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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have never really done the school run?

266 replies

Veeveeoxox · 12/01/2022 15:16

DD is 8 and in Year 4 for the first time in a long time I am picking her up directly from school. She goes to breakfast club at the local nursery and then after school club they pick her up and drop her off. I love it as there's no waiting for the teacher and no parents there either, my social anxiety loves it. Even if I'm off work I still take her to breakfast club and after-school club I just pick her up earlier. Does anyone else do this just because they loathe the school run ? Grin

OP posts:
Wowyouareboring · 13/01/2022 17:48

Selfish !

CatsnCoffee · 13/01/2022 18:07

I totally get it!

CatsnCoffee · 13/01/2022 18:10

@Doggydoodah123
I totally get it!

Hertsgirl10 · 13/01/2022 18:25

@EishetChayil

Honest question, as I'm not at this stage yet, but what is so anxiety-inducing about the school run?
@EishetChayil

Absolutely nothing… I really do not understand the big song and dance about it all, seems like the last sort of 8-10 years people decided they don’t like the school run so say ‘social anxiety’ I don’t know how these people get through life if standing in a public place for 4 minutes is so excruciating I mean do these people just never leave their houses? Never go shopping or anywhere at all.

Not one person gives a shit about any other mum at the school, everyone’s picking their kids up, not looking at anyone else or their kids it’s just something that you do, like going to the shop, gym or answering the door to an Amazon delivery driver.

I know someone that has social anxiety but doesn’t affect the nursery or school runs at all, I mean she wears headphones and gets on with it.

Hertsgirl10 · 13/01/2022 18:33

Hmmm yes anti social till it’s something that interest them 😂
School runs are boring so it’s that isn’t it, let’s be honest here …

Supergirl1958 · 13/01/2022 18:39

I'm a teacher so I'm unlikely to ever do the school run :( I think YABU as I feel sad that I will probably never pick my little boy up from sxhool

Supergirl1958 · 13/01/2022 18:40

*school

Owl55 · 13/01/2022 18:42

I know people need to use breakfast clubs and link clubs after school but I do feel sorry for the children. I worked in a school and some children did this from age 4-11 and many were fed up , their faces lit up when a parent collected them unexpectedly in person . Please try and overcome your anxiety to collect your child sometimes x

Justgettingbye · 13/01/2022 18:48

I don't love it and there are cliques but I wouldn't like to keep my child in school just because of me

Justgettingbye · 13/01/2022 18:49

And cost at my school after school club is £7.50 and breakfast club is £3.00 it all adds up

maybloss2 · 13/01/2022 18:52

I’ve never really had a problem with school runs as a parent. As a teacher I’d get p off with parents double parking outside the school, shouting down their mobile phones& ignoring their child, letting other peoples kids out of the school unaccompanied (thereby causing major incidents as child goes missing on busy main road) and on one memorable occasion throwing the child’s belongings at a member of staff all the while shouting I’m fed up with this little fucker!🤷‍♂️
So I can quite understand if you have even one unpleasant parent to ‘deal’ with everyday why you’d want to avoid it.

TildaRae · 13/01/2022 18:53

My son started school in September. I’ve never done a ‘school run’ he goes to breakfast club 5 days a week and after school club 3 days a week, the other 2 days my mum collects him.

We have a class WhatsApp group so I don’t miss anything major. I wouldn’t be able to place most of the names with faces!

ilovechocolate07 · 13/01/2022 19:09

I can guarantee that your child will be so excited to be picked up from the classroom by you. The children at school always share who is picking up especially if it's a working parent who doesn't usually get the chance. I think you will be inspired to do it more by the look on their face when they see you.

LibrariesGiveUsPower · 13/01/2022 19:33

@Huy456

I feel so sad for people who get worked up about the school run. I promise no one is looking at you pr judging you, everyone generally is in their own head. I really doubt any dads have ever felt school run anxiety
Haha, they definitely are judging and looking and gossiping at our school. But only one or two. Everyone else is normal and couldn’t care less.
Yourcatisnotsorry · 13/01/2022 20:44

I think it’s super sad to send your child to asc and miss out on time with them if it’s just to avoid the school run. Obviously if you need the childcare for work etc or your little one loves the club great but if it’s just to avoid school pick up I would advise getting some mental health help as it’s not a proportionate response.

MajorCarolDanvers · 13/01/2022 20:52

Please stop feeling sorry for children who go to after school club.

How rude can you get - or are you just trying to make people who use them (for whatever reason) feel shit.

As said earlier on the thread it's a big play date not an orphanage.

Momicrone · 13/01/2022 20:54

My kids didn't see it as a big play date, they thought it was boring, maybe some clubs are better than others

Woofwoofbarkbark · 13/01/2022 20:55

They only feel sorry for the ones who have to go because their parents don't like spending 5 minutes in a play ground on their day off. Not the ones who go so their parents can pay the rent.
It is a bit sad. Having children got me out of my anxiety ridden state. I realised I couldn't have anxiety and children. And I couldn't just give my children away!!

MajorCarolDanvers · 13/01/2022 20:58

You know the kids have the same experience at a club irrespective of the reason they are there so it's fairly obnoxious to 'feel sorry' for them.

Woofwoofbarkbark · 13/01/2022 21:04

It's not. If I found out my mum never picked me up from school and enjoyed an extra hour of my company because she didn't enjoy standing still outside quietly for 5 minutes I'd feel pretty shit.

HikingforScenery · 13/01/2022 21:11

@Woofwoofbarkbark

They only feel sorry for the ones who have to go because their parents don't like spending 5 minutes in a play ground on their day off. Not the ones who go so their parents can pay the rent. It is a bit sad. Having children got me out of my anxiety ridden state. I realised I couldn't have anxiety and children. And I couldn't just give my children away!!
Why? They’re all in the same place doing the same things. Some children are lucked up from school and then are stuck in front of the tv/iPad, with minimum interaction until dinner and then bed. Just because parents pick a child up early doesn’t mean they’re better parents or that the child has a better life, you know.
HikingforScenery · 13/01/2022 21:12

@Woofwoofbarkbark

It's not. If I found out my mum never picked me up from school and enjoyed an extra hour of my company because she didn't enjoy standing still outside quietly for 5 minutes I'd feel pretty shit.
If you’d dwell on having a great time spending longer with friends at school.
XelaM · 13/01/2022 21:14

My daughter hated after school club. Nothing fun about it, especially as most kids there were from different year groups. Totally weird not to be able to pick your kid up from school if you're not working

Woofwoofbarkbark · 13/01/2022 21:19

Why? They’re all in the same place doing the same things.
Some children are lucked up from school and then are stuck in front of the tv/iPad, with minimum interaction until dinner and then bed.
Just because parents pick a child up early doesn’t mean they’re better parents or that the child has a better life, you know.

I love the, you know, at the end. No, I had no idea. I thought all kids were so well cared for? Don't be so silly. My opinion is that it's nice to spend time with my kids after school and I think it's sad that other parents Don't. I'm sure people think it's sad that I would spend so much time with my kids and not working. No offence needs to be taken.

floss1 · 13/01/2022 21:28

If the school run is the biggest worry of your day you’re doing well!
I’ve always enjoyed it and juggled work around to do as many as I can.
I enjoy taking them, picking up and chatting to the other parents.
Make the most of it!