To find this effing unbelieveable **MNHQ adding content warning for CSA**

[Imnotafemistbut]

A man has raped a child and walks free from court as the judge appears to blame the child.

courtnewsuk.co.uk/rapist-walks-free-after-judge-says-12-year-old-was-sexualised/

[quote Porcupineintherough]@aristotlesdeathray not sheltered at all, I used to volunteer with an outreach project for sex workers, many of whom were teens. Yes in some ways they come across as older than their years but mostly they came across as damaged and traumatised children. Their experience made them more vulnerable, not less, and it showed in all sorts of ways. Not one that I ever met could pass as an adult to anybody taking more than the most superficial interest in them. Not that their clients ever did of course.[/quote]
Because you knew they were children

Christ almighty

I didn't read that report as the judge blaming the child. She just said that the child's behaviour was part of the reason the offender thought she was 16. Given he's already served time on remand the sentence seems fair - at the lighter end of fair, but not excessively lenient.

[quote Porcupineintherough]@emuloc no they are not. How many 12 year olds with the conversational abilities of an adult do you know?[/quote]
But you're an adult looking fro adult conversational skills. He was a teenager who was immature looking at the fact she was happy to have sex, appeared to have her own place and expecting the conversational skills of another teenager.

@AlDanvers

How did she have a car and a house? Have I read that right?

I was wondering that. An older sibling or parent's home and car perhaps? What 12yo can live alone and drive a car? There's a lot more to this story than we are being told.

@londonmummy1966

What worries me even more is that the social care system in this country is so broken that a 12 year old, kicked out of her home, is living in a car. That poor kid, I hate to think how much she has been abused. I hope she is being looked after well now but I don't feel that confident of that.

He was living in the car after arguments with his morally strict parents. It's unclear of her situation but she was passing off both a car and home as hers

I can absolutely believe there are girls 2 months shy of their 13th birthday who are able to pass for 16+, especially to dim-witted (implied by the judge) 20 years looking for a shag on Tinder. Maybe I'm naive but I would not expect to find a 12 year old on Tinder so I have to assume he didn't either.

I can see nothing in the judge's comments that indicate she was blaming the victim. Poor girl must have been let down by a lot of people in her life for things to come to this.

@Lipsandlashes

How on earth did a 12 year old have a car and a 'place to live'? This story is so confusing.

She presumably didn't. She lied Photos of her in her Dad's car, photos of her parents house etc.

I bloody hate this kind of reporting. 'Repeatedly raped' means that legally he raped a child who had passed herself off as an adult on an adult site and who presented as an adult when he met her, one who appeared fully consensual.

And it's naive to say 12 year olds can't pass as adults. I did at 12, all the time. When I had full war paint on, bus drivers never believed I was a child fare.

So a 12 year old is on Tinder and it’s all the guys fault for not demanding evidence of her age. My niece at 11 was found to be getting into clubs! My brother caught her out and couldn’t believe it was her. She is very mature for her age so I can believe that there are young girls who can pass for an older age. Factor in the fact this guy is looking on an adult dating app not trying to groom someone, I can see how the judge came to this conclusion. It’s rape because of her age. Anyone with sons needs to make sure they’ve asked for ID before they go anywhere because it’s literally on them to prove everything.

[quote Porcupineintherough]@emuloc no they are not. How many 12 year olds with the conversational abilities of an adult do you know?[/quote]
Again you are presuming that all adults have a certain level of conversational ability. The girl in question could have had more conversational ability, than the man.

yeah the sentencing is very off. I know someone who got 5 years for this and the underage person was underage by a matter of a few months.

I don’t think it’s very fair to call him a child rapist as that would imply intent. If he genuinely had reason to believe she was over sixteen, and it sounds like that would be an easy conclusion to draw, then I suspect he was very immature for his age if he believed her to be of a similar age. I don’t think he’s a rapist who deserves a jail term tbh. The girl went looking for sex, he didn’t coerce her. I was around the same age when I lost my virginity and I certainly wasn’t forced into it either.

