To think ut makes sense for the parent leaving the house for work to do the nursery run?

[Tartankilts]

Goes past the nursery so this makes sense, but is it unfair always to be one person?

What time does he log on for work?
Who does the end of the day pick up?

He could put in a flexible working request if he needs more time to do the drop off before getting back home?

My DH does, it probably adds 15 minutes to his journey but I don’t drive and he likes chatting to DD on the way. It works well, I get her up and ready (which is a battle) and she meets him by the front door to put her shoes on. If I drove he probably would still do it because he’s up and dressed for work anyway unless he was very late or had an early meeting.

It depends.

While I was pregnant and WFH i did all nursery runs,
Now that I am in mat.leave with a newborn it is a nightmare to get the 2 kids ready on time, go out in the rain etc so my DH is doing all runs.

Also I obviously always pick her up (half days)

I do 9/10 drop offs and pick ups (at nursery 3 days and my parents’ house 2 days) but that’s mainly because we chose a nursery next to my work and I finish earlier than dh. I have a Monday morning meeting and then a very busy day so he drops off with my parents then. I think it makes sense and it generally works well but I do get annoyed that his idea of helping in the morning is to get the 4yo dressed, leaving me to get the baby ready and fed, myself ready and bags etc packed!

I do end of day pickups.

DH logs on for work at 830, so we start at similar times.

I am surprised by the 'adding time to journey' comments. It's part of the day, a responsibility. Your lives are not work and how fast you can make it to work. Some people need to re-evaluate their journeys and work life balance, no wonder children in the UK have such poor mental health. More positivity about getting to school rather than it being terribly inconvenient for the adults that chose to have children could be a start! (All parents there, adults need to be more adult and share responsibilities fairly).

@Tartankilts

I do end of day pickups.

DH logs on for work at 830, so we start at similar times.

Do you have to rush on an evening too or are timings better then?

You shouldn't have to do both all the time.

He could drop off at 7:30 and still have time for breakfast and catch up on Eastenders rather than you rushing around, presumably.

I take my youngest every day I work to nursery as it’s on the way to my work, my OH takes our other one to school though

@Tartankilts

Goes past the nursery so this makes sense, but is it unfair always to be one person?

Not at all. It adds 5/10 mins to my journey. It would take my WFH DH 45 minutes to do the nursery run otherwise. I don't begrudge it at all. It's really nice waving DC goodbye in morning. Is your DH in a huff about it?

@Onlyforcake er what?

I don’t think my 15 month old has poor mental health and if she did it wouldn’t be because I drop her at nursery in the morning!

Oh dear. Choosing to miss the point. Take away from that as you will. It's your life. You and your partner can choose to be miserable every day or you can choose a different approach.

Do you make it to work on time doing the nursery drop off?

Does dh pick up any additional chores at home while working (eg laundry in while waiting for the kettle to boil / prep dinner during his lunch break etc)?

@Tartankilts

I do end of day pickups.

DH logs on for work at 830, so we start at similar times.

Thats not on then. Ask him to make a flexible working request to start at 9 so he can pull his weight.

@Onlyforcake

Oh dear. Choosing to miss the point. Take away from that as you will. It's your life. You and your partner can choose to be miserable every day or you can choose a different approach.

No one said they were miserable every day

Thats not on then. Ask him to make a flexible working request to start at 9 so he can pull his weight

Unless the nursery is 45mins from home, he shouldn't need to. 7.30 drop off, be home for 8.30 log in.

@Onlyforcake

Oh dear. Choosing to miss the point. Take away from that as you will. It's your life. You and your partner can choose to be miserable every day or you can choose a different approach.

Baffled.

I’m not miserable (wtf?)

And in keeping with this theme I genuinely have no idea what you’re on about. I’m not in any way trying to be rude but I don’t see what childrens mental health has to do with the nursery run, unless you are one of these batshit people who think kids shouldn’t go to nursery.

Whoever is working from home does the school/nursery runs here.
The person going to the office leaves too early/comes back too late.

When we are both wfh DH tends to do the nursery run with DS2 while I get DS1 ready for school.

My husband drops our son off to the childminder's on his way to work because I either work from home or drive to work, and the childminder lives opposite the station.

I would add that it only makes sense for the parent who works outside the home to always to the drop off if it isn't too far out of their way.

And if my husband was in a particular hurry I would of course take our son to the childminder even though it's not on my way.

I think it depends on who is most busy in the morning/needs to start at a certain time. Dh works from his business premises and I wfh. Most days dh does morning run as I do the afternoon one (which is more of a pain as it cuts into my work day - one pick up at 3 and the other at 5), but I'm closer during the day. But days when I don't have an early meeting, I do it and dh can get on to work a bit earlier to get started on things. If one of us has a day off, obviously then we always do it on that day.

In your case, if you are both working, and he works near nursery and you don't, then most days, yes, he should do it. Exception being if he has an early meeting or something to prepare for or some other reason he needs to get in early or not risk being late.

Not always,when DD was at nursery we could drop off from 8am and I had to be at work by 8.30am so doing drop off meant getting there just before 8am so I could be first at the door and then leg it to the car and hope that there wouldn't be bad traffic so I could drive to town, park and walk to the office in 27 minutes or less.

Same on the way home, often I'd be staring at the dashboard clock thinking 'I have 17 mins to get to nursery and it's a 15 min drive, please god let's the lights be green the rest of the way'?

If the WFH parent has more flexibility then while it may seem counter intuitive to both head in the same direction at the same kind of time then it makes more sense.

I mean if you are already leaving the house and going past the nursery, it does make sense in my mind!

Do you drive there or walk there? It would be illogical in my mind to have both parents leave, one with DC one without to go to the same spot (or past it) for one to carry on and the other double back.

OK so you both start work at the same time.

You drive to work so leave earlier and then earlier still to drop DS off. Then you leave in time to do pick ups.

He wfh so gets that extra time to himself.

If you both left together, he could do drop off and you straight to work and you'd both log in around the same time.

I think he needs to be doing three drop offs a week to your two.