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AIBU?

To find this effing unbelieveable **MNHQ adding content warning for CSA**

216 replies

Imnotafemistbut · 25/01/2022 13:12

A man has raped a child and walks free from court as the judge appears to blame the child.

courtnewsuk.co.uk/rapist-walks-free-after-judge-says-12-year-old-was-sexualised/

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

350 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
17%
You are NOT being unreasonable
83%
aristotlesdeathray · 25/01/2022 15:01

@longwayoff

Useless judge. Wonder what's on his laptop.

Confused
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PippaPotter · 25/01/2022 15:03

@Imnotafemistbut I assumed that I'd be addressing adults.

What a dick thing to say. This forum is full of rape victims, women who experienced abuse as children, survivors of violence at the hands of men. Women who deserve a fucking trigger warning and don’t need to be told that they are adults so they should just deal with it. Ffs.

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astoundedgoat · 25/01/2022 15:05

[quote Porcupineintherough]@emuloc no they are not. How many 12 year olds with the conversational abilities of an adult do you know?[/quote]
None, but the people who have interviewed the man are all agreed that he is very immature for his age.

His own eloquence in conversation might not be much beyond that of the child herself. If they were just talking about computer games, hanging out with friends, going to the park/shopping centre there might not have been much noticeable difference that he could see.

She pretty clearly HAS been groomed and abused, though, if not (intentionally) by this man, and hopefully is now safe. His involvement is not blameless, but I think she has encountered some pretty evil men already. Hopefully the focus will now be on bringing them to justice. The poor poor child.

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AlDanvers · 25/01/2022 15:10

@longwayoff

Useless judge. Wonder what's on his laptop.

That makes no sense. The defendant was looked into and no evidence of him being a paedophile was found.

What do you think they would find that would make the judge want to give him a lighter sentence?
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alexdgr8 · 25/01/2022 15:10

i heard on the radio that there are organised crime gangs in romania who are grooming children aged 8, as part of a production line to bring them to uk aged 12 to work as prostitutes.
we don't know the background of this case.
maybe she was trafficked and went awol.

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 25/01/2022 15:11

The people who have interviewed the man are all agreed that he is very immature for his age

Hence no doubt the 48 "maturity sessions" which have reportedly been arranged

Two things occur to me ... firstly what the chances are of him actually attending them, and secondly what message he'll take away from all this, beyond believing that all he has to do in future is swear "I thought she was 16"

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Cantleave · 25/01/2022 15:11

@ABCeasyasdohrayme

There really is no end to the blame of women and girls for our own rapes and assaults.

There is no way this man thought that a 12 year old was an adult, absolutely no way, 'immature' or not.

I agree with this, but it seems that a lot of other posters don’t, and actually think that his sentencing was appropriate! Bloody hell, talk about “victim blaming!”

What sort of World do we live in, that 12 year old children are deemed mature enough to pass for over 16?
Doesn’t help either, that the Judge was a female!
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aristotlesdeathray · 25/01/2022 15:14

@Cantleave

So you think it's impossible that there are any 12, nearly 13 year olds out there that can pass for 16?

Bullshit

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aristotlesdeathray · 25/01/2022 15:14

@Puzzledandpissedoff

The people who have interviewed the man are all agreed that he is very immature for his age

Hence no doubt the 48 "maturity sessions" which have reportedly been arranged

Two things occur to me ... firstly what the chances are of him actually attending them, and secondly what message he'll take away from all this, beyond believing that all he has to do in future is swear "I thought she was 16"

Attending the sessions are a condition of his suspended sentence

So your view he won't attend them is a bit pointless
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CorrBlimeyGG · 25/01/2022 15:15

What sort of World do we live in, that 12 year old children are deemed mature enough to pass for over 16?

That would be the real world. It has been the case for years. It's not victim blaming to remember being that age, and acknowledging our own situations and maturity.

Each case needs to be judged according to the individuals involved. There's so much wrong with the background to this case, the sentence is not one of those things.

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Puzzledandpissedoff · 25/01/2022 15:24

Attending the sessions are a condition of his suspended sentence

I'm aware of that, aristotle, but wouldn't quite say it was pointless to wonder what'll happen if he doesn't attend them - even allowing for what's supposed to follow

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aristotlesdeathray · 25/01/2022 15:25

@Puzzledandpissedoff

Attending the sessions are a condition of his suspended sentence

I'm aware of that, aristotle, but wouldn't quite say it was pointless to wonder what'll happen if he doesn't attend them - even allowing for what's supposed to follow

You think people regularly don't follow strict conditions of suspended sentences and nothing happens to them?

