Husband didn’t mention he is doing yoga or having massages. AIBU?

[Tiffany80s]

I went to turn off my husband’s phone alarm this morning and saw a message from a number that didn’t have a name saved and the message had been saved in WhatsApp under “archived” messages. The profile pic was a woman- the message said something about not worrying about missing a few weeks and that she was going to “work him hard next time”. I asked him what this was about and he said he took up yoga to help with back ache (from work). I asked him why he didn’t tell me and he said he thought I would make a joke of it and tease him. Months ago he mentioned my brother in law doing yoga and I actually told him I thought it was great he was doing it. I just had a really bad feeling about it, my instincts told me something wasn’t right. I asked him to show the payments for this. When he showed me the payment, I saw another regular series of payments to another woman. When I noticed the first payment , I asked him who that was, and he said he didn’t know anything about it. When I scrolled further there were 6 more payments, weekly. His face fell and I asked him who he had made the payments to. This time he said he had been going for sports massages. I can’t understand why he would not mention this to me. You know something along the lines of “ my backs been hurting but I went for a massage today and I feel so much better”. My husband insists it is all above board. The line of work he is in it is common to see chiropractors for back aches etc. I can’t help feeling there is more to this. AIBU?

Ask him to demonstrate his yoga moves.

Escorts are usually paid in cash and not bank transfer.

Asking him to show you is a great idea!
Ask if you can go the next class with him

Would an escort tell him not to worry about missing a few weeks?

Dominatrix my guess

Very odd he would not mention going to yoga or having a massage at the time. Sounds like escort service to me. Google their phone numbers, and names.

"Work you hard" is not a phrase you're likely to hear from a yoga instructor.
Sounds like a dominatrix to me. At the very least he's seeing escorts.

You should be able to check these people (and their prices) out. If they are legitimately yoga instructors / massage therapists it should be pretty obvious from advertising.

It's very un-yogic to say you would "work someone hard" - that doesn't really sound like a yoga teacher tbh.

£145 is a lot of yoga classes. Most are £7-10 a class so it's a huge number to buy in one go...

I think you all have a very overactive imagination. Those who think it is sexwork. £145 bank transfer makes it sound a holistic service of some kind.

A yoga teacher could easily say they would work him harder next time. If they are one on one or in a small group.

@Jedsnewstar

It’s the hiding it and instant denial about the message. I’m confused about the yogi instructor, is it one on one, normally it is a class. If a class it would seem an odd message for the instructor to send one person.

This

@Guacamole001

Escorts are usually paid in cash and not bank transfer.

Independent ones prefer cash. An escort agency will take bank transfers

Hes archiving the messsages on WhatsApp. You only do that if yours hiding something! There is literally no other option

I'm sorry op but this looks like it could be escorts or massages with a 'happy ending'.

He's cheating.

Yeah I suspect he’s having “massages”.

Couples Yoga and Massages are very "in" at the moment. Volunteer to join him

YANBU I'd say it's a strange to not mention the yoga and massages to you especially if he's had a bad back. It would give me a bad feeling too. I would take the numbers and google them, find out where he goes and do some research on the quiet and call them and ask what they do and their prices.

Sorry to say it OP but my immediate assumption here would be.... he is cheating/paying escorts etc.

Red flags all over it.

Dominatrix my guess

I do love MN

Would a yoga instructor really care if you missed a class and message people?
Recently a man died and the 'ladies' giving the happy ending had to call the authorities

Sorry OP, it must be really upsetting. Do a bit of digging, calling get a man to call numbers looking for a list of services. You deserve better than this, you might have a tough journey but ultimately you need to know.