Page 5 | 'They've got their own lives' and other stock phrases

saywhatagain · 2021-12-07T18:07:40+00:00

I'm an adult social worker and I hear words to the tune of 'X never visits/helps because they have their own lives' many times a month. Another popular one is 'I've worked all my life and now I have to pay, but if I'd sat on my arse my whole life / was an immigrant (etc) I'd get it all for free'. Or another popular one, 'the GP gave me your number as my mother/father/aunt (etc) needs to go into a care home right NOW' - and 9/10 times it's a either health need not a social one or the person is nowhere near care home ready. Tell me yours for your job, make me feel better about the Groundhog Day that my job is at the moment?

Aussiegirl123456 · 07/12/2021 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

crackofdoom · 07/12/2021 20:02

“You spelt that wrong hahahaha” 🙄

“Don’t see many people doing that nowadays”

(almost invariably older men)

I’m a signwriter.

PinkAndPurpleClouds · 07/12/2021 20:02

@fratellia

Retail- something doesn’t scan or has trouble scanning ‘I suppose it’s free then! Hahaha’

McDonald’s drive-thru collection window- ‘Any sugars with hot drink?’ ‘No I’m sweet enough! Hahahaha’

Always said by middle-aged+ men

Oh yeah, the amount of middle aged men who try to be funny makes me roll out of my head. Even my own DH does it. 'Would you like any cash back sir?'' .... cue big grin ...'I will have it if it's free!'

EVERY. FUCKING. TIME.

When we leave the shop I sigh and roll my eyes and say 'FFS you're not funny and that line is older than God.' He says 'well SHE was laughing/smiling...' I try to explain that it's part of her job to be polite, but he won't have it. He is convinced he is a hilarious cheeky chappie who all the laydeez just lurve, coz he is soooo funny!!!

These checkout operators/cashiers hear the same dreadful wanky shit 100 times a day from men usually aged 45 to 65 ish. Makes me cringe so hard when middle aged men say this shit, and especially when DH says it. I feel so sorry for the poor women having to tolerate it too.

RockallMalinHebrides · 07/12/2021 20:02

@BeyondMyWits

Pharmacy... the doctor said it would be here and ready in 20min.

x1000

PinkAndPurpleClouds · 07/12/2021 20:03

Makes my EYES roll out of my head!

whistleryukon · 07/12/2021 20:03

@flymetotheloon so, are you only going to vent your spleen at the social worker who is 'breaking confidentiality'? You don't seem troubled by all of the other anecdotes shared by various other professionals. Aren't you going to write 72 posts to all of the solicitors/those working with dv perpetrators who have shared their comments calling them disgraces to their profession? Or did you just fancy hoofing a social worker to pass the time.

emptyvesselsmakethemostnoise · 07/12/2021 20:03

@flymetotheloon

Wow.

What an unprofessional post from a SW bitching about the things that clients say.

Especially given recent news events.

Ever heard of confidentiality?

I work in a profession where confidentiality is paramount and have to be very careful what I post on the internet but im struggling to see what confidence the op has breached. I don't see anything identifying from the post

slashlover · 07/12/2021 20:03

@flymetotheloon Why don't you report the thread then instead of spamming it?

In retail "I won't be back!!" Generally said by the type of customer you're pleased to see the back of.

Selling scratchcards. "A £1 scratchcard please."
"Any particular one?"
"A winning one!"
Several times per day.

flymetotheloon · 07/12/2021 20:04

@Aussiegirl123456

Honestly, she can’t tell you what it means. Despite acting like she’s the queen of managing social workers, she likely has never had a job in her life and just comes on here to bully and mock people when she’s had too much wine.

OP hope you’re not too disheartened. You do an amazingly hard job and from your further responses of explaining how well you get to know your clients and how you listen to their individual stories, you sound lovely. The profession is lucky to have you. X

Gosh, you accused me of being a bully for posting about ethical codes. And yet here you are, talking about me like this.

echt · 07/12/2021 20:05

How come the OP is getting it in the neck, yet those who claim client confidentiality have nothing to say about those in other jobs who've hopped on here to share the daily grind?

flymetotheloon · 07/12/2021 20:05

[quote whistleryukon]@flymetotheloon so, are you only going to vent your spleen at the social worker who is 'breaking confidentiality'? You don't seem troubled by all of the other anecdotes shared by various other professionals. Aren't you going to write 72 posts to all of the solicitors/those working with dv perpetrators who have shared their comments calling them disgraces to their profession? Or did you just fancy hoofing a social worker to pass the time.[/quote]
I haven't read any of the other posts I've been too busy replying to all of the people who are insisting that the OP is ok.

