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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

This isn't enough for Christmas....

290 replies

bridgeovertroubledwatrr · 13/12/2021 17:11

Strangely this is my first proper boyfriend at 29Confused
Anyway been together 7 months and I'm not sure if I have enough for him for Christmas
So far
Adidas tee
Vans tee
Adidas jogging bottoms
Backback
Pjs
Socks

Spent around £120
Do I get more bits or am I okay with that?
Don't want to come across stingy but then don't want to be ott
Is this okay ?

OP posts:
MyAnacondaMight · 13/12/2021 18:37

Agree it’s a lot to spend, especially on random bits of clothing. I also prefer to give and receive a single big present, as it’s more impactful, but if you can’t think of anything then stick with what you’ve got - definitely don’t add to it. I fear you may be disappointed with what you receive in return.

peboh · 13/12/2021 18:38

Also I wouldn't be too concerned about buying him clothes, like some other posters are making out. I often buy my dh clothes for christmas/birthday. He wouldn't usually go out and buy some of the things himself, so I happily will. Some people don't want sentimental gifts, and would rather functional ones. That's totally cool.

sunlight81 · 13/12/2021 18:38

11y in and I will get nothing ... at 7m I think ur all good.

mam0918 · 13/12/2021 18:42

I agree with PP... fine in amount of gifts but high in cash amount.

I understand as I use to jump in both feet first too but be careful as when I was 17 and very naive I once saved up and bought a boyfriend a 6 month a guitar and he promptly dumped me right after Xmas.

Chely · 13/12/2021 18:43

Our 1st Christmas together I bought him a watch for about £200 and a few little bits. He bough me an engagement ring and other bits so spent a lot more than I did. Oh the days before children.

blablablack · 13/12/2021 18:46

That's plenty. I'd say anything around £100 wld be about right. Let's hope he gets u something gd back lol.

ZenNudist · 13/12/2021 18:49

Too much and not special enough

CSJobseeker · 13/12/2021 18:51

@peboh

Also I wouldn't be too concerned about buying him clothes, like some other posters are making out. I often buy my dh clothes for christmas/birthday. He wouldn't usually go out and buy some of the things himself, so I happily will. Some people don't want sentimental gifts, and would rather functional ones. That's totally cool.
In a well established relationship maybe, but after 7 mths, pyjamas and socks isn't that romantic. 7 mths you should be at the romantic stage still!
Musmerian · 13/12/2021 18:51

@WhatToDo1988

Strange choice of presents....his mother can buy him clothes and socks, not his girlfriend of 7 months. For Christmas, you want to buy him something nice and fun. Keep it light. And £120 is quite a lot actually.
Can’t he buy his own clothes and socks?
gogohm · 13/12/2021 18:52

I'm not spending that much, simply don't have it. Stop worrying

mogsrus · 13/12/2021 18:55

It’s the thought that counts isn’t it, not how much cash you get rid of, enjoy the day.

Dita73 · 13/12/2021 18:56

It’s all very boring. You need a fun or slightly meaningful present

starfishmummy · 13/12/2021 19:01

Way too much. However we have always been a CD/DVD (when people actually wanted those) or book sort of price range.

Time40 · 13/12/2021 19:01

Yikes OP, you've got a lot of rather unkind and unhelpful comments!

I think your presents are absolutely fine - very kind and generous. My partner and I often buy each other several presents, and we don't consider them to be "bits" - we do it because we think it's nice to have lots of things to open.

Have a lovely first Christmas together!

lololololollll · 13/12/2021 19:03

Blow job is enough

Notajogger · 13/12/2021 19:04

I'd say that's too much. Especially after only 7 months!

WithANameLikeDaniCalifornia · 13/12/2021 19:05

He won't tell me what he got me
It's a surprise apparently

That means he’s not bought you anything yet.

crystal1717 · 13/12/2021 19:07

Too much
7 months = scarf and nice chocs. That's if Im shagging him a lot and like him a lot. Otherwise just nice chocs. :)

NamechangeApril21 · 13/12/2021 19:08

I spent about that much on my husband our first Christmas together. It's naturally dwindled over the years so a lesser amount - we're not lovesick puppies anymore trying to impress and woo each other, children to buy for, growing extended family of nieces and nephews to buy for, plus getting older there's less we need and we've already bought each other all the sentimental stuff. I think that actually sounds OK for a first Christmas after 7 months.

Scbchl · 13/12/2021 19:08

I think its absolutely fine op and not an over extravagant amount you have spent.

Caramelbeans · 13/12/2021 19:11

What is with these commentsGrin

I think your presents sound fine OP, but again it depends on your salaries and expectations around Xmas.

I get my DP socks and joggers too, as these are what he loves and always asks for(amongst other things), it isn’t a boring present if it’s requested.

NameChange776543 · 13/12/2021 19:11

It depends how you are financially. I’m a student but I’ve bought my boyfriend an Apple Watch plus £150ish worth of other gifts. I grew up with nothing and get the full loan now so I use that and any other money I make to spoil others where I can as I couldn’t afford to when I was younger (23 now).

Peanutmnm · 13/12/2021 19:12

Don't give him the socks. You're not his mum!

I think you've spent a lot but up to you. I think something cheaper but more tied to what you know about him like a meaningful book or (what I got my now husband on our first Christmas dating) a global knife as he was into cooking at the time. He loved it and knew I was listening but hadn't gone overboard.

NameChange776543 · 13/12/2021 19:12

Forgot to add *
If you’re comfortable, it’s enough.. if you’re not then it’s probably too much. Don’t put yourself into debt or spend because you feel you have to

PinkWednesdays · 13/12/2021 19:17

@FlickyCrumble

Check what he's spending on you.
This. First Christmas DH and I (when dating) spent around £350 on each other. Last Christmas was our first as husband and wife and we spent a lot more. This year, we agreed a budget of £500 because I’m on mat leave.

It depends how much each of you can afford and what you agree re budget.