Call me a rape apologist if you like, but there are genuine predators out there walking free, I think this lad has learnt a very painful lesson which will follow him for life.

I also want to add that someone further above blamed her parents. My parents couldn’t be to blame. I came from a loving home but I just thought I was older than what I was and hated my parents for trying to force me to be a child when I didn’t feel I was one. Looking back, I understand how young I was but I most definitely felt like I wasn’t as did many of my friends.

@londonmummy1966

What worries me even more is that the social care system in this country is so broken that a 12 year old, kicked out of her home, is living in a car. That poor kid, I hate to think how much she has been abused. I hope she is being looked after well now but I don't feel that confident of that.

The 12 year old wasnt living in a car. The accused was.

At 12, I would have easily passed for 16/17/18. I had large boobs, I was tall, bright and mature. If I had wanted to pretend I was 18, then I could have done it with ease. Luckily, I came from a good home, with supportive open parents, and went to a great school. Some girls (this girl included) would not have been so lucky.

How on earth did a 12 year old have a car and a 'place to live'?

Apparently she was living in a car, having been chucked out of her home, as opposed to driving it round with a licence

Glad I'm not the only one who noticed the judge is female though ...

The 12 year old wasnt living in a car. The accused was

Ah - apologies if I got that wrong then, but I could have sworn I read it was the girl herself (will try to find it again ...)

@Puzzledandpissedoff

How on earth did a 12 year old have a car and a 'place to live'?

Apparently she was living in a car, having been chucked out of her home, as opposed to driving it round with a licence

Glad I'm not the only one who noticed the judge is female though ...

No she didn't.

He was living in a car. He was kicked out.

The op of this either didn't read the story or started this for other reasons.

Because I can't see anywhere where the judge appears to blame the child at all.

I think there is a substantial difference between acknowledging the specific circumstances in which a young man mistakenly believed the girl he met was older than she was - and had no desire or intent to abuse a child - and victim-blaming or enabling a predator. Unfortunately some newspapers love making clickbait out of complicated and unusual cases.

Useless judge. Wonder what's on his laptop.

OK. Her laptop.

There's no victim blaming.

As a pp said, referring to the child as sexualised is a statement of fact. The average 12 year old might be on social media, Tiktok, Insta etc. Not on Tinder actively looking for sex.

The Defendant spent 7 months in custody, given that and the prevailing circumstances a community order seems entirely appropriate. Had he been white and middle class he almost certainly would have been on bail for 7 months not on remand.

@BellaElla99

I can believe this. My friends and I definitely looked around 16-17 when we were 12-13. We had all had sex and would always be chatted up in london by guys who were 16-22. We used to find it really fun driving around with these older boys smoking and drinking, I guess it made us feel older and we were looking for attention. We would lie about our ages to get free lifts often in return for sexual favours. My friends mum was a single mum working really long hours so we often had the flat to ourselves and would invite guys around to drink/smoke with us. It’s so sad thinking back to how we used to be but I don’t think any of the guys that we did have sex with and lie about our ages to could have been to blame. We were all tall, very well developed and unfortunately thought having sex would get us free alcohol etc and make us more grown up. Hopefully the girl will receive some support from the sexual exploitation teams and social services to help her with this but I do not feel it is victim blaming. I had lots of support from social services during this time of my life and I wouldn’t have wanted any of the men I slept with to go to prison for it.

@BellaElla99 - same we looked about 18 when we were 12-13 upwards and though I didn't lose my virginity until I was almost 15 my 2 best friends lost theirs at 12 and 13/14 respectively.

Coupled with one mother who didn't really care and the other who was out all day a lot working plus 'open house policy' it's not surprising what happened. We weren't tall just average heights but had boobs and bums etc and we wanted boyfriends.

Poor girl who did this.

@longwayoff What are you insinuating about the judge? Most on here agree with her rationale, are you accusing us all of having something untoward on our laptops?