Private school Parties

[7plusMum34]

Those of you who have kids in private schools please tell me the kind of parties you have been to. I’m really nervous as I will have to hold a party very early on as child starting private in September and her birthday is 2 weeks in! I have nothing to compare with as we’ve not done a party for her before and haven’t been to any either I think due to COVID mainly.

I want to have a party btw do I don’t feel in any way pressured but I don’t know what the norm is. Don’t want to go OTT and don’t want it looking embarrassing either. Please help!

Mine have friends in state & private- they’re the same as any other parties. Over the years some mine have been to are:
Home/ garden + theme
Village hall + theme (pirates, fairies, princesses, Harry Potter etc)
Entertainer- magic, disco, games etc.
Mad Science
Pool party with inflatables
Trampoline Park
Bowling
Go-Karting
Cinema + food
Football
Gymnastics
Zorbing
Zoo / animal experience
Just do whatever you and your daughter are happiest with.

What is your budget?

@7plusMum34

Thank you all so much! I feel less stressed now. Yes definitely agree I should stay away from hall type now as I will have to arrange everything. Trampolining sounds fun. Issue is my daughter will just say she wants it at home like her cousins have but it’s going to be extra stress on me hosting at home!

Thank you all. I’m getting baby to sleep now so I’ll come back in later to check for more ideas. Sorry I thought I’d already posted but not sure - they’ll be 7-8 year olds. Probably 20-22 in the class. Im planning on inviting everyone plus her 2 cousins and friends from current school so 35 kids in total.

Magician/entertainer if your DC wants to be at home. (Make sure they have good reviews). Then pizza and cake for everyone. Then party bags and home. Two hours and done!

Seen all sorts. Science parties, entertainers, circus skills, bouncy castles and running about, laser quest, swimming, build a bear, climbing, bowling, football, animals,, pottery painting, soft play...

Honestly, if it's something kids enjoy it will do. Feed them crisps and cake and plenty of sweets and a couple of carrot sticks. Alternatively a huge pizza order goes down well and saves a lot of effort.

It is true that DD has been invited to a couple of breath taking ones but generally they're the exception and not the rule .

Mine are much older now, but...

• Invite every member of the class to avoid a clique situation
• try to go for a vague theme (pirates/superheroes/sporty/whatever stuff 7yo kids are into lately) but try to keep it gender neutral
• if you really want to avoid hosting, see if there's a sports place nearby that can host a kids' party
• get an entertainer if you can. Doesn't need to be someone amazing, just a standard kids entertainer. See Google for tips
• offer standard sarnies, jelly, fruit, etc for food and keep drinks simple
• finish with a short story so kids go home knackered but calm. Nobody likes to get a hyperactive kid back from a party

In the past I've had
Pirates/treasure island/Peter Pan
Superheroes
Magic (with a magician)
Pony party (girls only because boys had become smelly and horrible at that point)
Some sort of Disney bullshit thing
Hawaiian (some sort of Disney based bullshit)
Beach Party (paddling pool and swimwear)
Pool party (at a local swimming pool)

One for the older kids - booze party with music and a watchful eye

Also get a loud disco speaker and one of those plug-in coloured disco lights for the first 20 mins while you’re waiting for everyone to arrive.
With 35 kids, don’t bother with pass the parcel (I speak from experience!)

Not a single idea, I've only ever hosted or attended hoi polloi parties.

An activity party (trampolining/climbing etc) will be at least £10 per child, if not £15+. That’s a lot for 35 kids, and is why I used to book a hall and a magician. The entertainer runs the whole thing for an hour or so, then you get the party tea out. Lots of parents will muck in at that point, helping your put things out, and clearing up at the end. That sort of party is a good way to get to know the parents too.

If you want to get to know the parents and have them stay then you'll need to consider welcoming siblings as well. Some parents will bring siblings regardless of your wishes so if you DON'T want them there make it clear on the invite.

Some people like to over display their perceived wealth. The rest of us lower expectations and just hire a village hall and a bit of entertainment. Football parties were big in DS’s circle , one of the sports TAs had a profitable sideline running them. He was also a part time DJ which came in handy as they got older. He knew all their names and there was never any trouble.

My party tea is:
Sandwiches; ham, jam, cream cheese and cucumber
Hula hoops
Skips
Grapes
Party Rings
Chocolate Fingers
Sausages on sticks
Cheese and pineapple on sticks.

Pile of Krispy Kreme doughnuts with candles instead of cake was popular when DD was 8 ish.

If you’re stressed about it and new to the school, pick an activity locally that your daughter will enjoy, invite her cousins, couple of current friends and new schoolmates, bring cake ... sit back and watch and learn! As long as your daughter has a good time, nothing else matters.

I feel your pain having a September baby too!! I would agree with everyone else, a whole range of parties/themes but generally exactly the same as any other children’s party.

We’ve never done a huge class party as it’s my daughters idea of hell so have instead gone for classic tea party at home with party games. Reception and year1 generally everyone had whole class/year group parties at soft play/farms or gymnastic places but since Covid everyone seems to have moved onto smaller groups- which I think naturally happens at this age anyway.