What about you, are you going to respond to every post on the thread?

Workyticket · 07/12/2021 20:06

"I've never been taught this before, all my teachers have been crap"

Original poster

saywhatagain · 07/12/2021 20:06

@Fairyliz where did I say I find clients a nuisance? That's not what this post is about,

It's not meant to be about social work.

If you contacted the team I work on and I was on duty that day I'd be out to visit you and FIL the next week if not sooner and he'd have the support he needs pretty quickly (assuming we can find the care which is a huge worry at the moment due to shortages) and if he needed a placement he'd be there within days. I do have a huge caseload but I do my best to support everyone as best I can.

OP posts:

5128gap · 07/12/2021 20:08

I just want someone to tell me what identifiable means if it doesn't mean able to identify by.

slashlover · 07/12/2021 20:09

114 posts on this thread, 18 (16%) are flymetotheloon moaning.

The number of times I would tell a customer that we were out of an item and they'd declare I'll go to Tesco then!" then stare at me as if that phrase was going to make the item magically appear.

Wheresmywoolyjumpers · 07/12/2021 20:09

I don't believe in mental health. To a mental health worker. After referring themselves for help.

maddiemookins16mum · 07/12/2021 20:10

Ex complaints handler…
‘I know it’s not your fault, but…..’

DrCoconut · 07/12/2021 20:10

I'm paying your wages. Student to lecturer when you don't agree 100% with what they say.

inmyslippers · 07/12/2021 20:11

When I worked in care

"I couldn't do what you do"

Nobody asked 🤷🏽‍♀️

SemiAquaticWoman · 07/12/2021 20:11

I have a relative who needs the services of Adult Social Care. I am estranged from this person because they joined with another family member in emotionally abusing me to the point of a breakdown and near suicide. I am acutely aware of the costs to an overstretched department of their care. If I was able to meet some of their needs it would save time and money for people like OP. But I just can't bring myself to see this person again. I feel immense guilt and shame about the situation and never talk about it as I don't think most people would understand. However I would expect better from a professional. Remarks like OP's, even though they are generic and not aimed at me personally, add to the pain and shame. I'm disappointed at the attitude that if anyone needs help from social services it means their family hasn't tried hard enough. Should we expect no help from the state at all?

flymetotheloon · 07/12/2021 20:12

@slashlover

114 posts on this thread, 18 (16%) are flymetotheloon moaning.

The number of times I would tell a customer that we were out of an item and they'd declare I'll go to Tesco then!" then stare at me as if that phrase was going to make the item magically appear.

Hilarious.

I've got whistleryukon complaining for me not posting more and you working out the percentage of the posts that are from me (what an unusual thing you've chosen to do there).

I'm 'moaning' 'bitching' 'never had a job in my life' and on the wine, apparently. Because I have an opinion and have stated it on an AIBU thread.

Really, are you all ok?

Aussiegirl123456 · 07/12/2021 20:12

@DrCoconut

I'm paying your wages. Student to lecturer when you don't agree 100% with what they say.

I had this exact thing said to me numerous times. I taught a module while doing my PhD - so I was unpaid anyway!

flymetotheloon · 07/12/2021 20:13

@SemiAquaticWoman

I have a relative who needs the services of Adult Social Care. I am estranged from this person because they joined with another family member in emotionally abusing me to the point of a breakdown and near suicide. I am acutely aware of the costs to an overstretched department of their care. If I was able to meet some of their needs it would save time and money for people like OP. But I just can't bring myself to see this person again. I feel immense guilt and shame about the situation and never talk about it as I don't think most people would understand. However I would expect better from a professional. Remarks like OP's, even though they are generic and not aimed at me personally, add to the pain and shame. I'm disappointed at the attitude that if anyone needs help from social services it means their family hasn't tried hard enough. Should we expect no help from the state at all?

Perhaps the people who are screeching at me could take a moment to consider this post and others like it.

I'm sorry for your experience semiaquaticwoman

gogohm · 07/12/2021 20:13

Sound familiar @saywhatagain

I hear them too

IGotHam · 07/12/2021 20:13

Flymetotheloon you have an unpleasant hectoring tone. Maybe try and calm down.