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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

“Please have lunch ready for 1pm. Thankyou.”

838 replies

diydh · 21/12/2021 16:22

I’m interested to know if anyone else’s husband would say this in the morning before disappearing into his office for several hours. Please be honest.

YABU - yes, fair enough
YANBU - no, he is being quite bossy

OP posts:
Bubblty · 21/12/2021 16:33

If it was my turn to make lunch I'd expect a "would you mind making it for 1pm". Not a fucking demand.

TheCrowFromBelow · 21/12/2021 16:33

Xmas Shock only if I asked, Which happens about once in a blue moon.
So, Was lunch at ready at 1?

GreetingsAndSalutations · 21/12/2021 16:33

Assuming you’re not his staff “quite bossy” is an understatement.

He wouldn’t be getting lunch at all, let alone the time he instructed for.

Cuwins · 21/12/2021 16:34

Absolutely not. I think I would be too gobsmaked to respond!
Agree with pp if he had said he was really busy any chance you could do him a favour by making him a sandwich for 1pm then the response would be yes of course. But as a regular thing then no he can make his own lunch and if I'm spoken to like that then absolutely not!

AnotherMansCause · 21/12/2021 16:34

He’d find an unopened tin of soup on the counter, & I’d have gone out.

LadyCleathStuart · 21/12/2021 16:34

Oh god my DH wouldn't dare.

Ti be fair though he also wouldn't want to eat anything I cooked (neither would I).

CMOTDibbler · 21/12/2021 16:35

I just asked DH. He says it worded in that way might result in lunch, but with an invoice.

Offmyfence · 21/12/2021 16:35

He would say that if he wanted to be laughed at!

TakeMe2Insanity · 21/12/2021 16:35

@diydh

I’m interested to know if anyone else’s husband would say this in the morning before disappearing into his office for several hours. Please be honest.

YABU - yes, fair enough
YANBU - no, he is being quite bossy

Hell no!

DH wfh since this began, with his own office space at home, makes his own lunch unless I’ve made something that needed cooking eg homemade soup but always heatable.

RaininSummer · 21/12/2021 16:36

Cheeky sod. I would go out and leave him to it if possible.

AdaColeman · 21/12/2021 16:36

Only if he were speaking to the Cook General or the Housekeeper!

SheWoreYellow · 21/12/2021 16:36

Why are you making his lunch?

phishy · 21/12/2021 16:36

And I bet you complied.

AtlasPine · 21/12/2021 16:37

He worded it badly. If your situation is that you are a home maker and he is the only wage earner, and he gets very short windows in which to eat something in the middle of the day, he should have said - would you mind awfully putting something aside for my lunch for 1pm as it’s the only 15 minutes I’ll have? Thanks so much.’

Then maybe.

Otherwise, forget it.

BurningTheClocks · 21/12/2021 16:38

Mine’s just asked ‘Is she not eating with him?
In which case, the sentence should have been ‘Could we have lunch at one o’clock please? ‘ And he should have waited for an answer.

icedcoffees · 21/12/2021 16:40

If my DH said that I would just laugh, and when he emerged, I'd be pointing him in the direction of the kitchen!

2catsandhappy · 21/12/2021 16:40

Throw a babybel at his head. Sorted.

Dixiechickonhols · 21/12/2021 16:41

No. We both wfh and have a discussion about what time to have lunch (meetings).
I’d definitely ‘be in a meeting’ at 1pm.
He’s speaking to you like you are a junior employee.

AyeOop · 21/12/2021 16:41

Hmm, I probably wouldn't take offence, once my husband is in work mode, that's it. He focuses on work and that's it
I'd rip the piss out of him endlessly. He'd be apologetic but I agree it depends on the tone

ChargingBuck · 21/12/2021 16:42

@diydh

Yes this is as I thought. And yes, his words were - “darling, please have lunch ready for one o’clock, Thankyou.’ Then he just sort of walks off.

He will think this is totally normal and he’s just trying to be helpful in communicating his schedule. That’s what he would say.

Why do you make his lunch?

What are you doing about his patronising order - just accepting it?

WiddlinDiddlin · 21/12/2021 16:42

I might ask OH that but it would be 'I've got x y z to do... could you sort lunch at 1 please?'...

But thats because I have xyz to do and he has to do the cooking/food putting on plate as I can't get in the kitchen or reach the cupboards to do that... he is my carer as well as OH!

In your shoes OP, I'd leave a note saying 'Kitchen available 1pm til 2pm, if you want a chef, please hire one!'... And then piss off out!

CallmeHendricksGingleBells · 21/12/2021 16:42

I would raise my eyebrows at him as if to say, "WHAT did you just say???!"

JustDanceAddict · 21/12/2021 16:43

Just no!

I have done when he’s been snowed under and asked nicely, mainly when we were both wfh in lockdowns. No notes though.

OGenkiDesuKa · 21/12/2021 16:43

It would be the last thing he said! ⚰️

5keletor · 21/12/2021 16:44

I have made my partner's lunch when I've been off, but he's called or messaged to ask if I mind making it, which I don't because it means we all have lunch together. If I'm not busy I don't mind because he'd do the same for me (and has done), but I'd expect to be asked nicely, if I received the message in the OP I wouldn't.

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