Please don’t worry about being judged, I’ve never heard another parent bad mouth any child’s party, or actually even discuss a party after the event! I think we worry when it’s our own child’s party but in actual fact no one gives a hoot other than you 😂

My advice is just make sure there’s a structure and enough to keep them busy and never go over 2/3 hours for a party at this age. It tends to either be an hour activity, hour for food and cake then home or another hour after food to play.

Party bags always tend to be a table of books that the children can choose from on their way out.

Good luck OP, I’m sure it will be fabulous whatever you do 😊

I had 4 kids through private school, we hosted softplay, climbing, swimming, tree tops adventures, gladiator ( slightly older soft play inflatables type thing) at primary school age, they went to similar plus football parties.
It moved onto other things like paintball but they need to be older than that.
If your dc is new to the school you need to invite the whole class so if they are likely to nearly all 8+ then go swimming with inflatables ( we had loads of really good parties with this) if very few 8+ and you don’t have a lot of spare adults ( don’t ask the parents) then go for gladiators/climbing type thing.

At age 7/8 we're moving away from the village hall type parties and into activity parties. Go Ape, bowling, trampoline park, ninja warrior, climbing walls, etc. Princess parties were at about age 5/6.

Depends on the private school and the parents. I would just do what you feel comfortable with and what your daughter wants.

At about that age we did mass sleepovers for DD and 5-6 friends, starting off with games, nail painting etc, then pizzas and a movie while snuggling in their sleeping bags. They loved it! I was hiding in the kitchen with the gin…
A couple of years later, when she wanted a mix of boys and girls we went to Inflatanation and they had an amazing time - basically a huge bouncy castle/assault course. Places like that will put on food and drink to make it a proper party, although I just bought them each a slushee
I honestly don’t think you need to worry more due to the school your child is now going to. I went to private school, my child goes to state school - I haven’t noticed much difference in the types of parties. Have fun planning it!

My DS is 7 and his friends parties have ranged from indoor multisport, go karting, a party in the park.... wouldnt stress about it tbh

The local leisure centre may have a bunch of sporty party options at different price points and for different numbers of children. Ours was well utilised esp when the children were between about 6 and about 10. For tinies, ditto the local softplay ball put thingy.

My children (part state, part private) had or went to parties involving:

• at home
• visit to local farm park
• bowling
• crazy golf
• swimming or trip to nearest water park style place
• McDonald's
• pizza place
• ice cream parlour
• cinema
• trampolining (as a sport, not a trampoline park thing)
• theatre trip
• local theme park
• trip to zoo or exotic animal or bird place
• Go Ape and similar
• karting
• soft play (these were about once a week at one point, or felt like it, and so frequent we did not ourselves then do the same)
• bouncy castle in garden
• entertainer in village hall and traditional party games
• disco type thing in village hall

We could only afford one of those parties every other year, for varying numbers of children attending depending on the activity and age group, so the alternate year was a trip out with just family or one friend which worked out cheaper. We always made sure we took along a decent present (what we could manage, though, not what we thought they though we should!) so that there wasn't an issue of not reciprocating on the party front later because the present IS the reciprocation.

How have you avoided parties this last year? We have had a constant stream since September.

The ones that have been most enjoyable have been quite structured with someone quite clearly in charge. Some of the ones that have been free for alls have had quite challenging behaviour and a fair few tears. If you can afford it, I’d definitely do one where there is an activity and someone is in charge that isn’t you.

The great thing about being the first to have a party, is that you don't have to try to live up to what others might do, and you don't have to worry about duplication, with one of your DC's having a party at the same soft play a week before yours.

Personally I think having 35 kids is insane. Is that what your DD wants? You said that she really wanted a party at home, so I don't know why you just don't do that and let her invite just her good friends.

With up to 35 you’re prob looking at soft play/trampolining/swimming party (swimming would be the most economical for this number in our area). With this size definitely do an activity party - and ideally just order in takeaway pizza for the tea, followed by cake - loved by all with minimal hassle!!

Exactly the same as any other school. Either at home or a restaurant or venue. Lots of fun, games, food and drink, party bags - time for them to go home. End of until next year.

We have been to all sorts. Anything from a massive ballroom in 5 star hotel, complete with entertainers for the children, little stands with sweets/candy floss etc and food and champagne for the adults to very low key town halls.

In your position, I would find a place, probably a pub or someplace they serve food which has a nice upper floor they rent out. Then organise an entertainer for the children, pizzas for everyone, a nice cake and Prosecco for all adults who are staying. The entertainer frees you up to encourage parents to have Prosecco or non alcoholic drinks and a nice chat whilst the children are having fun.

These days (children older and I am more lazy) I tend to have football parties for my son (coaches, a pitch, cake and crisps) and I would probably do a sleepover for my girls’ best friends.

But our children go to single sex schools and there is nowhere I will take on 25 -30 boys around 10-11. Football coaches are handy. And as DS is sports obsessed it works.

The girls have a few close friends and would rather have something more special with them than inviting the whole class for something.

My DD is friends with the DD of an extremely well known YouTuber/influencer (who is regularly invited to do things like IACGMOOH and strictly and is extremely wealthy). Her last party was in a village hall with an entertainer. With proper old fashioned party food. And everyone had a great time.

Honestly unless you’ve chosen an absolute snobfest of a school I’m sure any party will be enjoyed by the kids.