their eyes and eyebrows look strange. They have swollen trout pouts. Their bums are never realistic.[/quote]
Because I would imagine they have the money to go over board. And also their entire lives are based on how they look. It eoikd easy to get carried away and have more and more. If you feel your lips look better with a bit of filler, maybe a bit more would look better, then a bit more.

It would be very easy to go down the rabbit hole where you think you need more and more and more. The Kardashians get loads of attention everytime they have something noticeable done. It's in their interest to make sure it is over the top. They don't want subtle.

Being a celebrity or having money doesn't mean you always make sensible decisions

Clarabe1 · 13/03/2022 08:43

I think it looks good when you are in your early 40s and it minimizes the first affects of aging. However once you get into your late forties and fifties loss of volume is the biggest problem so that when the fillers come in and that is also when you start to look like a complete dick with a big shiny face desperately trying to cling on to your youth. Nobody likes getting old but it is inevitable. Better to look old than ridiculous!

Turningpurple · 13/03/2022 08:45

@Dembones292

And for those saying their family and friends can't tell. They can. They're just being polite about it.
As I said, my mum and best friend definitely would not be polite about it. Mum hated botox, completely against it. She would have definitely said something along the lines of 'what have you done to your face'. Dp would too.

Simple fact is that you notice when it's obvious. You could know loads of people who have it done, but not know. Because you only know when it's obvious.

blibblibs · 13/03/2022 08:45

It's definitely becoming more mainstream. I work in small place in a rural village and 7 out of 9 staff have had Botox and/or fillers.
It's only me (female) and the only male that haven't succumbed.

OfstedOffred · 13/03/2022 08:47

Yuck.definitely not normal in my book. No substitute for actually looking after your skin.

BiscuitLover3678 · 13/03/2022 08:48

I agree where do you live? I don’t know anyone yet.