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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DB wants half his ex's house

255 replies

username103842 · 14/01/2022 16:38

DB was with his partner for the last 6 years. She has been very successful career wise and earns a high salary and had her own house before they met. Despite working himself (he earns about half what his ex does) he just moved in and did not pay a single bill in the whole 6 years. He did buy some furniture occasionally but other than that she paid for everything.

She split up with him a few month ago and he is now back at our parents house. He could rent his own place but it has dawned after all his bills he wouldn't have much left. He actually would have more than many I think he is so use to have his whole wage he has got a shock.

Anyway with encouragement of my parents he has decided he is going to see a solicitor to get half of her house Confused. I don't have a clue of the legalities and doubt he will get anywhere. I try not to get involved in it all but I'm getting daily phones calls from him and my parents about it. Which is driving me mad so I have stopped answering most of them.

I know this isn't actually any of my business so please don't start with them comments. I feel like I am forced to be involved when I actually want to say it's wrong. I suppose the only reason I am asking AIBU to think that way is when you thinking of other situations like when a cohabiting couple have children and the mother doesn't work/contribute financial to the house. I certainly wouldn't feel the same in that circumstance.

OP posts:
Petlover9 · 17/01/2022 14:47

@ZoeTheThornyDevil

He thinks he's going to get legal aid for this "claim"?!?

Hahahaha! That's adorable. I would sit back with popcorn on hand, tbh.

There is hardly any Legal Aid unless you murder someone, I know because I have a friend with massive service charges on a very modest Leasehold Flat and she is a pensioner and cannot get any legal help. So this jerk needs a reality check. I would warn the lady though so she can be ready with a sharp reply. I agree with not answering your phone to your family
BashStreetKid · 17/01/2022 23:29

The constant phone calls are to ask me to look it up on line or find a solicitor or how to claim legal aid. I recently told them I'm too busy. Their tone changed and I haven't heard from them since.

Why can't he do that? If he spent a bit of time on Google he could look up legal aid eligibility for himself (and discover he's not going to get legal aid)

RockinHorseShit · 17/01/2022 23:35

He'll get nowhere

An ex of mine tried this, it's not uncommon from entitled men. He got zilchGrin

But YADNBU to feel the way you do, you have better morals than your DB & right now they clash.

TheFormidableMrsC · 18/01/2022 12:58

@username103842

I didn't expect so many replies!!

To try and answer some of the general questions...
It all started from a ridiculous conversation he had with a friend. The friends tells him a story about 'a friend of a friend getting half the house...' it's either probably nonsense or half a story. So now he is convinced he is entitled. He has no savings whatsoever and also thinks due to said friend he will be able to claim legal aid.
The constant phone calls are to ask me to look it up on line or find a solicitor or how to claim legal aid. I recently told them I'm too busy. Their tone changed and I haven't heard from them since.
A PP wrote about my parents enabling behaviour that is definitely true. My DB plays the victim constantly. He was completely the victim in this break up ( I don't actually even know why they split). He and my parents somehow blames his ex for him suffering financially now Confused. They can't seem to see the fact he has 6 years with no bills and could have saved a fortune!

If they ask again I think you need to be absolutely clear that he hasn't got a hope in hell of securing legal aid. Not a chance. Send him to the CAB if you must and they will put him straight.
TheHumanExperience · 19/01/2022 21:58

@Lubeyboobyalt

He won't get anywhere near half - I was in a similar situation with my ex and the settlement was 5k, only then because of contribution to diy and decor
He'll pay way more in 5k trying to claim what is not his. Maybe it would be a good lesson for him, owing tens of thousands of pounds. Then he will have to stay rent free and scrounge of someone else.
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