To ask if you screamed or stayed silent in labour?

[WibbleWobbleWibble]

The other night I was watching an old episode of call the midwife with my mum and dad. Both of the women giving birth were screaming the place down and it got us chatting.........my brother was born at home and my dad said he never heard a sound from my mum even though he was in the next room (1971 dads were not welcome in the delivery room).
My mum said that she couldn't identify with the screaming woman as she went quiet when she was in labour, I was the same, I went quiet and didn't say a word during both my deliveries.
Judging by TV and movie representations of women giving birth everyone screams! I think just as many women stay quiet as scream, it's whatever works for you ..........

YANBU I didn't scream
YABU I screamed the place down

1st involved screaming as I was on the drip and they broke my waters. It was so intense and painful.

#2 was 20 mins from beginning to end. I was silent other than telling them to get the fucking drugs from the ambulance because I knew I wasn't going to make it to hospital and was focussing on what I needed to do. Because I was silent the paramedics didn't believe I was in full labour.

#3 I was completely in control at home. The mw said it was the quietest birth she'd ever attended.

@00deed1988 my throat was fine but I bit through my lip as I screamed and it was sooo swollen afterwards.

Very silly!

Just remembered that when I was giving birth to my second I did shout out only once. I was induced at 9pm and in a ward with no DH waiting for things to happen. I didn't get a moment's sleep as I was having uncomfortable cramping/contractions but nothing unmanageable. At 3.45 I finally dozed off for literally a minute and woke up, shouting out in pain. Woke the poor woman next to me up too and she so kindly went and got a midwife for me. I was absolutely mortified I'd disturbed her and just kept apologising. I was 4/5 cm dilated, told to call my husband and tell him to get there asap and delivered baby less than an hour later. Didn't make a sound in the delivery room.

Like other women were saying, I was definitely mooing with my first though. That's the best way to describe it for sure! Never made a noise like that before or since!!

Little bit of talking more complaining in the lead up to pushing with dd1 then quiet, dd2 nothing I even asked for the radio to be turned off as the noise was annoying me!

I screamed the place down both times, until they gave me the epidural. They couldn't stick it in me fast enough!

I didn't scream. They said I must have a really high pain threshold as I was smiling and talking (no epidural.. just gas and air for the 20 minutes I was pushing). I was expecting it to be bad and so nervous about giving birth so I was pleasantly surprised!

Screamed. When I finally got some gas and air and the nurse stopped telling me I wasn't even in active labour, I was very quiet, so much so the midwife struggled to know when my contractions were.

I think screaming comes from a place of panic and fear.

Moaning and grunting and mooing all very normal though, I guess it differs for everyone.

@janj2301

I love the TV shows where the mum has just given birth, her hair and makeup are perfect and she's handed a 3 month old very clean child to nurse.

And the placenta seems to have magically disappeared!

@00deed1988

I screamed as I pushed his head out but was fairly quiet for most of the labour.

I am a midwife on a birth centre so no epidurals and honestly it is about 50/50. I tend to find precipitate labours, alot of women panic and lose control and it leads to screaming. Some start in transition. Some have really lulled me into a false sense of security as they are so silent and all of a sudden you see a head. Alot of people moan through the contractions. There is no right or wrong though. I never tell a woman not to scream, maybe during the pushing I advise to direct the energy downwards if they can or just say if they can breathe ect as their throats are going to be so sore afterwards.

Really interesting to hear about a midwife's experience.

I went quiet - very unlike me. Should have known then things were not right.............

I remember really vividly with DC3 going completely in on myself. Just blocking out the entire room to the point it felt like I was somewhere else. It was such a weird experience. Even the midwife said she'd never seen anything like it. I never made a single sound.

I bet having a good scream would have been really satisfying though.

Like many PPs I didn't scream but I was loud. I can't really describe the sound I made - DH could probably explain it better as he was hearing it rather than making it! I was just doing what I had to do to get through it. It was kind of a moan/grunt/cry, very primal. I do remember when I was giving birth to DC1, at the pushing stage, a senior midwife told me that instead of yelling I should channel the energy into pushing (she did it in a nice way) and I did manage it but it was a very conscious effort.

DC2 was born at home and the neighbours heard, I was (and still am) a bit mortified about it tbh, feels like they heard me at my most vulnerable. But they did all congratulate me afterwards and seemed admiring rather than judgy, thankfully.

I'm sure there are some women who actually scream but I doubt it's hugely common. It just seems one of the many silly and unrealistic things about depiction of childbirth in tv/film.

I let out 1 scream with DS2 as I went into the pushing stage, otherwise I was pretty silent in all 3 labours. I couldn’t speak to anyone, I needed to pace around and just zoned into myself - with DD I didn’t have any drugs and I felt like I was in a drug induced haze, very odd. But no not a screamer, or with the 4 acute pancreatitis attacks I’ve had plus many gallstone attacks (and a ruptured appendix). Waste of energy for me

I went from 0cm to baby in less than 40 minutes, yes I made a lot of noise! It was like being hit by a train.

I was told off for screaming and told to be quiet.

I did the gutteral growl too during pushing. Such an odd noise

I didn't make any noise during contractions; my husband complained afterwards how boring it was that I wasn't chatting with him haha. I made a bit of a raah noise when I pushing baby out but he flew out so it didn't last very long.

I was quiet for both my birthing experiences

Screamed my head off both times but particularly with DS2 as I went from waters breaking to baby arriving within an hour

@SnowWhitesRestingBitchFace - same with my last baby, I felt drugged to the eyeballs but only had 2 paracetamol and tens machine! I was properly spaced out

I didn't scream, I was very quiet.
Many many years ago a colleague of mine said she screamed so much the midwife slapped her face 😱

I didnt make much noise, moaned a bit but I was induced and it was a very fast labour an hour and a half. I know my sister screamed the place down as she told me.

With my first two, I wasn't silent but wasn't screaming. Some groans & moans & lots of heavy breathing. Honestly, while painful, both were manageable labours. I was very lucky.

I remember hearing a woman absolutely shrieking just after one of my deliveries & being 'wow'.

I then was extremely smug prior to my 3rd labour, assuming the baby would 'just pop out'.

Yeah, that bit me on the arse. I had a short, but horrendous labour - I mean, not horrendous really, reading stories here, I was fine, baby was fine - but. The. Pain. 😱 I dilated very quickly & I screamed the place down. I was like a lunatic. I can stop remember utterly believing I was going to die, and didn't care. I can't believe the difference from the other 2 labours.

When DS was delivered, I wouldn't even look at him, let alone hold him.

I think I groaned and cried but I didn't scream.

@TeddyTonks

I went from 0cm to baby in less than 40 minutes, yes I made a lot of noise! It was like being hit by a train.

Oh God yes. I hear you.