To be so embarrassed by my DP’s behaviour at the table

[Soembarrrrassed]

Christmas dinner at my mums this year. DP has been quite sulky not really joining in. Mum spent ages trying to make dinner perfect. He starts eating and says ‘sorry I’m going to have to spit this out it’s too fatty’, and almost spat it out at the table before I asked him to leave to do it. Then when everyone else was still eating, got up as soon as he was finished to go for a cigarette, leaving my family feeling really awkward. We’ve been together three years, it’s never happened before - AIBU to feel really embarrassed by this?

Wow.

You've given this rude bastard 3 years too long.

That is appalling behaviour.

Like previous posters, you have missed some of the cues about his behaviour - and this is the shock of finally seeing something. And it's always a shock.

You can't un-see it, though. So it's best to do something about it.

So if it’s not the first time he’s just some Ill mannered piece of work. As said, up to you if that’s your thing, most of us would be out.

He's awful. No manners, no tact, no respect for others.

Manners cost nothing. Your poor Mum after all that cooking - I'd have thrown it over him or removed his plate.

Get rid. Massively unattractive.

Please listen to your mum. He sounds like an arse. Don't get stuck with him.

Don’t waste another 3 years

What did your Mum say when you asked her what she meant / for examples ?

Have you tried talking to him?

I couldn’t get over this. Rude rude rude.

Did your mum say what the other things that'd happened were? I'd want to know.

@NoNameHere12

Don’t waste another 3 years

This.

Oh dear red flag alert

Dump him! My brother got a divorce last year. Thank G his B... of a wife decided to have an affair and dump him. They were together for 30 years and after almost all parties and get-togethers he had to apologize on her behalf for things she said and did. One of our nieces didn't go to any of our parties for more than five years in order to avoid my abusive ex-SIL. She really liked to make children cry. Don't let him drag you down and ruin your relationship with your family. I managed to stay in touch with my brother but we had to sneak around as if we were having an affair. I have never been anything but respectful, friendly, and polite towards his wife and I never criticized her to him and I was also very careful not to respond in kind when our parents criticized her. I will also not criticize her now. Just in case they get back together.

So so rude. Your mum needs to expand...

I'd ask your mum for examples. He needs binning.

I'd be so embarrassed if my dh did anything like that. Listen to your Mum if she says it is not the first time. I'd ditch him.

He sounds like he’s was distracted and didn’t want to be there.

I think you need a chat with your Mum and see what else she's seen because there's obviously more and then bin him

sounds like he has form for it then i remember being ignorant to ex partners behaviours until afterwards so maybe try to dig a little deeper. Hes acting really rude

Why did he put the fat in his mouth to begin with? What an idiot!!!!

@NoNameHere12

Don’t waste another 3 years

This.

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry

This sounds like the sort of thing someone does to engineer a row so they get dumped to avoid having to end the relationship themselves.

This could well be what he was up to.

Have you told him he was unacceptably rude OP?