To hate villages?

[AllThePogs]

The gossiping, nosiness, judgement of others - it is all there. And if you don't fit in, then beware.
I say this from experience. A beautiful looking village in East Sussex that some people will see as the dream. Instead, all I experienced was extreme gossip, racism and narrow-mindedness.

I bet a month's salary that the OP, and the 40% agreeing with the OP have never even visited a village, let alone lived in one.

She just wanted an excuse to start a nasty, scathing, bitter, vitriolic thread about people who live in villages, with not a shred of evidence, or any proof to back up anything she is saying.

As other posters have said, I have never been happier (and DH too) since we moved into our lovely little village. Surrounded by fields, woodlands, and meadows, and just 10 minutes walk to the canal and the river. But only 12-13 minutes drive to our closest market town.

We need a car out here, but we needed one when we lived in the suburbs of a big town. We were 10-15 minutes drive to town/the shops, when we lived in the suburbs. And we were 10 minutes walk to a bus stop, with irregular, expensive buses, and GP, dentists, and high schools all an hour on a bus. And there was DH's varying shifts. No WAY could he get public transport even in the town, with his odd shifts.

So we are no worse off, but much better off, as the people are much friendlier, the air is cleaner, the views are spectacular, and the community is lovely.

Like pps, I will never move - EVER. It's like being on holiday 52 weeks of the year.

The OP @AllThePogs sounds bitter and jealous. Don't know why. Only SHE knows that.

I live in a village. I love it. I know lots of people and cna have achat if I want or just smile and wave and breeze by. I don't have a lot of business for them to know and talking about what |I do have, would bore them. There are some elderly people that I've known a while and I keep an eye on them but am never intrusive.

The only problem has been the amount of building that has gone on is changing the nature of the village. All the children used to go to the primary school that is embedded in the community. Now it can't cope with the numbers and children are having to travel to nearby towns. I will definitely change the nature at atmosphere over time.

We've lived in village for 30 years and love it. I agree it takes a while to be accepted and for a long time the first 15 years we were the "new" people but that didn't mean we weren't welcome. We have thrown ourselves into village life. Both of us have been involved in volunteering in numerous different capacities. I think you get out what you put in tbh.

Not all villages are alike.

@PurpleRainlnTheSky Nope. Lived in a village. Some of my family still live in a village. My sister for example who still lives there had her marriage, domestic abuse and divorce gossiped about by half the village.

Agree OP, I grew up in one - some very narrow minded attitudes (not from everyone of course), and once you have your reputation, it's really difficult to change. That can be really hard when you're growing up. I now live in a big friendly city and I love the variety of people and cultures, there is always something new to do, and someone new to talk to. My husband and children is also not white - when I go back everyone is very nice, but the reality of living there would be quite different I think.

Of course YANBU to hate villages - just like IANBU to hate cities. Everybody's different. I love my village (moved from the suburbs of the town-then-city I was born and brought up in) and wouldn't live in the middle of a city if you paid me - especially London.

I love the village i live in. I hate visiting the city so i rarely do so.

Ooh, I should have read the full thread before responding. I didn't mean any offence, and certainly don't think all people who live in villages are the same. It's just not for me.

It does sound a bit "narrow-minded" to decide every village must be the same.

Ahh, can you name it op? I am about to move to a village in East Sussex, not exchanged yet but this has worries me.

Or pm me?!

I'm a city person (I live in London, and have lived in other big cities like NY). My experience is friendly people, good neighbours and lots to see and do.
Friends of mine did move to a village but found it hard to meet people until they joined the church and had children. But they had to fit in to the village ways. I wouldn't like the quiet and lack of amenities. But each to their own - it's a good thing people like different environments!

Different strokes for different folks. I grew up in a tiny village with nothing there maybe 20 houses, hardly any buses and loved it. I moved to a nearby city in my early 20s with a boyfriend and hated every minute, houses all built up right next to each other etc, I lasted 6 months and went back home. I now live in a different village a few miles from the one I grew up in, well by village it’s really just rows of houses either side of a road really but I love it, nice and quiet, view over fields and can see out to sea not far.

My sister on the other hand lives in a major city and loves it!

YANBU.

Villages bore me stupid. My parents moved when I was in primary school from a brilliant city to rural Yorkshire. Talk about a snooze fest. I got out as soon as I could.

We now live off a busy high street in a brilliant city. Our street is a community and we have loads of friends and acquaintances but my DC never have to live where I did. It was hell.

@Earlydancing this is an absolute bug bear of mine, they are doing this a lot everywhere and I hate it, really dread if they come near me

I think it depends on the village. Ours is full of a real mix of people, mostly from outside of the county originally. Most rub along okay but I don't always enjoy everyone knowing each other's business. When we got our new car, people mentioned it for weeks like it was big news!! There's no going incognito!

Currently live in a large village. I’ve been surprised by the amount of people who were born here and are now raising their own children here.

I can’t decide whether it’s lovely to have stayed where you know with lots of family a matter of streets away, or whether it’s a bit odd to have only existed in such a small world.

Either way, regardless of my thoughts - as long as people are happy that’s the main thing.

That's why I love watching This Country, they have village life spot on. I grew up in a village and it was definitely more Kerry and Curten than Miss Marple.

I am from near where they grew up and it is definitely spot on.

I was a little tentative about moving into a village a couple of years ago, however my fears were unfounded and we've been made very welcome. I know and feel part of the village now, whereas we hardly knew anyone in the town we lived in previously. It's turning out to be so much better than I thought and a lovely place to bring up a family. I think perhaps because more and more families are looking for a country lifestyle the insular nature associated with villages may be becoming less common.

My village is more of a hamlet. There are about 10 houses here. No pub, church or shops. Everyone knows everything about the others. We do have our big fall outs. But we generally help one another.

The community feel is nice. A couple of days ago I was clearing my shed. I told a neighbour to help himself to anything he wanted. We suggested things other neighbours might want. So he went around and distributed my bric a brac to the other neighbours. This inspired others to have a sort out. Boxes of unwanted bric a brac have since been passed around the neighbours to help themselves and pass it on. We pass around jigsaws and books\magazines in a similar way. I'm not even sure where a couple of my jigsaws are but they eventually make it home. There is a Barbara Erskin book doing the rounds just now.

Another East Sussex resident here, although I'm in a small town, rather than a village.

The town has a liberal (note the small L!) reputation, but there are always people with funny ideas. My NDN pulls a face like a cat's arse about the Single Mother over the road who doesn't cut her front hedge and (this is shocking, those of a sensitive disposition may wish to stop reading here ) LEAVES HER BINS OUT ON THE GRASS VERGE ALL THE TIME! But there's a reasonable degree of diversity ethnically and I've never heard any racism apart from a couple of die hard local eejits.

I want to move to a village, so I'd love to know where your village is OP. Then I'll come and move there and give them someone else to talk about.

I think it depends on your experience. I've stayed in a village alot as the in-laws live in one. It would drive me crazy as I don't like the countryside much and feel hemmed in when I'm there. We live in London, know all our neighbours and love all the convenience on our doorstep. But I can see why you wouldn't.

My village is officially a village but is more of a very small town. It's only a couple of miles from bigger towns too so not isolated. I love it. It's utterly bonkers and people know each other's business (I bumped into someone I didn't know at work the other week and he lives here and he knew where I lived and the cars we drive etc) but if anyone is in any bother everyone comes together and helps them. We also have people competing to be the most charitable so over 100 families got hampers this Christmas. I bloody love it.

I love my village. I don’t like people moving here from London, expecting it to be like the city….