To ask how long you were together before you got married?

[MeSanniesareBrannies]

How long were you in a relationship before you got engaged/married? I was with DP for almost three years when we got engaged, when we get married, we’ll have been together almost four. Speaking to acquaintances (not close friends) it seems like that’s unusual and we’ve been hasty. A work colleague was particularly taken aback and informed me that ‘short engagements are a recipe for disaster’. I thought this was a bit bizarre!

I’m unworried about my relationship, but I’m intrigued…what’s everyone else’s norm?

We’re early 30’s professionals in London, postgrad education, good jobs, good pay, no prior marriages or kids. I think that for our demographic 3-5 years is pretty standard, but happy to be told I’m wrong.

We were together for 4 years before marriage, living together for 3. Engagement was 3 weeks, but we got married because we needed the piece of paper for immigration purposes. Didn’t intend marrying at all until that happened. still together another 26 years on.

Engaged within 6mths
Bought house in 14mths
Married 3 years
Child 5 years
Married 15 years this year

We were in our early 30s and both had failed relationships but everything felt right with him. Engaged after 4 months, married at 12 months. Still extremely happy together 11 years and two children later.

Met in 1990
Engaged 1991
Married 2000
Still together

So a 9 year engagement - in that time brought a house together and had a child, got married then had another child

I think by your early-30's you have a pretty good idea of what you want in a partner so you're hardly rushing it.

DH and I net in our 20's and were together for 2.5 years before getting engaged, married about four months later. There was no reason to faff around planning the wedding, we could only afford a small one so we thought we'd get on with it. Married over 20 years now and we don't regret it.

Like a PP, my parents were v. quick. Engaged six weeks after meeting, married six weeks later. They were also in their early 30's and had both been engaged before (and had broken those engagements off). I suppose they just knew it was right when they met!

Met to engagement - 4 weeks
Engagement to wedding - 7 months
So 8 months total

Been married 28 years

• Moved in after 3 months together
• Engaged and bought a house after 1 year together
• Married and pregnant with first child after 2 years together

We're now 7 years in with 2 children and we're still very much in love.

I honestly don't think it matters how quickly/slowly it takes to get married (if that's what you want from the relationship).
As long as you do what's right for you both, that's all that matters and I wouldn't acknowledge any criticism.

Engaged after 4.5years. Married 4 years after that. Mortgage and Children first. We were 20 when we got together, so no rush.

Together 11 years before getting married 😂 We got together in our late teens and only got married to make everything official after DD was born. If we hadn’t have had children we wouldn’t have bothered with marriage.

This year will be 16 years total

@CandyMan89

Engaged after 4.5years. Married 4 years after that. Mortgage and Children first. We were 20 when we got together, so no rush.

BTW we are 12 years in and still perfect. ❤

Met in 92,
started dating in 94,
engaged 97 (bought house)
married 98
Still together. I thought we took a while, but we're at uni and then started jobs before buying a house in 97. (I had a ds from previous relationship - legally adopted by dh)

Got together aged 27/28
Engaged after 3 and a bit years
Married just over a year later

Engaged after 2 years.. still not married!! We have been together just over 6 years and had our first child a year ago. We keep meaning to plan a wedding but then we bought a house, then a very expensive holiday, then a new garden.. car etc.

We ARE doing it soon! Just probably a few more holidays first..

Engaged after 6 months, married after 2 years, celebrating 36 years soon

Engaged after 3 weeks, married 5years later.

Together just over 1.5 years before we got engaged (both aged 19), married a year later, so 2.5 years together (aged 20). We'll have been married 13 years this year. No kids.

Together 4 years before he proposed and got married 5 months later and celebrating 22 years married in a few months time.

8 months together when we got engaged, one year together when we got married. I was 37, he was 39. We've just had our 15th wedding anniversary.

Together 6 months when we got engaged, married after 2.5 years, would have been a year earlier if it wasn't for covid. Been married 2 years now. Im 30 x

I’m surprised by how many people were together for a few months (or weeks) before you got engaged. I’m super happy it worked out for you all. I suppose it just goes to show that there’s no one size fits all ‘right’ way to do things!

Lots of happy marriages on this thread. Lovely to see on MN! And heartening for me, as someone who is about to get married! 💗

Engaged after 3 months, married 5 months after that. 39 years so far and counting...

I think we'd been together for 4 months when we got engaged, and together 18 months when we got married, both in our early twenties.

It sounds mad to me now but we were at a point in life where we were both planning our futures and decided to go for it and build a life together rather than build separate lives and hope we could merge them later on. We did wait a few years before starting a family though. We've been together for 14 years now and I have no regrets. I hope DH would say the same!

2 yrs, lived together for 1.5 of those years....we weren't messing around

I'll add we've been married for 12yrs now

I met my husband October 95, Pregnant within 1 month, married May 96, 1st baby born July 96.
We have been married 26 years this coming May and have 6 children now aged 25,24,22,21,19 and 17.