Do parents not pay for weddings these days??

[justasking111]

I'm thinking we're a bit behind the times in Wales because we still pay as parents for weddings, now it's money dependant, finances allowing as to how much hoopla there is.

I find it sad whenever folks on here talk of saving up for their own wedding

Am I being unreasonable to think it's the final gift to your child??

I live in England and my parents didn’t pay for my wedding, that was 25 years ago.

For many people now this would be considered an enormous luxury to be able to afford to pay for children's weddings.

Realistically a large number of people in this country are struggling to pay for necessities like energy bills, food, rent or childcare costs.

It is kind of a bit unfair as so much money is sitting in the older generations, due to large increases in property prices!

I’m going to a wedding in Wales this spring and the couple are mostly paying for it themselves with contributions from both families, same as just about every other wedding I’ve been to excluding those where the couple come from extremely wealthy families so there’s no saving up involved.

We paid part and part when I got married - exh and I paid some, my parents paid some and his parents paid some.

Lots of people will use a parental gift alongside their own savings.

Lots of people don’t want the strings that come with parental money.

With people getting married later the idea of a family hosting the party feels increasingly odd.

Lots of parents don’t have deep pockets.

Lots of parents would rather help with house deposits or childcare.

It’s all just a bit old fashioned?

It's hardly a final gift for your child!

After marriage my parents gifted us with plenty of childcare, trips away, Christmas and birthday presents and one day, long time from now (hopefully) an inheritance.

My parents contributed to the wedding as they knew we didn't have much money so saving up would be difficult and they had money to spare. If they had of been on the bones of their arse too I wouldn't have taken a penny off them. They didn't choose for us to get married. We chose to do that.

These days it's more common to pay for your own.

Back when it was common weddings cost only a fraction of what they do today

This is interesting.

www.weddingideasmag.com/wedding-costs-decades/amp/

In my culture, the wedding are jointly paid for by both the couple and their families.

I think it’s unfair to expect parents to foot the bills for weddings when so many of them have turned into such extravagant affairs nowadays!!

No and I’d never expect them to. I think it’s still pretty common in some cultures but isn’t mainstream for most.

All parents in Wales pay for weddings? Is there a law? Does it apply to 2nd / 3rd marriages or just the first one? If parents can't afford it, does their child never get to get married? If they move to England to try to avoid paying, do they get hunted down?

Or are you making a wild and inaccurate generalisation?

My parents and MIL gave us a couple of grand towards the wedding, but we paid for most of it ourselves.

Traditionally the parents would organise and pay for the wedding. The invitation would be from the parents inviting you to the wedding of their child. Nowadays couples tend to pay for their own wedding and the invitation is from the bride and groom.

In Scotland and the in laws gave us a gift of money towards it. My family couldn't afford so helped us in more practical ways instead. We saved up for our wedding.

This one's American

Crikey!

www.buzzfeed.com/megkeene/heres-what-my-parents-1974-wedding-would-cost-in-2017

People now get married later so they tend to have their own money.

How does it work if a Welsh person marries someone who isn’t Welsh?

I think if a couple get married relatively young then it is still common for parents to pay. But if they have been living independently for several years, maybe they have already bought a house together or have children then getting your parents to pay for your wedding seems a bit strange.

Also if your parents are paying they get a massive say in what you do. My parents pretty much wrote my guest list for me.

I paid for my own wedding 35 years ago, my parents had no money anyway. We contributed to our daughter's wedding, about a third, as their joint income is twice ours and we don't have massive savings. Weddings nowadays are much more costly affairs than they were when we married. Yabu

My parents gave us a token gift of a couple of thousand, we paid for the rest ( they do tell anyone who hears that they paid for our wedding which pisses me off and they genuinely believe that they did) 🤬

I'll have been married 25 years this year, and even back then parents mostly contributed a sum towards the wedding rather than paying for it. Of my friends, only one had their dad pay for it in all, and he certainly extracted his pound of flesh in making decisions

Not a trend in my area of Wales at all!

Parents in my circles typically give a gift, my sister is getting married and my mum is paying for her dress (up to a certain figure!) and my dad is paying for one bill, I think for my sister it will be her photgrapher.

Don’t know anyone who had their entire wedding paid for by parents.

@LordEmsworth

All parents in Wales pay for weddings? Is there a law? Does it apply to 2nd / 3rd marriages or just the first one? If parents can't afford it, does their child never get to get married? If they move to England to try to avoid paying, do they get hunted down?

Or are you making a wild and inaccurate generalisation?

I’m welsh and haven’t even heard of a single wedding where the parents have paid.

I think most parents are more concerned with helping their children through uni these days. My parents didn't pay for my wedding, tbh I wouldn't have wanted them to as I would have probably felt pressure to please them in terms of location/who to invite etc.