To be a bit wtf at this home bargains christmas jumper?

[Effinell]

I seen this when I was in store today and it just didn't sit right with me. I do have a neurodiverse DD so that might be colouring my view slightly.

Meltdown is the word the autistic community prefers.

No one said they can't use it. Of course they can. Though not everyone prefers that term.

However, that doesn't mean they claim ita exclusive use and determine that it only applys to people who are ND.

It isn’t an unacceptable term - 85% have voted that the OP is being unreasonable.

About 200 people have said OP isn’t. I can use another word so what’s the problem. It doesn’t impact you what I do. HTH.

@GodIsAVegan - ok Hun, you do you, lol.

@AngelicaElizaAndPeggy

Meh. You could choose to expend energy being offended about it if you really wanted, I guess. But it doesn't personally bother me.

Great that it doesn’t bother you. But knowing that it is a really odd choice of phrasing, and is making a joke about something that causes a huge amount of distress, anxiety and hardship in the lives of autistic people is it still a wise choice of joke? It’s not about ‘choosing to be offended’ - we don’t make jokes at the expense of most marginalised people because we recognise it to be cruel and unecessary so why do it at the expense of autistics?

They can prefer it, but they can't own it.

Yep.

The jumper isn't poking fun at autistic people.

I say that as someone who is ND and have a child who is ND.

@saraclara

Meltdown is the word the autistic community prefers. Or are you going to decide for them how they should describe themselves?

They can prefer it, but they can't own it.

Absolutely fair enough. But knowing it might make someone who already has a really tough time of things feel a bit more marginalised, is a shit cheap jumper with a lazy joke really worth it? I wouldn’t be offended in particular if I saw it, but I absolutely recognise that folk would be. I do object to all the people basically saying ‘disabled people shut up! If you don’t find it funny you are wrong, oh and also tough shit you don’t get a voice in this’

@Moulesvinrouge1 I can not stand use of 'autistics' does that mean it should be banned? How many ND people does it take to not like it before its banned.

Do you think it's abelist to use 'autistics' because I don't like it?

The word 'meltdown' is a common usage word. People would only be offended if they, incorrectly, believe the ND community own the word.

But that could happen with anything. If I decided the ND community are going to use the word exhausted (as an example) to describe how I feel post meltdown. Does that mean I can be offended by anyone who uses it?

@sonjadog

Is the expression "having a meltdown" particularly related to autism? I had no idea. I thought it was a widely used expression.

Same. Don't think the word was invented for autism. Just commonly used together.

@Moulesvinrouge1 What about the ND and disabled people who think this is a ridiculous thing to make a fuss about?

[quote Darkpheonix]@Moulesvinrouge1 I can not stand use of 'autistics' does that mean it should be banned? How many ND people does it take to not like it before its banned.

Do you think it's abelist to use 'autistics' because I don't like it?

The word 'meltdown' is a common usage word. People would only be offended if they, incorrectly, believe the ND community own the word.

But that could happen with anything. If I decided the ND community are going to use the word exhausted (as an example) to describe how I feel post meltdown. Does that mean I can be offended by anyone who uses it?[/quote]
Meltdown is a common usage word, but it also has an added meaning that can and is commonly used to describe something distressing for people who are already marginalised. I’m agreeing with the OP that I don’t find it funny. Which I’m absolutely allowed to do. So many folk on this three saying ‘well I don’t understand why it’s not funny to some people so clearly it’s fine’

ok Hun, you do you, lol.

Why is it that you have an issue with OP trying to police peoples language but you think it’s ok to try to police mine? I’m not going to use the word again, that’s my choice. It’s weird that you’re so bothered by my choice. 🤡

[quote Innocenta]@Moulesvinrouge1 What about the ND and disabled people who think this is a ridiculous thing to make a fuss about? [/quote]
Good for them! Does everyone have to agree? Disabled people aren’t entirely homogeneous, believe it or not

@Moulesvinrouge1 As a disabled person, that was my point...

Meltdown is a common usage word, but it also has an added meaning that can and is commonly used to describe something distressing for people who are already marginalised. I’m agreeing with the OP that I don’t find it funny. Which I’m absolutely allowed to do. So many folk on this three saying ‘well I don’t understand why it’s not funny to some people so clearly it’s fine’

I don't recall telling you, you can't.

