Just been kicked out of a group for objecting to being referred to as my reproductive organs

[Gerlais]

Group on Facebook. I was referred to as a “uterus owner”. I objected to this. I’m now banned from the group for being transphobic. Everyone piled on me and if I wasn’t kicked out I would have been leaving anyway. I don’t care what other people want to be called but I will not be referred to as my reproductive organs!! It’s not transphobic to want to be referred to as a woman if you were in fact born female and wish to remain a woman? surely?? Or AIBU?

Language matters and there seems to be a bigger picture of watering down female terms. For example a colleague saying "when we are pregnant". Also a general "she" to describe inanimate objects. On Bake Off Crystelle said "she's beautiful" about a cake. It seems inncocuous on the surface, it's just a term, what does it matter? But once you start diluting it a bit here and a bit there then suddenly it doesn't seem such a reach to be called "cervix haver".

I think my response would just be "I do not identify as a uterus haver, please respect how I choose to identify" because they have no response to that.

The people who think cis women should be called "people with uteruses" never seem to think that pre-operative trans women should be called "people with penises"...

Just saying!

The world is gone fucking insane

Oh yes, I was told it’s normal now to refer to people as “birth givers” and “chest feeders” and if I can’t cope with that I should remain silent!! Wtf!!

Unsurprisingly, I went to a work seminar for international men's day and they very firmly used the word "men". Not penis-haver, no "not all men have prostates" when discussing prostate cancer. Highlighted "Fathers" rights to paternity and shared parental leave. Yet on IWD this year they were falling over themselves to make it inclusionary and people-with-periods.

You know you aren't being unreasonable.

Chest feeders is just horrible as well as ridiculous.

Do we stop being women when we stop menstruating? A uterus haver who used to menstruate? I still have all my female bits even though they can't produce children anymore.

YADNBU, OP.

Who the hell wants to be referred to by their reproductive organs, genitals or body parts? It's more than sexist, it's dehumanising.

@EatSleepRantRepeat

Oh yes, I was told it’s normal now to refer to people as “birth givers” and “chest feeders” and if I can’t cope with that I should remain silent!! Wtf!!

Unsurprisingly, I went to a work seminar for international men's day and they very firmly used the word "men". Not penis-haver, no "not all men have prostates" when discussing prostate cancer. Highlighted "Fathers" rights to paternity and shared parental leave. Yet on IWD this year they were falling over themselves to make it inclusionary and people-with-periods.

Exactly. As I said, MEN is still being widely used. It just seems to be women who are being fucked over. (AGAIN!)

Get yourself over the feminism threads and to see even more of this batshittery on a daily basis

Your blood pressure will go up. Mind you

@GetTheFlockOutOfHere I was really tempted to ask in the Q&A how I can tell if I have a prostate, but it felt unfair on the guy presenting from the charity who was being as clear as possible.

Funny how uterus-havers can't ID as women, but trans women can identify as women.

@Gerlais

Even more fuming that I can’t see what they’re all saying about me now!

I'm a member of a couple of iron deficiency groups on FB, wonder if it's one of them ... happy to report back if so! 😁

In general the transfolx are called brave fabulous special unicorns in these groups. Everyone else is dog food. Hth.

YANBU by the way.

It's funny how we're not allowed to refer to pre-op transwomen as penis-havers, isn't it? They get very angry.

It started off just being a generic post about ferritin deficiency diagnosis, it then got onto periods etc and I said I had been offered the coil to stop periods. Someone replied to me and called me a uterus owner - I took great offence as it sounded really bloody derogatory and sexist to me!

I'd have found that massively and almost deliberately insentive - DMum ended up having a hysterectomy becuase she had such terrible periods and resulting anemia.

It's really utterly mad and frankly ridiculous but the word woman really is apparently controversal.

I don’t care what other people want to be called but I will not be referred to as my reproductive organs!! It’s not transphobic to want to be referred to as a woman

Exactly!

Please oh please private mail me the name of the group

What was the group? Which one specifically?

Men are apparently called penis owners (I did ask this!)

Well that's trans exclusionary for starters. Women can have penises too you know!

Admiral Caine …. Obviously men and women can be survivors of invest and rape. Should transwomen have to go to groups for male victims of incest and rape? I also believe that trans women have the highest rate of sexual assault/ violence against them out of any group.

I sometimes think people post things like this so they can have a moan, making regular people think trans women are monsters. Is this the whole story OP or are you gasslighting?

I urge every kind woman in the fence about this stuff to know that transwomen just want to be safe. They don’t want to refer to you by your body parts or any such nonsense. They have difficult hard lives please be kind. And always remember it could be your son/ daughter/ brother/ niece/ dad who comes out as trans next.

If I was asked if I was chest feeding I would have to correct them and say, no I’m breastfeeding. How ridiculous everything is getting.

Is it possible to report the group for this? Mentioning all of the above?

I've voted YABU because I don't think this happened.

Happy to be corrected and apologise if a link to the group and comment are provided.