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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To find this effing unbelieveable **MNHQ adding content warning for CSA**

216 replies

Imnotafemistbut · 25/01/2022 13:12

A man has raped a child and walks free from court as the judge appears to blame the child.

courtnewsuk.co.uk/rapist-walks-free-after-judge-says-12-year-old-was-sexualised/

OP posts:
Bowlofhotslop · 25/01/2022 18:28

Ffs some people clearly can’t read very well! She wasn’t living in a car, he was. The prosecution and judge agreed he had no interest in underage girls and there was no grooming. He wasn’t “trawling Tinder for 16 year olds to have sex with” either. Her age on tinder was 20 and she claimed to have her own car and home. They had been messaging for months before they were caught by her mother who told him about her age. The judge actually said that he had no sexual interest in children and was looking for a relationship.
It’s obviously awful for the girl and what has led her to this but it’s not victim blaming to say he thought she was over 16!

Omicrone · 25/01/2022 18:29

And actually yeah, I think if you are in the habit of looking for 16 year old girls on Tinder for a.shag, then checking ID might not be a terrible idea.

Allsorts1 · 25/01/2022 18:30

@WonderfulYou I agree - she was the one holding the information knowing it would ruin his life. Obviously her story must be very sad, but actively doing this to someone when the rape rules are so so clear... I doubt either of them thought about this much so I’m sure it wasn’t international on her part to put him at such risk, but I do still feel more sorry for him.

He’s the one with the record that will follow him forever, she can move forward with her life and leave this behind. I’m glad the judge was sympathetic to his case.

Nanny0gg · 25/01/2022 18:30

[quote whiteworldgettingwhiter]@Nanny0gg - she wasn't living in a car.

He was.

The judge said 'Mascall was living in a car at the time of the offences, having been kicked out of the family home... You were 19 and just at that time were sofa surfing. You come from a supportive and close family but at that time your relatively straight religious parents had turned you out because they perceived you had been acting wrong-headed. They thought you were living with a friend but you were sofa surfing and living in a car.'

I have no idea where they met. Presumably not at her home if they had sex in the car park at Westfields?[/quote]
Apologies

SleepingStandingUp · 25/01/2022 18:30

@AlDanvers

No, he believed her to have one. Photos of hee parents house, photos In Dad's car etc. They met somewhere else but even so, house where parents are out for large chunks of the day...

Where is this information coming from?

Sorry I didn't mean it as fact. I mean he cited he believed her to have a house and car. Presumably given they met in tinder anything he would have seen would be her parents. No one is actually suggesting she had those things. Just that he was led to believe it. It isn't exactly hard to fake.
Dixiechickonhols · 25/01/2022 18:30

Samphire I assume reporting restriction now lifted on him as his pic and name in Dailymail?!
The fact there was initially a reporting restriction on his name as an adult isn’t typical and reflects unusual nature of case.

AlDanvers · 25/01/2022 18:30

@Omicrone

And actually yeah, I think if you are in the habit of looking for 16 year old girls on Tinder for a.shag, then checking ID might not be a terrible idea.
He wasn't looking for 16 year old girls.
Bowlofhotslop · 25/01/2022 18:31

@Omicrone well if you bothered to read the article he obviously wasn’t, she said she was 20.

AlDanvers · 25/01/2022 18:31

@SleepingStandingUp don't apologise I was just wondering if there was more details somewhere. Sorry if it came across like I was being an arse Smile

SantaClawsServiette · 25/01/2022 18:35

@Omicrone

Yes, I agree. I feel sorry for them both, but slightly more for the young man.

A 12 year old girl has been raped but you feel more sorry for the man.

Here's an idea for starters: Don't go trawling Tinder for 16 year old girls to have sex with, then you might not end up with someone who turns out to be fucking twelve.

While I think it's a bit odd for people not to feel terrible for whatever is wrong in the girl's life, I am not sure this is fair. For one thing he was under the impression she was 20. But even if she had been 16,they would both be teenagers. Sixteen is the age of consent. Casual sex is widely socially acceptable, vast numbers of people use it, OLD is even more widely accepted, and the vast majority of teens now spend significant amounts of their social life on servers and meet "friends" that way.

It's not surprising this didn't feel off to him.