I am just addressing your points. Its common use outside the ND community, is far wider reaching the the ND use.

Infact, said snowman is having a meltdown closer to a nuclear meltdown than anything else.

Because a community uses a word it doesn't mean any usage of that word is making fun of them. That would mean the ND community have exclusive use. Which we don't.

[quote Innocenta]@Moulesvinrouge1 As a disabled person, that was my point... [/quote]
Says it all really, that someone who isn't disabled is determined to be offended on your behalf 🤔

@GreyhoundG1rl please show me where I said I wasn’t disabled

@GreyhoundG1rl This whole thing is so silly, isn't it? It's just a jumper! And the joke isn't even about autism - I can see why someone might be offended if it was, but... it isn't.

Makes me think that people who take offence at this kind of thing have no idea what it's like to face actual difficulties or prejudice due to life-changing disability, tbh. Ableism is real, but this isn't ableism. (And I know not every disabled person will agree with me, which is fine!)

@Darkpheonix

Meltdown is a common usage word, but it also has an added meaning that can and is commonly used to describe something distressing for people who are already marginalised. I’m agreeing with the OP that I don’t find it funny. Which I’m absolutely allowed to do. So many folk on this three saying ‘well I don’t understand why it’s not funny to some people so clearly it’s fine’

I don't recall telling you, you can't.

I am just addressing your points. Its common use outside the ND community, is far wider reaching the the ND use.

Infact, said snowman is having a meltdown closer to a nuclear meltdown than anything else.

Because a community uses a word it doesn't mean any usage of that word is making fun of them. That would mean the ND community have exclusive use. Which we don't.

I totally agree with you - I don’t think the jumper is deliberately making fun of autistic meltdowns. But the fact that there is a thread about it means it’s upsetting to some people who are either affected by autistic meltdowns or feel empathetic to their upset. The jumper slogan has made light of something that some people feel is really debilitating. That’s why we’re all talking about it, surely.

[quote Moulesvinrouge1]@GreyhoundG1rl please show me where I said I wasn’t disabled[/quote]
While you didn't overtly say you were not disabled, you did describe disabled people as 'them', and worded several posts in such a way as to other us, not as if you were included. Sure, maybe some poor wording - we've all been there! But you can't really blame the other poster for reading it that way. You also presumed I wasn't disabled in the way you responded to me, which, if you yourself are, isn't great...

[quote Innocenta]@GreyhoundG1rl This whole thing is so silly, isn't it? It's just a jumper! And the joke isn't even about autism - I can see why someone might be offended if it was, but... it isn't.

Makes me think that people who take offence at this kind of thing have no idea what it's like to face actual difficulties or prejudice due to life-changing disability, tbh. Ableism is real, but this isn't ableism. (And I know not every disabled person will agree with me, which is fine!) [/quote]
@Innocenta I have seen and experience daily ableism. I don’t think the jumper is ableist particularly, but what we are all talking about is that it’s making a joke, and some people find that joke painful, as it reminds them of something difficult in their life or that of their children or loved ones.

That’s the nuance we are debating.

@GodIsAVegan

It isn’t an unacceptable term - 85% have voted that the OP is being unreasonable.

About 200 people have said OP isn’t. I can use another word so what’s the problem. It doesn’t impact you what I do. HTH.

I voted yabu before reading, but now I think this might be a word I will only use with my nearest and dearest 😬. Definitely not on MN.

I'm not sure why you're trying to summarise the thread, @Moulesvinrouge1 - I have read it, just as you have. What I see is a reductive and controlling attempt to limit language usage, even though in this instance there isn't even any medical precedent for the term in question being linked to autism. There are grey area words where their usage now is offensive because of their origin, but almost no one currently using them has that in mind (e.g. 'moron'), but 'meltdown' just... is not what people are claiming. The claims being made in this thread are not true.

Also, if you experience 'daily' ableism, I'm very surprised that your response to me presumed I wasn't disabled.

@Innocenta thanks for your response, and apologies for confusion caused. My ‘them’ was intended to describe the people who thought this was a ridiculous thing to make a fuss about, rather than their status as ND or disabled, but I can see how it would read both ways.