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AIBU?

DSD booked afternoon tea but not paid

785 replies

bluefloweronyellow · 03/02/2022 23:18

So it's my birthday on Saturday. DSD and her DH have booked me and DH in for posh afternoon tea on the Sunday afternoon at top restaurant.

I thanked her tonight for such a thoughtful gift etc and asked her to clarify time and is there a reference number for the gift etc

She gave me a photo of the reservation booking and said it's all booked under my name and have a wonderful time I just have to pay on the day

So the gift is she reserved a table. This is so like her. She genuinely thinks she's given me a gift. I gently asked again, to be clear, I pay on the day and yes, that way I can have whatever I want.

I'm just flabbergasted.

AIBU (clearly fucking not but feel free to comment if you disagree)

Oh, and I'm going to go as I do like the place and you do have to book well in advance but never heard that making a reservation is the gift!!!!

OP posts:

Report

EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 03/02/2022 23:53

@Littlehouseonthefairy

😆😊 what a great thread! She has given you the gift of an entertaining tale to recount forever more. You must ring her up and tell her how great it was and thank her. 😆

You're right. It's the gift that keeps on giving in a relatively benign and wholly entertaining sense.

bluefloweronyellow · 03/02/2022 23:54

@listsandbudgets

But even if she is socially unaware surely her DH saw the flaw in this generous plan!!

He adores her. Treats her like she's made of precious China. He's very well off and money is no issue. They have a great life and very happy.

She'd be an amazing reality star.

OP posts:

apprenticewage · 03/02/2022 23:54

I'm going to say that she's not quite as dense as you are being led to believe @bluefloweronyellow she is happily stringing everyone along in thinking it though! She sounds very manipulative, lazy and entitled to be honest

Litchum · 03/02/2022 23:54

@Merryoldgoat

But why wouldn’t you say ‘how’s that a gift?’

Why do people put up with so much shit?!

Exactly. In real life, someone would say something.

greenlynx · 03/02/2022 23:55

She’s getting away with this nonsense because you allow her. She is an adult just treat her accordingly.

Juletide · 03/02/2022 23:55

No ones that stupid.

L0stinCyberspace · 03/02/2022 23:56

@bluefloweronyellow my goodness, university? Did she graduate?

If yes, then she needs to be rapidly disabused of her "unusual angles" because no amount of pretty makes your "gift" acceptable behaviour for an adult.

spiralspiralspiral · 03/02/2022 23:57

She can have quite unusual angles on subjects.

What does this mean, though? Unusual as in original thinking?

Or unusual as in can't really grasp more complex ideas, which becomes apparent in a discussion - even if an adoring admirer is 'helping' with essays and coursework?

AAAAAGHH · 03/02/2022 23:57

She hasn't bought you a gift.
I ain't buying this thread.
Classics my Arse!

UniversalAunt · 03/02/2022 23:57

Taking the time to make you a booking is a favour, not a gift.

That she’s a graduate, with no LD or MH issues, that cannot hold down a job sounds peculiar. How does she pay her bills etc?

StarsAreWishes · 03/02/2022 23:57

You have to call her out on this!

UniversalAunt · 03/02/2022 23:58

Just seen…DH.

PyongyangKipperbang · 03/02/2022 23:58

"Thank you for your card. I am confused about why you would think that me having to pay £100+ for lunch is a gift but thank you for the thought. I have cancelled the reservation"

grapewine · 04/02/2022 00:00

@greenlynx

She’s getting away with this nonsense because you allow her. She is an adult just treat her accordingly.

Exactly. Why is everyone treating her like a princess? I just don't get it. But then I'm not beautiful with a rich husband, so I live in the real world where this kind of learned incompetence is intensely annoying.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 04/02/2022 00:01

@Luredbyapomegranate

That’s very funny (and also awful).

I would cancel it, otherwise how are you going to make the point?!

Yeah I would cancel as well as she will be bleating on about what a great gift she got you and she'll end up doing the same for someone else!

T00Ts · 04/02/2022 00:01

Oh OP, even you sound overly indulgent towards her. Being beautiful shouldn’t give you a free pass to be selfish. Her having a loaded adoring husband makes this wise, somehow.

PaulaTrilloe · 04/02/2022 00:02

Maybe buy her a copy of the Daily Fail and see if she recognises the storyline if this gets picked up.

What a CF!

bluefloweronyellow · 04/02/2022 00:02

I have low expectations from people for gifts and I'm rarely disappointed for this reason but even I was flabbergasted at this one.

It's fine. It's harmless. At my age I don't let things wind me up too much. Life is too short.

We will go as I do like a nice afternoon tea at the place.

OP posts:

Pantsomime · 04/02/2022 00:03

Arranging for you to spend money in a certain venue and calling it a gift is ridiculous. As men are all over her and she’s “dense” do you think she’s vulnerable and at risk of being taken advantage of?

InvalidCrumb · 04/02/2022 00:05

Go on OP, there must be something you can tell us about their wedding, if you were on the scene then.

I know that sounds horribly bitchy but MN goes crazy at most wedding discussion and I'd bet money she made at least one "faux pas" (according to MN anyway)...

Ozanj · 04/02/2022 00:05

@bluefloweronyellow

She's 32 and dense. Not mean or anything but not a thinker.

She genuinely thinks she's given a gift.

DH rolled his eyes.

How is she ever going to improve if you don’t tell her? Bet she doesn’t make this kind of idiotic mistake with friends or colleagues.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 04/02/2022 00:09

I agree that she must have very considerable learning difficulties - which I'm sure you would have mentioned, or otherwise not started the thread at all - or alternatively, she's learnt to use her looks to play dim and blag her way through life.

I also wonder why her DH didn't pick up on it - he must know what she's like, so how come he didn't question it when he didn't see the cost of the 'present' appear on any accounts? Are you absolutely sure that they're completely happy together - and that she's not being kept in a gilded cage, where she can theoretically have anything she likes but still always has to ask him for permission, as if she were a small child?

I seem to recall playing at cafes and charging my parents to buy their own squash and biscuits again, but I was very young; but 32?!?!?!

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Supersimkin2 · 04/02/2022 00:09

How clever to be that stupid.

HardbackWriter · 04/02/2022 00:09

I really don't think she's either as nice or as clueless as you think she is.

WildPoinsettia · 04/02/2022 00:09

@grapewine

So the gift is she reserved a table. This is so like her. She genuinely thinks she's given me a gift.

How is a grown adult so fucking dense? That's ridiculous.

I don't believe it either. She has to know it's a shit "gift". The comment about paying on the day "so you can have whatever you want" shows she's thought about the paying of it and decided not to, then dressed up her meanness to look like a kindness so you can't argue. She's taking you for a mug OP.

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