Ireland . Tonight . A woman beaten to death in broad daylight

[goodyear2021]

I know this is predominantly
A UK site but I am so full of rage .
Beautiful young girl. 23 year old teacher went for a run at 4pm beaten to death.yesterday afternoon .
What can we do to stop this relaxed attitude to violence against women. We are all hurting here.
AIBU to think that violence against some. Women ever ever be fucking taken seriously .
110 convictions and out on bail murder Ed Ashling on a run way called after another woman who was brutally murdered there.
I'm full
Of sadness and fucking rage . I'm
Done with this shit for our girls.

@Alondra

*Beautiful young girl. 23 year old teacher went for a run at 4pm beaten to death.yesterday afternoon . What can we do to stop this relaxed attitude to violence against women*

WE can do little. Our democracies are supposedly based on the separation of powers, unfortunately they are run by men.

We can rage and scream and nothing is going to change. Change needs to come from within societies and enough women being pissed off to have enough. Until then we rage.

There are women in politics around the globe, inc in the UK, we ve had 2 female PM's and at least 2 female Home secretaries, a woman was head of the supreme court and plenty of women on here turned on her....

We have a non rehabilative prison system, terrible MH provision (my DD did a placement in a med sec MH unit, its a merry go round, due to little community support)
We have slashed domestic abuse refuge's, cut spending on justice system so we now have all time low rape convictions and victims wait years for trial dates.
We've slashed Police numbers and closed to the public almost ALL police stations.

I asked my DD "Do u ever see any Police when out running?" no never was the answer.

The tragedy is we have all voted for this.

This is just horrific. I'm sat here waiting for it to lighten up a bit before I go for a run. Then my day will be spent worrying about and supporting a neighbour and friend I have just discovered is being physically and mentally abused by her husband. I'm terrified he will have hurt her again last night but can't text to check in until I know he's left for work. Obviously he checks her phone .

We just have to keep bringing up our sons to respect women. I just don't know what else we can do other than campaign for better sentencing, lighting, protection and police.

*There are women in politics around the globe, inc in the UK, we ve had 2 female PM's and at least 2 female Home secretaries, a woman was head of the supreme court and plenty of women on here turned on her....

We have a non rehabilative prison system, terrible MH provision (my DD did a placement in a med sec MH unit, its a merry go round, due to little community support)
We have slashed domestic abuse refuge's, cut spending on justice system so we now have all time low rape convictions and victims wait years for trial dates.
We've slashed Police numbers and closed to the public almost ALL police stations.

I asked my DD "Do u ever see any Police when out running?" no never was the answer.

The tragedy is we have all voted for this*

It's not about slashing police numbers, police are institutionally corrupt against women. We can have a female PM, we can have 2-6 female ministers.....and nothing changes because how our countries are run INSTITUTIONALLY is by men. A female PM can try to change the male culture and she will run against a brick wall - public service, corporations, judges and press will crucify her if she steps too much out of line.

Until we women seriously think of organising ourselves politically against the male culture in our countries - doesn't matter if it is the UK, Australia, Germany etc, we will continue to rage but nothing will change.

@Alexandra2001 makes really important and relevant points. We should all reflect on them.

Agreed. And this thread demonstrates that even on Mumsnet, some women have a low bar for male behaviour and, in instances of male violent crime to women, immediately jump to what women should or shouldn't be doing to avoid being killed

I’m the mum of a 24 year old Teacher and I cannot bear to read this. My sincerest condolences to Ashling’s family. May she rest in peace.

It’s just abominable. Utterly abominable.

Too many young men are being brought up on a diet of hardcore pornography, then acting out their misogynistic fantasies on women.

The bastards should all rot in jail for good.

It's not about slashing police numbers, police are institutionally corrupt against women. We can have a female PM, we can have 2-6 female ministers.....and nothing changes because how our countries are run INSTITUTIONALLY is by men. A female PM can try to change the male culture and she will run against a brick wall - public service, corporations, judges and press will crucify her if she steps too much out of line

Women supporting cuts to vital Police, justice and women's services are nothing to do with a "male culture"

More to do with the fact that someone like May or Patel will never ever have to use a womens refuge or be attacked whilst out running, so they don't care & that would be the case no matter how many women are in power.

Look at the cuts in MH services? who is more likely to be attacked by people who in days past would have been held securely.. men or women?

No, what matters is the quality of the individual... Do they care enough to force through positive change for women?

