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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think everyone hates their MIL?

282 replies

Mercs · 09/12/2021 21:22

As a mum of boys I am honestly petrified people hate their mother in law and I am destined to become an old lady that never sees their kids or grandkids

OP posts:
WhatAWasteOfOranges · 09/12/2021 21:23

I love mine!

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 09/12/2021 21:24

Love mine! As long as you’re not overbearing and try to run their lives/get panicky because she turns to her mother a bit more than you, then you’ll be fine Flowers

A580Hojas · 09/12/2021 21:24

Too many threads on the subject today!

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/12/2021 21:25

You must have missed the weekly “my MIL is amazing” threads where people congratulate themselves on their good fortune.

Don’t be a dick to any DILs and you have no reason to think they’ll hate you.

Cloudyzebra · 09/12/2021 21:25

Get on fine with mine.

ReeseWitherfork · 09/12/2021 21:25

I love mine! She's not perfect, can be a tad overbearing sometimes but nothing most mother's aren't like.

ComDummings · 09/12/2021 21:25

Of course they don’t.
I’ll be like my own lovely MIL when my children are grown up, she gets it right and she’s just brilliant.

boatyardblues · 09/12/2021 21:25

I love my MIL too. She’s lovely.

HangingDitch · 09/12/2021 21:25

Eh?

Mine is absolutely great. Far too generous with her time and money.

whiteroseredrose · 09/12/2021 21:25

I adore mine. She is great fun. She doesn't interfere but will always be there if I ask.

surreygirl1987 · 09/12/2021 21:26

Mine is lovely! I see her more than I see my own mother! My husband is SO close to his mum (way closer than I am to my mum) and she is really involved in his life / our lives. She does make an effort though. I'm the difficult one, not her, but she tries really hard to get on with me (for which I'm grateful).

OverByYer · 09/12/2021 21:26

I hope not, I have 2 sons no daughters so I would like to think I will have a good relationship with future daughter in laws. I fond some of the MIL threads so worrying.

SW1amp · 09/12/2021 21:26

Mine is lovely

We don’t have much in common, and come from quite different backgrounds but she is lovely, her heart is in the right place, and we do as much as we can to find common ground (and respectfully avoid bringing up topics where we definitely won’t agree..!)

Combustablecustard · 09/12/2021 21:27

I dont get on that well with mine but its not for want of trying on my part. Shes just not been nice to me or dh.

IKnowAPlace · 09/12/2021 21:27

I like mine more than I like my own, if that helps?

Swirlywoo · 09/12/2021 21:28

Mine is lovely. Bonkers but lovely.

TeddyTonksGirlfriend · 09/12/2021 21:28

Mines lovely

TrishM80 · 09/12/2021 21:28

The problem is no one starts threads about how great their mothers in law are.

ShottaSheriff · 09/12/2021 21:29

I love mine and we get on well. She can be a bit maddening at times but so can most people!

IGotAVaxAndILikedIt · 09/12/2021 21:29

I love mine. She isn't my Mum. But she did an excellent job with my husband (and my awesome SIL) and loves my children fiercely.

We are much closer to DH's family on a day to day basis, mostly because his family is much smaller and physically closer. My family is HUGE and spread out so we see each other less regularly. My Mum also has 20+ grandkids (and now a handful of great-grandchildren) whereas our two our my MIL's only grandchildren.

There just aren't many threads about happy functional relationships, because those are normal, so what is there to say?

GoodnightGrandma · 09/12/2021 21:29

I liked mine. It was her husband that was the problem, he meant she saw less of her grandchildren.

Harvey3 · 09/12/2021 21:30

My MIL is great, and I have a son. I'm very happy for her to get involved with him, so try not to worry!

samandpoppysmummy · 09/12/2021 21:30

I love mine :)

oldestmumaintheworld · 09/12/2021 21:30

I've had three MILs ( complicated family). One was sweet, one was fantastic and one was grim and I avoided. If you are a nice person and your son marries a nice person you'll add a lovely relationship to your family. If he marries the wrong person or you behave badly you won't.
I'm now about to become a MIL and I really like both my DILs. They are lovely and add greatly to my life. I'll do all I can to keep it that way.

Inmypjsagain · 09/12/2021 21:31

My MiL is lovely!!! We’re lucky (even if she does have favourites!) my husband’s brother is super close to her as well and his wife loves her too.

There have been a few threads about horrible in laws, I’ve often been asked “oh how are the in laws” expecting me to say they’re awful so I guess it’s pretty common!