SamphiretheStickerist · 25/01/2022 18:36

@Dixiechickonhols

Samphire I assume reporting restriction now lifted on him as his pic and name in Dailymail?! The fact there was initially a reporting restriction on his name as an adult isn’t typical and reflects unusual nature of case.
Ah! I didn't doublecheck n the timings of publication. You are right.
SantaClawsServiette · 25/01/2022 18:37

But - it's also not fair to blame her for knowing she could get him in trouble. That's not an insight I'd expect from a girl that age, though I'd sure as heck be pointing it out to her after the fact.

SamphiretheStickerist · 25/01/2022 18:43

@SantaClawsServiette

But - it's also not fair to blame her for knowing she could get him in trouble. That's not an insight I'd expect from a girl that age, though I'd sure as heck be pointing it out to her after the fact.
Has anyone blamed her?

She is described as having been sexualised. That isn't blaming her, as it is something that happens to someone, is done to them, by individuals or wider society.

I am an old fogey and I think that many, many very young kids are sexualised in many, many ways. There is a meme floating around of a typical 'girl next door'. One from the 1980s is a damn sight younger looking than today's girls. It's scary and makes me happy to be too old for it to touch my life directly.

BluebellsareBlue · 25/01/2022 18:43

Have to agree with the judges ruling here no matter how sad for the girl and her circumstances

SantaClawsServiette · 25/01/2022 18:50

SamphiretheStickerist

Several posters in the last few pages said things along the lines of they felt more sorry for him because she had landed him in it, or she held all the cards. I agree she's clearly troubled for some reason, but I don't think it's reasonable to expect that would would anticipate the probably outcomes for a man she became involved with. So I don't see why that would make people feel less sorry for her.

bigdecisionstomake · 25/01/2022 19:08

Having read everything I agree with the judge's ruling too. Terribly sorry for both of them, I hope they both get the help they need.

WonderfulYou · 25/01/2022 19:15

So I don't see why that would make people feel less sorry for her.

Because he’s done nothing intentionally wrong but she has - so that alone would make me feel more sorry for him than her.

Also because now his life is ruined as he will be known as a rapist and a peado, so will be attacked, shuned and struggle getting jobs too etc, yet she doesn’t have that problem.

Obviously a 12 year old girl on tinder looking for men to have sex with, intentionally lying about her age and aspects of her life to make her sound older, tells me that she has massive issues and no doubt there are big concerns at home.
So she is in the wrong but at such a young age her parents should also take some responsibility.

emuloc · 25/01/2022 19:15

@Omicrone

Are 16 year old girls generally out there looking for sex on Tinder? Surely that would be a red flag for that bloke in itself?
She never said she was 16, more like 20. Why would that be a red flag to anybody?
Porcupineintherough · 25/01/2022 19:19

Yes I'm sure tinder is full of 20 year old women with houses and cars desperate to fuck immature strange men in car parks.

Lockheart · 25/01/2022 19:27

It is a terribly sad situation all around.

She's a young teenager who I would guess has been abused as a child and lacks a loving family and any sort of adult guidance.

He's a young man who was kicked out and forced to live in a car, and has unwittingly committed a horrible crime which will follow him around for the rest of his life. It's right that he's been punished for it though and I think the punishment is appropriate in the circumstances.

Both of them are young people who have been failed awfully by their families and all those who should have been looking after them and have ended up suffering needlessly for it.

Omicrone · 25/01/2022 19:28

So he thought she was 20 then, not 16? He honestly believed that a 12 year old was actually 20, even after spending time with her in real life?

He is either very dim and extremely immature, or must have had suspicions that she wasn't being truthful about her age but decided to ignore them.

We're not talking about a 15 year old, it's a twelve year old, it's barely out of primary school. How can anyone get that confused with a 20 year old?

I mean, the judge has ruled on this and they have all the evidence, but I just don't get it.

Lockheart · 25/01/2022 19:35

He is either very dim and extremely immature

There are a lot of people around who aren't at the usual level of average intelligence, it's not exactly a remote possibility.

AlDanvers · 25/01/2022 19:37

Everyone who has even in loved with said he was very immature.

Its right there in the story.

AlDanvers · 25/01/2022 19:37

Involved not in loved Blush

emuloc · 25/01/2022 19:56

@Lockheart

He is either very dim and extremely immature

There are a lot of people around who aren't at the usual level of average intelligence, it's not exactly a remote possibility.

This.