AIBU- home birth social media support groups are f’ing dangeorus **Content warning - title edited by MNHQ**

[Namechangetimes100]

I’m in a few Fb home birth groups as I was planning to have one til the service got suspended, had an MLU birth instead and was absolutely fine! I’ve not left the group yet (probs should) but some of the advice given is fucking dangerous as hell.

The advice is free birth left right and centre. Birth at home for a pre term (35 week plus) baby, the woman did and the baby needed resus this was met with almost rapturous applause and more recently refuse induction or action for iugr. I mean ffs this advice can kill as well as the doctors = evil mentality.

I do totally believe and support informed consent and I do think that choice isn’t often presented to women in obstetrics and sometimes induction is made to seem like the only choice when it isn’t. I was coerced into induction with a ‘constitutionally small’ baby based on old guidelines so I’m sympathetic to a point to some of these opinions. But to even contemplate birthing a premature baby at home, fgs and a baby measuring under the 3rd centile and dropping and to refuse any sort of medical support in pursuit of the perfect home birth. I just don’t get it.

Any free birth or demanding midwives come out when there’s a national short staffing. It seems like a recipe for disaster.

I totally get my body my choice but seems like playing with fire In some instances to me-aibu?

YANBU at all!

What’s the alternative though? Shutting down these groups and not allowing women to talk to each other?

@betwixtlives

What’s the alternative though? Shutting down these groups and not allowing women to talk to each other?

Of course not, but maybe some common sense advice around risks in certain scenarios like iugr and premature birth. Reading the posts and the overwhelming positive feedback for rejecting medical advice and only positive stories, it may well obscure the risk for a lot of women who might be afraid of hospitals. That plus the inherent distrust of anyone medical, could easily guide someone down a really dangerous path. Just my opinion as I could almost feel myself being sucked in x

I had a home birth. I loved it. The midwife team went out of their way to make it happen for me.
They also made it clear it had to be medically safe and if my blood pressure hadn't dropped, it wouldn't happen.

Having my baby safely was the most important thing.

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

I had a home birth. I loved it. The midwife team went out of their way to make it happen for me. They also made it clear it had to be medically safe and if my blood pressure hadn't dropped, it wouldn't happen.

Having my baby safely was the most important thing.

Lovely! I really wanted one but it was suspended in my area. I recall posting about the service suspension and the advice was just free birth, luckily I had no complications in the MLU but the thought of something going wrong and being alone… seems needlessly dangerous

I agree, there are sadly stories of babies dying as a result of "free births" at home with no medical personnel whatsoever in attendance.

On the other hand, I do think the trend speaks of a deeper issue with maternal care in this country. A small number would no doubt be drawn to this sort of mentality regardless, but I'm fairly confident that a lot more would not if there weren't so many horror stories of mothers' experiences with maternity services.

I completly agree however it raises the bigger issue of misinformation on social media in general.

Not specifically related to home births but I'm on a mums in ..... for my local city and there is so much misinformation on there about everything from breast feeding to a whole host of anti vax bollocks. It pisses me right off but it raises a larger question of who is responsible for it. Twitter and Facebook have recieved alot of backlash but I dont have an answer on how to stop it.

Our local one is bonkers too. A pregnant midwife who was planning a HB was booted out for no other reason than she was a midwife (a spy amongst them or some such).

Completely agree with you @CoalCraft the horror stories about obstetric violence and coercive care really fuel this fire.

Unsurprisingly @Aimee1987 there’s a lot of anti vax sentiment there too, a lot refuse vit k for the baby, refuse anti biotics for testing positive for gbs, booking bloods, some refused all anti natal care and scans x

YANBU that's terrifying. To me these things take on a cult like form. Spiralling to the most 'pure'.

It's a sign of extreme privilege. Women in the developing world who don't have access to hospitals and all they contain don't see birth this way.

I think many people in developed countries forget how dangerous giving birth can be.

Cross post with @drsbaitso

Are these American groups??

Yanbu

I've seen comments like "your body won't grow a baby you can't birth" erm...

And "millions of women have been giving birth for centuries without medical intervention" with a wilful blindness to the rates of maternal and baby death before the advent of modern obstetrics.

In general, there seems to be a complete lack of understanding of how the NHS works on the basis of risk. I am pregnant and had covid a fortnight ago, and was prescribed 2 weeks of blood thinners to reduce the risk of clots. The NHS know that of women in my position x% will have a clot, and y% will be fine either way, the trouble is they don't know which women fall into the x% and which women fall into the y%, so they treat them all to ensure that they catch that x%. This means that some women are treated 'unnecessarily', but it was impossible to know beforehand that they weren't one of the women for whom it was necessary.

Agree. I was in a VBAC (vaginal birth after section) group on FB and a lot of the advice was similarly scary. Encouraging people to go against medical advice etc. I agree that informed consent is important but seemed to be a lot of vocal support for demonising medical staff and getting the birth you want with no acceptance of the risks given by midwives/doctors. It is sad that there is such distrust of the medical profession that women would prefer to listen to unqualified people on social media. I’m not sure how this could be addressed?

@DrSbaitso

It's a sign of extreme privilege. Women in the developing world who don't have access to hospitals and all they contain don't see birth this way.

This. Its relatively recent that we go into pregnancy and birth with the assumption that both mother and baby will be healthy at the end of it.

I agree with you OP, the issue is that some people are very susceptible to believing what they read on forums/the internet, so not always making an informed choice as such.

There is nothing wrong with a home birth in the right circumstances (although I personally would never want to take the risk). However for higher risk pregnancies I just can't see why you wouldn't want to be in the safest environment.

I also agree that it's often not realised how dangerous birth can be. Yes, it can go textbook however it isn't always the case. However maybe I'm biased as I'd have died without medical intervention during both of my deliveries.

@batmanladybird

Are these American groups??

Nope all UK only groups x

Agreed, I was part of a VBAC group that sounds similar and the advice nearly always seemed to be “ignore the doctor/midwife and quote NICE guidelines about your rights to a VBAC” regardless of whatever situation the individual mother was in, and what little information had been given.

I think the problem for a lot of people is that they rightly or wrongly don't feel that they can trust that the relevant medical professionals have their best interests at heart.

I remember a woman in my NCT group saying, sheep give birth without help so why can't we? I just left that one as didn't even know where to start. Plus she looked terrified so I wondered if she was trying to convince herself not me.

There’s a pretty good way of determining if it’s relatively safe to have a homebirth in the UK. If the midwives say yes, you’re probably good to go (but you have to accept you might need to transfer in to hospital if things don’t go to plan). If the midwives say no you’d be daft to say ‘ok, I’m going to freebirth then.´
In other countries homebirths are not a thing because noone will insure the midwives who might otherwise agree to assist.

Prior to the planned homebirth I had, I had an Unattended birth. Now that was scary. And I was in hospital at the time. (Not UK. Other European Country). If you have ever been in that position you'd understand how vital medical staff can be.