Confused
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StellaGibs · 25/01/2022 15:26

@Imnotafemistbut

I assumed that I'd be addressing adults.

How can you post this then follow with such a callous response?!
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longwayoff · 25/01/2022 15:32

I thought we'd heard the last of blaming the child for the adult's actions after Rochdale. Evidently not. 12 YEARS OLD. Ffs. And he's immature for his age? What? That balances things out?

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skodadoda · 25/01/2022 15:33

@spikesonbuildings

At first I thought this was victim blaming shite, like people come out with when they read Lolita, but having read the article it appears the Judge accepted that he genuinely did not realise her age. It says she had her own car and place to live and presented herself as an adult on the dating app.
The Judge also acknowledges this girl is vulnerable. But her judgement was based on her believing he did not realise her age.
She was almost 13 and some girls that age do look like adults. She is obviously a troubled child, but this does not appear to be a case of an older man knowingly taking advantage of a child.

I’m inclined to agree with this
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VanGoghsDog · 25/01/2022 15:34

@aristotlesdeathray

Well on an app for adults it's odd to think anyone should ID their dates

So I can fully understand and agree with this ruling

What????
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Puzzledandpissedoff · 25/01/2022 15:35

You think people regularly don't follow strict conditions of suspended sentences and nothing happens to them?

Sorry, but while I obviously can't speak for them all, I've known too many who've experienced exactly that
Nobody denies that a framework for dealng with this supposedly exists, but by the time "lack of resources / nobody in post" and "the attendee's ill / needs family time / is anxious" have been allowed for, the chances of anything actually being done are a lot slimmer than we might like

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Dixiechickonhols · 25/01/2022 15:36

It does seem a lenient sentence on headlines but the dm story has more information. It’s rape as she was 2 months off 13 so unable to consent and he has pleaded guilty.
He has served a custodial sentence of 7 months now given community and therapy sentence.
It seems unbelievable a 19 year old could mistake a 12 year for 16 but that seems to be the accepted facts of this case. He was described as very immature by professionals. She was on tinder. There was no coercion or grooming. They will have reviewed their phone exchanges and the cctv was considered. It appears they interacted as a teen couple on a tinder hook up but he was rightly charged as she was 12. If she was 13 then he probably would have avoided conviction on the basis he had reasonable belief she was 16.
It’s an unusual case but the judge sentenced on all the information.

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SheldonesqueTheBstard · 25/01/2022 15:39

“I assumed that I'd be addressing adults”

Shameful.

Considering the subject matter, I would now have to question what you actually wanted from this thread.

Were you hoping for some to share their life experiences?

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VanGoghsDog · 25/01/2022 15:39

@longwayoff

Useless judge. Wonder what's on his laptop.

What do you think might be on it?
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SamphiretheStickerist · 25/01/2022 15:42

I can't see what else the judge could have done.

He was found guilty, pled guilty, because he had actually had sex with a minor.

But the situation wasn't that straight forward and the judgement reflected his lack of intent and knowledge.

Save your ire for whomever it was that sexualised the girl, didn't seem to miss her as she was trundling round in his car. Where were the adults in her life?

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aristotlesdeathray · 25/01/2022 15:43

@longwayoff

I thought we'd heard the last of blaming the child for the adult's actions after Rochdale. Evidently not. 12 YEARS OLD. Ffs. And he's immature for his age? What? That balances things out?

Did you bother to read into the case or just decided to show yourself for a fool for nothing?
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astoundedgoat · 25/01/2022 15:43

@longwayoff

I thought we'd heard the last of blaming the child for the adult's actions after Rochdale. Evidently not. 12 YEARS OLD. Ffs. And he's immature for his age? What? That balances things out?

I didn't interpret it as blaming her. She was sexualised, which I read as being passive - i.e. sexualisation had been done to her, i.e. through previous abuse, and she was now behaving in a traumatised manner.

I'm sure anybody working in social work or child protection has seen this kind of behaviour before. I don't think the judge was saying it was the child's FAULT.

Grammatically it would have been better to say "the victim had been sexualised" than "the victim was sexualised".
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Dixiechickonhols · 25/01/2022 15:43

This is a similar Scottish case where 19 year old received no punishment for rape of 12 year old. The judge set out carefully reason for sentencing knowing there would be backlash.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-39305042

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Flowers500 · 25/01/2022 15:44

People who are implying that a judge may be a pedophile should seriously consider whether they would like to be sued for defamation. Posts like these are a breach of the law and actionable.

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