Neighbour wants to "share" my driveway. I... don't

[TheUnexpectedPickle]

Parking one, buckle up.
I live in a 3 storey Victorian townhouse, my flat is at the bottom, and above me is a 2 story house owned by Snooty Neighbour. I rent, if that's relevant.

The driveway belongs to my flat and the steps up to SNs front door are about halfway up my drive.

Its a double drive and Paul-Next-Door, who owns all 3 storeys of his house, has the other half of the drive.

I bumped in to SN last week and she commented that she is struggling to find parking on the street now that I've moved in. The flat was empty for a while and she was parking on the drive. She then said she's noticed that I'm out for long stretches of time so possibly she could use my drive when I'm out. I pointed out that she wouldn't know when I'm going to be back, so she wouldn't know when to move her car. She then suggested that in that case I park on the street!

So it appears she is imaging some sort of first come first serve arrangement. It took me off guard a bit so I said I'd think about it. Obviously, I thought "no fucking chance"

Last night she caught me coming home and asked if I'd had the chance to think about it. I politely declined and explained that I don't really want to be searching for parking after a 12 hour shift so it doesn't work for me. She then suggested I message her my rota so she knows when she can use the drive, to make it "fair" and then let her know when I'm going to other places and when I'll be back.

Wtf!? I don't want to have to tell a random woman when I'm going to be home! I'm 35 years old, I don't even tell my mother that!

I probably didn't help the situation as I laughed when I said no to that. She then got huffy and started going on about me letting other cars park on the drive. Other cars being my DP, who I then park in front of and block in and Paul Next Door when he had a skip on his drive and asked me very nicely if he could park there for about 2 hours while he had a tyre changed. Neither of these things caused me any inconvenience.

The conversation ended up with her slinking off muttering about me being "unfair"

Bonkers.

I know I'm not being unreasonable really but her whole expectation that this was a great idea has me questioning myself just a tiny bit.

AIBU?

I agree with the others - give her an inch and she'd take a mile. You'd be coming home after a long shift and she'd be on your drive and full of excuses why she couldn't possibly move it. Don't give her that chance.

@AliasGrape

Ask her to pop a key to her place through the door with a list of when she’s going to be away/ out over the next few months - you’ve got some stuff you want to store in her house since she’s got the extra space and after all it’s only ‘fair’. Or maybe you fancy using her bath or watching the widescreen telly or having a potter round the garden and since you don’t have these things and she does you’re sure she’d want to make it ‘fair’.

This.

Tell her you'll charge her for parking on the drive, that will shut her up!! 😂Cheek of her

"Charge her for parking" is becoming this thread's "cancel the cheque"

OP does not want money she wants a reliable dedicated parking space

Oh god we had almost exactly the same situation in our old place except they lived in the ground floor and we were above them (but the driveway was ours)

For the first few times they parked on our driveway we knocked and politely asked them to move so we could park, hoping this would shame them into not doing it again. It didn’t work.

I then took to parking across the driveway when they were on it, blocking them in. The husband was a taxi driver and one evening he needed to get his car off my drive so he could go to work. I ignored his knocking on our door all evening. They never did it again.

@PrimeraVez That's a satisfying anecdote

@PrimeraVez

Oh god we had almost exactly the same situation in our old place except they lived in the ground floor and we were above them (but the driveway was ours)

For the first few times they parked on our driveway we knocked and politely asked them to move so we could park, hoping this would shame them into not doing it again. It didn’t work.

I then took to parking across the driveway when they were on it, blocking them in. The husband was a taxi driver and one evening he needed to get his car off my drive so he could go to work. I ignored his knocking on our door all evening. They never did it again.

I would have had such a warm, rosy glow if I'd done this.

YANBU, not at all!

Surely your neighbour deserves some CF award?! She is totally out of order. In your shoes l would hope she doesn't find out you're having steak dinner or roast, as she will want some and if she doesn't get any will say "its not fair!".

Have you had any more contact with your CF neighbour OP?

Oh god we had almost exactly the same situation in our old place except they lived in the ground floor and we were above them (but the driveway was ours)

For the first few times they parked on our driveway we knocked and politely asked them to move so we could park, hoping this would shame them into not doing it again. It didn’t work.

I then took to parking across the driveway when they were on it, blocking them in. The husband was a taxi driver and one evening he needed to get his car off my drive so he could go to work. I ignored his knocking on our door all evening. They never did it again.

That was a really disgusting thing for you to do.... to teach a CF a wonderful lesson and not keep us all entertained with a real-time thread about it all evening

I definitely don't want to charge her to park there. Even £100 a month wouldn't replace the utter joy of just coming home, parking and going inside. If you've ever lived in London or any other large town you'll understand!

Not seen her since, but on Friday night she did come home from the pub with her mate and they stood outside screeching and giggling at 1am so I lent out the window and yelled "do you know what time it is!? People are trying to sleep!" Like an old lady.

Haven’t RTFT but as you rent that’s a great ‘out’. Explain you can’t sublet so she should contact your LL if she wishes to rent it, they own the drive and decide who uses it.

Perhaps she's like to pay some of your rent if she's sharing some of the premises!

What a CF! If she wants a drive she can buy or rent a flat that comes with one. I used to live in a flat so I feel your pain. You need to put your foot down otherwise she will likely take the piss.

@TheUnexpectedPickle

I definitely don't want to charge her to park there. Even £100 a month wouldn't replace the utter joy of just coming home, parking and going inside. If you've ever lived in London or any other large town you'll understand!

Not seen her since, but on Friday night she did come home from the pub with her mate and they stood outside screeching and giggling at 1am so I lent out the window and yelled "do you know what time it is!? People are trying to sleep!" Like an old lady.

lol

I'm partial to a bit of a screech out of a window myself OP.

In my case it was not long after i moved into my old cottage and some bugger was burning wood - midday, summer - in an overgrown orchard area right next to my garden. Black smoke going all over my clean sheets on the line.

I shouted a few rich expletives out of the back bedroom window to do with him and his bonfire and my washing and the bloke was so apologetic i felt quite bad.

Felt worse the next day. Ended up sitting right next to him watching school play - bad enough - i kept my face turned half away to try and hide - but then he got up to give a talk ... he's only the bloody vicar!

he's only the bloody vicar!
Then he should know better!

Ha, love the vicar chastising!!

I'd chastise him even harder if he tried to invade my drive!

Hopefully you won't hear any more about this from your batty neighbour OP.

@5thnonblonde

Haven’t RTFT but as you rent that’s a great ‘out’. Explain you can’t sublet so she should contact your LL if she wishes to rent it, they own the drive and decide who uses it.

But make sure the LL knows that you don't want to share. She's quite likely to tell him you've agreed to it.

Passing the buck to the landlord would be a very perilous move. The LL might think it a great idea for generating more ££.

No need whatsoever to involve the LL anyway.

@EdgeOfTheSky absolutely right, no way would I risk giving up my lovely driveway! Pretty sure that'd break my contract anyway as the flat was advertised with the driveway- I wouldn't have taken it of it didn't have one

Oh god I’m even more unreasonable than you, I don’t even have a car and I’ve still refused to let my neighbour park in my parking space. Similar situation to you, he and his wife lived here before I did and they had taken to parking his car in my space. When I moved in, I asked them to stop. I don’t have a car but I have regular visitors and I paid for a flat with a parking space so I want it to be free for me to use, whenever I want to use it!

I sometimes feel guilty when the space is empty for days and he’s parked on the street. But I really really didn’t want to get into a situation where I had to text the neighbour to let him know I’ve got people coming over every time I wanted to use my own space!