To not buy non vegan food

[Ellie198712]

I’ve recently (2 months ago) gone vegan after watching Earthlings and thinking about how I can’t honestly distinguish between eating a dog or a cow.

DH isn’t vegan and has no intent of becoming one, which is fine, obviously ideally I’d like if we could be a plant based household but it’s his life and diet!

However I feel really uncomfortable buying him eggs and meat when I go to the shops. Today it’s caused a bit of a row as I popped into our veg shop to stock up on veg and he asked me to pick up milk and eggs. I said I didn’t really want to buy them 🤦‍♀️

He’ll eat it what he wants of course but I don’t want to buy things associated with animal suffering really 🤷🏼‍♀️

So what would happen if DP decided he didn't want to buy/eat highly-processed, chemical-laden stuff?
No meat substitutes for you then

@Pumpfive

You're being ridiculous. You've made a choice 2 months ago to become vegan but were fine buying milk before that point? You expect the family to do two separate shopping trips a week ? What difference does it make if you pick it up from the shops or him? It's still your family money pot buying the products.

What if OP was a smoker and quit 2 months ago and was being asked to buy his cigarettes? Would that be OK then because it was only 2 months ago and she was ok buying them before? Boundaries are boundaries and her OH's need for a bacon sarnie doesn't trump that. Ignore the vegan bashers, OP. Do whats right for you. Personally (DH is now veggie/dairy free so not fully vegan but what works for him) but before he quit I was OK with buying him meat, but that was my choice. I buy him eggs now too, but again my choice. He wouldn't pressure me if I wasn't comfortable.

@donquixotedelamancha She didn’t say he didn’t like it, just that he didn’t fancy it. Ordering a takeaway when someone has cooked you a meal is really shitty behaviour, irrespective of whether it’s vegan.

@Carpy899

Would the people who are calling the OP a twat etc expect a Muslim to pick them up a bottle of vodka?

I'm not calling her a twat but firstly, yes, if she was shopping for her household and other people drank.

Secondly, its completely different. If she was Muslim she wouldn't have suddenly refused to consume any alcohol in the last two months despite doing so her whole married life.

[quote Ellie198712]@donquixotedelamancha but why would that annoy you? He cooked chicken fajitas earlier in the week as his choice of meal. I obviously didn’t eat it but just had the veg and wrap!

Same for tonight, he could’ve fried himself an egg or some chicken to add to the noodles! He just fancied a burger[/quote]
Well he couldn't because you refused to pick any up when you went to the shop

Sorry but I think YABU. I have always been vegetarian and recently gone vegan but still buy meat/fish/dairy products for my DH, adult DS and his GF

@DelilahBucket

So you would actually force two shopping trips as a family because of your dietary choice? This would really wind me up. Why should the household suffer because you've made a choice to eat differently. You are effectively forcing that choice on others. Would it be acceptable to you if he popped to the shops and refused to buy you some processed vegan food because he really doesn't agree with how it is produced?

The household 'suffering' not getting their fill of flesh is only a tiny, tiny percentage of what the animals suffer.

YANBU OP. Don't fund the horror of industrial farming if you don't want to.

The household 'suffering' not getting their fill of flesh is only a tiny, tiny percentage of what the animals suffer.

Is there a siren that goes off calling all vegans when the word 'vegan' is used in a thread?

I've been both vegan and vegetarian (not at the same time obviously) for over a decade.

My partner eats meat and I will buy him it occasionally (he doesnt eat meat in the house except as a rarity). I have no problem buying it for him, because he eats it.

You refusing to buy it won't make him quit eating it.

YABU. Everything you eat an animal has suffered for. Every, single thing unless you’ve grown it yourself.

Thousands of animals are chopped up by combines, same for birds being shot to keep them off crops, rabbits, foxes etc… Billons of insects are dying. Millions of bees in particular if you are eating any sort of almonds.

Animals are used to increase soil health of fresh produce, their manure is used as fertiliser. Crops are fertilised with ground up fish bones and blood, especially if you are eating organic.

Surely nobody is that naive?

I get this and I feel the same, we have had similar discussions and I have persuaded DH to try alternative milks and he has found one he likes for drinks and one for cereal. I try and get him to have higher welfare meat and dairy products and eggs and as minimal as possible as a sort of compromise

As regards the deforestation, I think beef and palm oil has also been heavily involved in that, but that seems to have been missed in the comments to point out why veganism is bad.

Also you know the alternative milks are not better for the environment don’t you

How long before you get offended seeing his meat items in the fridge, take offence at him cooking meat in the same pans you use etc? I know a couple who divorced over this - the recently turned vegan could not cope with their wife eating meat and it tore them apart.

Milk comparison

@Hyppogriff

Also you know the alternative milks are not better for the environment don’t you

Just more nonsense. Do the tiniest bit of research.

You think it’s better to use the petrol for two separate shop trips?

My partner and I are in a similar situation (although I'm vegetarian not vegan). I do all the shopping and take a slightly different approach, which might be a good compromise? I'm under no illusion that my partner would want to be vege, so I know that one way or another meat will be consumed, so instead of letting him buy it separately, I buy it and that way I can make sure we always get free range, organic, red tractor assured meat, dairy and eggs, so at least I know what he's eating had a good life.

@girlmom21

The household 'suffering' not getting their fill of flesh is only a tiny, tiny percentage of what the animals suffer.

Is there a siren that goes off calling all vegans when the word 'vegan' is used in a thread?

Excuse me? Are you saying industrial farming is just fine and involves no suffering?

@girlmom21

The household 'suffering' not getting their fill of flesh is only a tiny, tiny percentage of what the animals suffer.

Is there a siren that goes off calling all vegans when the word 'vegan' is used in a thread?

What? You mean vegans like to post on threads where veganism is discussed. Get away!

AHH just get him some chops to wrap his gnashers round

@Georgyporky

So what would happen if DP decided he didn't want to buy/eat highly-processed, chemical-laden stuff? No meat substitutes for you then

Lots of vegetarians, pescatarians and vegans don’t eat meat substitutes

@AWavyLine

DP ordered a beef burger for delivery as he didn’t fancy that

This would really annoy me.

Why? Genuine question , is her partner supposed to eat vegan/ anything he doesn't like ? I wouldn't, if my DH cooked something I didn't like ( which he wouldn't , cos we chat about that kind of stuff ) I would have no qualms about ordering in something else that I liked