To me, long term, early interventions are vital.

There’s plenty of minimisation around murders of women. Just yesterday Virgin News we’re describing Aisling’s BRUTAL MURDER as a “fatal assault”

And don’t forget the outcry after the murder of Clodagh Hawe and her three children by her husband Alan. In initial reports they didn’t even bother using her name, they referred to her as “Alan’s wife”. It led to the hashtag #hernamewasClodagh.

Forgot to add the screenshot of the. Irvin News tweet to my last post

Her name is Ashling

Apologies for misspelling her name, I should have double checked first. I have a friend who spells her name without the h so it’s my default, but that’s no excuse for not checking.

#HerNameWasAshling

@honeyrider

The spotlight needs to focus on the judiciary, sentences for violent crimes is far too lenient, so many vicious thugs have double or treble number previous cases yet the revolving door system is failing victims.

It's a gravy train for the judiciary. Legal aid should be capped to one or two times a person is charged so if they re-offend then they pay for legal representation themselves or they're on their own. Limitless free legal aid is an abuse of tax payers money.

Yes I agree. It needs to come from a different angle as clearly the current system is not in favour of the victim. How do we go about getting this done? We have strength in numbers.

Some media have been reporting it as Aisling, including Irish websites. It’s early days I guess but I agree we should spell it right.

The men need to stand up.
When will they?
Men? You there?

The majority of people who commit this kind of crime -murdering a stranger in broad daylight -are psychopaths - possibly circa 1% of the population. Encouraging these people to read some woke articles on the Guardian will probably not do any good. They need to be identified early, monitored as necessary, and then locked up for as long as necessary.

@EishetChayil

For a start, violent porn needs to be made much harder to access.

I agree.

If you speak up about the men who view porn, forward porn you're seen as confusing different issues or blaming poor innocent porn-users of being killers / rapists but it's all contributing to this world we live in where women are just pretending to have lives and careers and responsibilities equal to men's but really, they're just there to be objectified and it's so frustrating to the poor men that they can't just harrass and objectify with as much freedom as they'd enjoy.

Very few men speak out. All the vigils, all the donations to women's aid, all the sponsored walks for women's aid, it's always women. Men just say not all men. that's literally their only contribution, to obfuscate and be defensive.

@CaveMum

Forgot to add the screenshot of the. Irvin News tweet to my last post

''misogyny greenlights killers'' yes, and it greenlights rapists as well.

I think there needs to be a class in school. We have SPHE or whatever it's called, it needs to go deeper in to subject of what behaviour is unacceptable.

On my facebook last night ONE man spoke out about this. ONE. The others are sitting there thinking ''not all men, what about the menz who get killed?''
But good for him.

sorry quoted wrong post.

I am also always sad about how our society works and how women are generally worse off. I think it all has evolved because men are stronger and competitive in their nature, in general. We probably have it better than most in the past 2000 years but still not fair at all.

Absolutely @honeyrider the thoughts of a man getting free legal aid to defend himself against a rape or sexual assualt charge for the third or fourth time, that just BEGGARS BELIEF

As was frequently pointed out on the many threads about Sarah Everard, there is always a string of “minor” offences behind these men.

A vanishingly small number of murders are committed by first time offenders, there will be a history of domestic abuse or sex offences of some description in the perpetrator’s history.

My heart goes out to her family and friends. As well as all of those families and friends of women who are murdered and don't make the news.

We're told not to take risks, not to get drunk, to dress appropriately, to be aware. It's still not enough. I wonder what exactly it is we are supposed to do to "protect ourselves" when Sarah Everard was just walking home, Sabina Nessa was just walking to meet a friend, Sukhjeet Uppal was in her own home when she was stabbed to death, and Ashling Murphy just went for a run. At what point will society accept that placing the responsibility and blame on us as women is wrong, and that actually it's the men - and it is almost always men - who are at fault and need to be held responsible?

Instead of women being told not to walk after dark, why not tell men they can't go out? What will it take, because even in broad daylight, in well lit areas, in busy streets and in our own homes we aren't safe?

@immersivereader

The men need to stand up.

When will they?

Men? You there?

What should they actually do though? Like many things it probably needs spelling out to them. Telling them to "stand up" is an empty gesture, you need to explain to them how their actions (individually) contributed to this murder. A great number of men, probably the majority, will never murder a woman. They genuinely don't understand how they can prevent a murder by someone they don't know, of someone they don't know, at a place they've never been to.