To wonder why this has come through the post for DH..?

[namechangedaily]

Saw an opened perfumed shaped parcel on the side and curiosity got the better of me so thought I'd sneak and see if it was the Chanel perfume I'd be hinting about. Found this..
Would you assume it's a secret Santa?
Or I've just had a baby and he clearly isn't getting enough...

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@Justheretoaskaquestion91

It's just a sex toy ffs, what on earth is the problem??

That’s disingenuous IMO. There’s different types of sex toys; I suppose ranging from tingling lubricant and cock rings, to 12 inch latex fists. Like if maybe husband ordered the latter to use on himself I would not feel very happy, would you? But it’s “just a sex toy”.

I certainly wouldn't mind. It is a sex toy and we all have needs

Firstly, DH and I have an agreement that we open each week there's post. Whoever gets the post out the post box/ the parcel from the doorstep opens it. Only if we specify NOT to (such as Christmas time) would we not.

And secondly I cannot see the big deal in a DH buying a wank toy to meet his desires whilst his wife is recovering from birth/ dealing with becoming a mum. He's sorting himself out quietly and with no risk to their relationship.

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

It's just a sex toy ffs, what on earth is the problem??

That’s disingenuous IMO. There’s different types of sex toys; I suppose ranging from tingling lubricant and cock rings, to 12 inch latex fists. Like if maybe husband ordered the latter to use on himself I would not feel very happy, would you? But it’s “just a sex toy”.

Rather that than be resentful I don't want to stick my first up his arse if that's something he really enjoys.

You'd have thought if it really was for him that he'd have been a little better at hiding it?!

It looks like one of those artificial 'vaginas' Bulls/Stallions use to collect semen samples in.

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

Do you find the thoughts of grown women cleaning their vaginal secretions off penis-shaped vibrators equally grim?

Yeh, it’s pretty grim. Part of why I don’t own any sex toys; but there is obviously something a bit different from rinsing something and having to like clean something out.

I can’t imagine having this attitude to something so normal. Sexual activity, be that solo or with someone, is messy, wet, sticky etc. That’s the fact of the matter. There’s nothing grim about cleaning up afterwards.

@IamGusFring

TBH my first thought was that it was a scorned affair partner sending him a bit of revenge but then he wouldn't leave it lying there .

Well that's a leap!

This seems to funny to be true made up trying to get re-posted on Mumsnetmaddness?

I can’t imagine having this attitude to something so normal. Sexual activity, be that solo or with someone, is messy, wet, sticky etc. That’s the fact of the matter. There’s nothing grim about cleaning up afterwards

Shame and embarrassment felt after masturbating is a well established and universal trope. The idea of cleaning up sex toys whilst feeling this is what I find tricky, in a way I don’t find cleaning up after having sex with my husband. But of course everyone will try to say that this isn’t a phenomenon that exists 🤷🏻‍♀️😬

OP you have to update us as soon as he gets in at 7.

Well, let him get in first, make him a cuppa then ask him.

Then come tell us :)

@EdgeOfTheSky

“When they say "mini" they aren't kidding. I felt like I was violating an underage Gnome or Hobbit”

Gross. Why does it have a name?! Or do they name vibrators with human names, too? "Oh, how do you like your Dave? I bought a Henry, but I've been thinking I might like something a bit different. Maybe a Robert..."

So hang on, he opened it and left it lying around opened?

Or did you go looking in a drawer/bag and find it…

The answer tells you a lot about what it’s intended for

Do tell OP - what did he say about it?

fabricfanatic

exactly

wouldn't be surprised if the technology was close enough that OP's item can speak and their first words are "What would you like me to be called"....

I’d never open post addressed to my OH without asking. Even if it was for you, how annoying would that be for him if he found out you knew.

It's a sex toy for him. My DH has one just like I have a few bullets, rampant rabbits and wands. It's not a crime its normal! As for people grossed out about cleaning them, there are far grosser parts of sex!

@Shadowboy

I’d never open post addressed to my OH without asking. Even if it was for you, how annoying would that be for him if he found out you knew.

She didn't open it, it was already open!

Was it definitely addressed to him?

I think it's grim - reduces women to a body part

Would you prefer it if your partner ordered a full size sex toll with working voice, rather than one of these?

Whats the big deal? I have seen loads of posts where the forum is up in arms when a man is pestering his partner for sex too soon after giving birth. Men have a lot of failings but they cannot win sometimes.

@Justheretoaskaquestion91

I can’t imagine having this attitude to something so normal. Sexual activity, be that solo or with someone, is messy, wet, sticky etc. That’s the fact of the matter. There’s nothing grim about cleaning up afterwards

Shame and embarrassment felt after masturbating is a well established and universal trope. The idea of cleaning up sex toys whilst feeling this is what I find tricky, in a way I don’t find cleaning up after having sex with my husband. But of course everyone will try to say that this isn’t a phenomenon that exists 🤷🏻‍♀️😬

Depends on what you mean by ‘universal’, really. If you claim it’s something everyone feels, then I’d say no, actually it’s not. Plenty people view masturbation as something normal, healthy, enjoyable and absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. But even if someone feels ‘shame’ after doing it, I don’t see why cleaning the toys afterwards is so grim. But each to their own 🤷‍♀️

Would never open anything addressed to someone else. What if it was perfume? He’s know you’d opened it!
I wouldn’t be impressed if DH ordered that though tbh.

In the Algarve they sell those ‘toys’ in vending machines. I was as kids walked by. Clearly very open about sex in Portugal.

@Benjispruce5

Would never open anything addressed to someone else. What if it was perfume? He’s know you’d opened it! I wouldn’t be impressed if DH ordered that though tbh.

What part of “an opened perfumed shaped parcel” are people not understanding here?

Is it that their eyes are misting over at the sight of the silicone fanny and their brains are reading “an opened” as “an unopened”?

@HaveringWavering totally misread that. Well if it’s open he’s obviously not keeping it a secret, just ask him!

Must be for him.