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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask if you screamed or stayed silent in labour?

625 replies

WibbleWobbleWibble · 05/03/2022 18:14

The other night I was watching an old episode of call the midwife with my mum and dad. Both of the women giving birth were screaming the place down and it got us chatting.........my brother was born at home and my dad said he never heard a sound from my mum even though he was in the next room (1971 dads were not welcome in the delivery room).
My mum said that she couldn't identify with the screaming woman as she went quiet when she was in labour, I was the same, I went quiet and didn't say a word during both my deliveries.
Judging by TV and movie representations of women giving birth everyone screams! I think just as many women stay quiet as scream, it's whatever works for you ..........

YANBU I didn't scream
YABU I screamed the place down

OP posts:
Tara336 · 07/03/2022 21:02

My midwife said I was the quietest Labour she had ever experienced in fact I kept falling asleep, I did wake up once because another woman was screaming, I asked the midwife if she could ask her to be quiet, my midwife said shes having her baby I replied "so am I no need for all that noise" and promptly went back to sleep 🤣

cafedesreves · 07/03/2022 21:03

@Draineddraineddrained

I will say here and now though I'd happily do labour again rather than have severe mastitis. Just the utter, total, full body bone deep pain and uncontrollable chills, feeling like utter utter shit and having to look after and attempt to breastfeed a baby through it all was far far worse than either labour.
Ugh such bad memories of mastitis. So horrible.
SartresSoul · 07/03/2022 21:14

Nope, I didn’t scream. I made noises which were very animalistic and I doubt I’ll ever make such noises again but no screaming.

TellOrNot1981 · 07/03/2022 21:32

Dc 1 - completely silent except 2 blood curdling screams - one for the head and one for the shoulders.

Dc 2 - I was a bit more vocal as I had no midwife and had been left in a room still standing in my clothes in agony with no pain relief and I needed to push, so I think the series of screams I let out then were out of panic/to get someone’s attention.

Cherryana · 07/03/2022 21:39

I was quiet and before I had the epidural 24 hours in, when I returned to myself, I was lolling all over because I was soooooooo physically drained. No energy.

WaitinginVain · 07/03/2022 21:46

Completely silent.

Chonfox · 07/03/2022 22:00

As others have said, I had that feral moaning sound that I had zero control over! It felt very primal. It only came at the pushing stage, before that I was silent. for the most part. I said to my husband after that I could hear myself loo-ing like a cow calving but I couldn't stop it - he's from a family of dairy farmers and he didn't disagree Blush. That was my second un-medicated labour. With the first I was drugged up to the eyeballs and there was nothing natural or "primal" about it! I was mostly silent during that one.

Rubyupbeat · 07/03/2022 22:25

I was quiet, even though it hurt like hell!

abw94 · 07/03/2022 22:38

YANBU, I just cried

Slavetolove · 07/03/2022 22:46

I mooed. I have a video of me doing it, it was automatic and I couldn’t stop it. I also kept repeating a conversation about announcing the birth on Facebook and what I was going to write between pushing. I would say the first bit and my birthing partners and midwife would finish what I was thinking. It blew my mind tbat they could read my mind. Turned out I just kept repeating it for 20 solid minutes. All recorded 😂

Slavetolove · 07/03/2022 22:47

I was off my face on pethadine and gas n air 😂

Scottishmum1984 · 07/03/2022 23:23

Screamed the place down!

AlwaysLatte · 07/03/2022 23:29

I went really quiet, I was expecting to be howling like on Tv!

Hagpie · 07/03/2022 23:35

I was worried with my first so was silent most of it and then heavy pushing sounds when she told me told me the baby was in trouble and needed to come out NOW.
Second one I barely made it to the hospital because of how quick it was (less than 20 mins total). Luckily I was already on my way for something to help me sleep! It was so intense I just went into the meditative state I had half-listened about on YouTube.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 07/03/2022 23:40

I don't think I screamed, but I definitely made some noise. I don't actually think I've ever genuinely screamed in pain - a short sharp shout maybe upon a stubbed toe, but horrible pain like that I tend to moan and cry which I know I did with DS3!

I know I also hummed as I remembered it from the episode of ER when Carol has her twins Grin.

Workinghardeveryday · 08/03/2022 00:04

I screamed and screamed until the midwife said push your scream down and push like you are doing the biggest poo of your life 😂

Workinghardeveryday · 08/03/2022 00:05

Only screamed whilst pushing though - 90 minutes

tympanic · 08/03/2022 01:11

How sad this thread is split by those who genuinely want to read about and share their experiences, and those who are either: a) Completely ignorant to the fact everyone's experiences in life are different and/or b) Insist on using the profound experience of birthing a child as a stick to beat other women with, while justifying their smug superiority complex and helping to perpetuate the "hysterical woman" trope. So very, very sad.

Bromse · 08/03/2022 02:01

@Cherryana

I was quiet and before I had the epidural 24 hours in, when I returned to myself, I was lolling all over because I was soooooooo physically drained. No energy.
I am horrified to think of 24 hours in labour in hospital - and then more. That must have been a dreadful experience.
Jellybellywellysmelly · 08/03/2022 02:10

1st was out of it so didn’t really make any noise apart from a bit of effort groaning when pushing when I couldn’t actually feel anything coz of epidural
2nd first bit of labour lots of screeching and swearing as it was agony. When I got in pool I calmed down and then moooing for pushing bit

Buzzinwithbez · 09/03/2022 10:35

Too right I screamed.
It felt GREAT and was more about doing it because I could and would be supported rather than previously when I'd given birth under a chemical cosh. It was a great way of getting our some of the trauma of that prior experience and helped me to move on from that first birth.

flyingdream · 11/03/2022 04:42

Those of you who didn't scream did you have any pain relief? Because the pain I felt was like lightning bolts x 100000000000000 in my lower stomach and even more with my second who was breech!

flyingdream · 11/03/2022 04:43

I'm seriously considering an epidural in any future pregnancies!

LairyMaclary · 11/03/2022 05:23

Some whimpering and swearing during the contractions, and something akin to a growl during the pushing stage. I could hear a fair amount of screaming coming from other rooms though.

AuxArmesCitoyens · 11/03/2022 06:25

I had a fast labour (under 2 hours) and no pain relief. I have a clear memory of being at a red light in the car at night and the people crossing the riad looking at the car in horror at the sounds coming out of me Grin