Are we crazy - WWYD?

[Corneliafunk]

DH and I have won a trip away for 3 nights towards the end of next month!! We have to decide soon what we will do, but taking the kids with us is not an option. We are thinking of leaving them at home alone. They are 13 and 15 years. I have confidence/trust that they will keep to the usual routine during this time and get themselves off to school on the bus etc. The eldest one does most of the cooking anyway, so can do dinners ok although we would keep everything simple while we were away. They do argue but say they will spend most of the time separately in their rooms. Their grandmother lives nearby and can keep an eye on them. Alternatively, she could come to stay but doesn't keep great health so we can't really rely on this. She is also v worried about Covid..
And Covid is in some of the local schools. We have been told to prepare them for remote learning if there aren't enough teachers available on-site (which we have done).

We have friends who could each take one, but the kids don't want to do this and it would mean mattresses on the floor and disruption for our friends, altho they wouldn't mind for the short time. The prize means the distance we will be away is a couple of hours by car, but then a short boat ride to an island in a lake which sounds very cool! Not sure about cell coverage, but suspect not.
Would you think the kids are old enough and just do it and leave them at home alone (which is what we want to do), or should we make some sort of arrangement for them where they are with adults even if it is just in the evenings? Would you think we could leave them even in the knowledge that remote learning could suddenly be required while we are away?

YANBU - leave the kids at home alone
YABU- don't leave the kids home alone

@Migrainesbythedozen

There you go again with your cluelessness about children. I'm willing to bet you don't have any 😂

What do children do when they're scared? They go to their parents. Which obviously they cannot do if the parents are absent.

I can't believe I had to spell that out for you.

And no, it doesn't "build resilience" to abandon children, it actually weakens them and makes them more vulnerable.

I was one of the most laid back parents on the planet but no. The 15 year old possibly but not in charge of a younger sibling. Get gran to stay, her risk’s no greater in your house than her own.

I’ve left my 14 and 15 year old for one night several times but we have cameras all around the outside of the house. I FaceTime my daughter and go round the house at night with her making sure all the doors are locked and they haven’t left the cooker on or something.

[quote sweetbellyhigh]@Migrainesbythedozen

There you go again with your cluelessness about children. I'm willing to bet you don't have any 😂

What do children do when they're scared? They go to their parents. Which obviously they cannot do if the parents are absent.

I can't believe I had to spell that out for you.

And no, it doesn't "build resilience" to abandon children, it actually weakens them and makes them more vulnerable.
[/quote]
@sweetbellyhigh Wow, you sound really angry. We are not talking about 8 year olds here, we are talking about a 15 year old who most likely would be stronger and braver than the mother.

It's clear you have zero experience with children. 😂

[quote sweetbellyhigh]@Migrainesbythedozen

There you go again with your cluelessness about children. I'm willing to bet you don't have any 😂

What do children do when they're scared? They go to their parents. Which obviously they cannot do if the parents are absent.

I can't believe I had to spell that out for you.

And no, it doesn't "build resilience" to abandon children, it actually weakens them and makes them more vulnerable.
[/quote]
Yes, and, in fact, the feeling often doesn't get to the "scared" stage if parents are there anyway. Perhaps they don't even notice the noises when parents are there. Having parents present provides children with a feeling of security and when that security is removed, they can experience everyday things very differently.

I'm all for allowing children to gain independence. But my first time away from them definitely wouldn't be three hours away in a possible low mobile coverage area for three nights when they're 15 and 13. I'm really surprised that anyone thinks that's acceptable.

Oh gosh no, we can't expose teenager to creaks or bumps

@ChikaCherryCola my 15 year old would not be in charge they are all very capable and mature. That is why only you know your own child and what they are capable of.

It’s too young. I’m leaving my 19 and 17 year old for the first time this year.