To hate working with women

[HousethatChunkbuilt]

I am a feminist and I think women are incredible. I am proud at all we achieve, having babies, periods, going through the menopause, the constant harassment, fear of violence, discrimination, sexism... the list goes on.
HOWEVER I find it incredibly difficult to work in all female teams. I have nearly always worked in all female environments in entry level jobs.
The bitchiness is unreal. Everyday comments lead to tears, meltdowns, refusal to come in. This has happened in every single workplace. The only place I haven't had this is in a shop where it was mostly men and other (quite mature) women. Oh and one place where we were all different nationalities, is cattiness a British thing?
It just takes so much time and effort navigating the various rifts, arguments, feuds and rivalries. I honestly think we'd rule the world if we could get rid of this shit.
I'm quite matter of fact and get frustrated that this taking up so much time!

Wow, the op is like goady fucker bingo. We have:
‘I’m a feminist’ ✅
Women are all bitchy ✅
Bit of casual ageism ✅
‘Is this a British thing’✅

🙄

@AFS1

This isn’t representative of my experience working in all-women environments.

Same, my favourite job was an all female team.

I've only had one manager who was a woman who always acted professionally and she was gay.

@bratzybaby, what on earth does the woman's sexuality have to do with anything??

The only place l worked where there were quite a few personality clashes was an office, many years ago, in the civil service. Mostly female on my team, all of a similar age, very driven, quite well educated yet lacking in flexibility and empathy.
But on the whole most people l have worked with in various enviroments have rubbed along alright and l have made some very meaningful friendships.

Women can be bitchy and bullying to someone who does not fit in with the crowd, just like school bullying. I’ve probably had more hassle from supervisors or managers than co workers, men are not a problem to me I can cope with them.

Maybe OP should get extra training and become a supervisor where unpopularity is fairly standard (in my experience)

I have also worked mainly with women and found it to be a very comfortable working environment. In fact, I have had the most laughs during those times, they were a great bunch.
The primary school gate mafia? Now that’s a whole different bunch of women!

Not a female thing. Team culture can go toxic, usually depending on the personality of the leader - and that leadership can be formal or informal (informal where that person isn't officially in charge but "rules the roost" type person by tacit agreement of the group.

In 20 years I've had the displeasure of working in only a couple of toxic teams - the common denominator wasn't women but the dynamic where there was an unofficial group leader - and they were awful. This led to bitchiness, back biting, one upmanship type stuff. The first was male, and he was just hideous, and the second female and she was just as bad. I've just realised they would likely have gotten along like a house on fire!

@Spudlet

Wow, the op is like goady fucker bingo. We have: ‘I’m a feminist’ ✅ Women are all bitchy ✅ Bit of casual ageism ✅ ‘Is this a British thing’✅

🙄

I reported it but MNHQ say there's nothing to suggest it's a troll. Apart from all this!

I think it doesn't take much to tip a team (and it doesn't matter if it's men or women or both) from being a very good supportive and functioning team to one that is competitive and disconnect. It could be a new member or a change in role - the dynamics are pushed off kilter

Whilst I can imagine that there's all women teams out their that are bitchy and unpleasant, it's crazy to think that it's everywhere you've worked. So I would think you should do as advise and think about what all your workplaces have in common

I worked in a predominantly female dept for years where everyone got on well on the whole, then they brought in four new staff at the same time and suddenly everything was drama and there was a lot of backstabbing, even amongst the original staff. Looking back two of the new women were very toxic and it all stemmed from them but spread due to their behaviour. I left soon after, I went from loving the job to hating it.

I have never experienced this

Thankfully

And I am 50

I’ve worked for over 40 years in various roles and levels. Never come across this.

I agree with the OP - I find there is so much bitchiness in an all female workforce - similar to an all girls school. I left my last job due to the petty behaviour and bitchiness that occured.- quite a small workforce 35 women and 2 men This probably doesn't happen in all female dominated workplaces but I definitely think that having male colleagues as well really does stop the competitiveness and bitchiness that goes on between women. I now work with in a 60% women 40% men industry and I am so much happier - I find men are so much easier to get on with at work because I think women in the workplace are always competing against each other.

I also work in a supportive environment, don’t like the role, but the people are fab irrespective of their gender/sex.

When I was much less senior years ago, and worked in a predominantly female area it was as you described. Bitchy, back stabbing and catty.

I now put it down to immaturity and too many young women vying for attention. As older women on the team doing different roles, we love each other.

@Nayday

Not a female thing. Team culture can go toxic, usually depending on the personality of the leader - and that leadership can be formal or informal (informal where that person isn't officially in charge but "rules the roost" type person by tacit agreement of the group.

In 20 years I've had the displeasure of working in only a couple of toxic teams - the common denominator wasn't women but the dynamic where there was an unofficial group leader - and they were awful. This led to bitchiness, back biting, one upmanship type stuff. The first was male, and he was just hideous, and the second female and she was just as bad. I've just realised they would likely have gotten along like a house on fire!

Yes - that is what I was getting at (just mine was more waffley!!)

My experience of working with women is it's generally fine at lower and middle management levels, but women right at the very top are awful, 9 times out of 10. It's as if they feel like they have to model stereotypical male behaviours to get there - they have no empathy, they push people under buses, they're aggressive... I could go on.

Like the OP, this really upsets me, as I've had very few female role models I want to emulate, and I'd really like to be able to champion women at the top.

Is the difference here working environments which are competitive rather than collaborative? (Regardless of sex).

Lol if you think this is exclusively female behaviour. I spent many years working in a predominantly male industry. I was normally the only woman and I saw very similar behaviour from men with the added bonus of the occasional bout of fisticuffs.

One cherished memory is two very competitive but not very macho men having a falling out over who was responsible for a very large and lucrative sale. Me and the manager watched open mouthed as they started to grapple with each other on the sales floor. Then, still struggling they very slowly and gracefully rolled backwards down the very grand, illuminated, spiral glass staircase. Luckily it was all on CCTV so we could replay it at our leisure when we needed a laugh.

I had six months working in a retail environment when I was a student. I worked with all women and it was absolutely miserable as they were constantly bitching and moaning. I think the reason wasn’t because they they were women as I’ve worked in female dominated teams since and it wasn’t like that but they were so bored, once they’re reorganised the clothes into size order for the 45th time that day, there wasn’t anything else to do other than bitch and moan. It’s the only job I’ve ever had that I didn’t like and I’d really not like to go back there again.

I work in an all female environment (primary school) and it’s a very collaborative, supportive environment 95% of the time. We are all over 40 though.

@bettys9thleg

I'm in a nearly all female team (1 man) and it's a lovely supportive atmosphere. We big each other up, commiserate when our kids are sick. Help each other. I know the sort of atmosphere you're describing but I have found it's happened more in mixed teams then all female ones. Obvs just my experience there though.

Same here. It has also come to my notice that in mixed teams, some women don't like it if other women get promoted.

I find there is so much bitchiness in an all female workforce - similar to an all girls school

I did an all female degree course. They were all absolutely lovely. No ‘bitching’ never fell out. I’m still in touch with them years later.

Wow, no, I don't feel like this at all. I have worked in all female teams previously but have fairly recently inherited a senior team that is all male. I miss the women!!!

Not seeing how you can describe yourself as a feminist and then refer to the "cattiness" and bitchiness" of women.

@PurpleDaisies

This has happened in every single workplace.

What do those workplaces have in common?

All these women I work with are awful! What is the commonality?