AIBU to not want my son to do rugby because of the culture?

[sausagedogsforever]

I probably am being unreasonable but, my DS aged 5 really wants to do rugby. He once had a taster session, loved it and has asked to go since (for a good year). So shows no signs of getting over the urge.

I am thinking maybe I should take him again to another taster (maybe he won't like it) but also what if he loves it?

I used to like watching rugby and I find the games much more family friendly to watch than football matches. However, I've heard terrible things about rugby players and rugby playing culture? Like gross drinking games, sexism, just all round bad behaviour and treatment of women, initiation games to fit in etc.
is this really what it's like? Does anyone have any experience?
The other issue is injury, it's likely in a sport like that, so do I really want to encourage this?
Any advice welcome. Has anyone got a rugby playing son/husband?
Am I being unreasonable?

Oh yes. Rugby league is played in lots of schools and isn’t posh. It threw me because nobody would ever say RL is posh

@PotatoPie888

That is such rubbish *@Freshprincess* I would love to know where you live

The north west. We’ve got 4 professional rugby clubs within a 15 mile radius. Most of the men I know played at some point. My DCs played and hates it at school. It’s not posh round here.

I live in the southwest @PotatoPie888 and a lot of the state schools here play it but then the south west is a bastion of rugby - bath, Gloucester, Bristol, exeter all in the premiership with the Cornish pirates in the championship. Of course generally most schools play football because you need less equipment than for rugby.

OP echoing what others have said, he’ll love it & her a lot out of it plus at 5 I don’t think you need to worry about the drinking just yet!

Potato pie we don't all share your location.,🤷

@PotatoPie888

Honestly this website is hilarious. Some of you will argue black is white. Rugby Union is a working-class sport, every state school plays it and nobody ever gets injured. It’s mad.

So... Amongst others, I am lying?

I taught in state schools, ruby union was a mandatory winter sport.

The grass roots clubs around here are all working class, forest miners, bin men, office workers, cemetery groundsmen, etc etc.

My ex pupils are not in professional clubs and none, male or female currently play for England?

OK!

@Freshprincess that’s a rugby league. A completely different game.

@OldaRailer You don’t say! I am so shocked.

@Theeyeballsinthesky

I live in the southwest *@PotatoPie888* and a lot of the state schools here play it but then the south west is a bastion of rugby - bath, Gloucester, Bristol, exeter all in the premiership with the Cornish pirates in the championship. Of course generally most schools play football because you need less equipment than for rugby.

OP echoing what others have said, he’ll love it & her a lot out of it plus at 5 I don’t think you need to worry about the drinking just yet!

Yep. That's the area I am talking about.

The small market town I live in loves it's yearly grudge match against those pirates. And every man jack of them went to a state school and is from a working class background.

Sorry, smirking here thinking if the cat in the hat supporters 😆

OP, the culture around rugby is horrible - as you describe - once they get into their mid-teens.

I was glad when my DS gave it up after school and didn't carry on at Uni.

But he did enjoy it and it was fun when he was younger.

[quote PotatoPie888]@Freshprincess that’s a rugby league. A completely different game.[/quote]
I don’t know about all the schools, but the one my DCs went to played union. We have a couple of amateur union clubs as well. Again, not posh.

Over 32,000 state schools in the UK and only 1,500 play rugby Union. Evidently all their mothers are on mumsnet.

Receipts please. I'd like to see that data.

Look it up yourself if you don’t believe me. I’m not here to serve you.

And I should say I have the RFU I do in front of me... Current 2000+ signed up to its schools project.

And just over 4000 secondary schools in the UK.

So that's 50% of them actively linked to the RFU.

Maybe the answer is not to throw data at a sports scientist 😁

He’s 5!

They are not going to o have drinking games etc. By the time he reaches his teens he may not like it anymore

My figures suggest 35% of schools play, but I bow to your superior knowledge.

I'm in South Wales. Everybody and their granny plays.

Wow, thanks for all the replies!

I absolutely am overthinking and yes he is my first born to answer someone up thread 🤣

I don't know about all the class stuff. @CuriousaboutSamphire really interesting on the history! Thank you 😊

Yeah don't know about the class stuff, I am from Ireland, but live in the U.K. At home most boys play rugby and in all the schools I knew, but I was rural so not sure if that made a difference. Class isn't really much of a thing in Ireland.

@CuriousaboutSamphire

And just over 4000 secondary schools in the UK.

So that's 50% of them actively linked to the RFU.

And I imagine there are many more who play Rugby league. I grew up near Hull and all the secondary schools played league.

I didn't think to do a north south schools search...

I don't think you need to worry about your five year old getting wasted just yet. I discouraged my son from playing rugby because he's really good looking and I didn't want to risk getting his face mangled. Yes, I am completely shallow🤣🤣. He's a big strapping six footer now who plays every sport under the sun and still slags me for not letting him playing rugby.

Ah ha.

1200 schools in league. Mostly northern but London, Essex, Hertfordshire etc have all joined since. Actually, there are more than Wiki and a League page had as there are 2 or 3 League teams within 30 miles of me. Rugby League doesn't seem to publish easy to read data, those numbers are about 10 years old.

And about 33% of secondary schools play rugby league.

Not so much better knowledge as a recent quick google