To be a bit wtf at this home bargains christmas jumper?

[Effinell]

I seen this when I was in store today and it just didn't sit right with me. I do have a neurodiverse DD so that might be colouring my view slightly.

YABVU

I have an autistic child and wouldn't give it a single second's thought.

NT toddlers have tantrums, not meltdowns

I think this jumper is in rather poor taste, a bit like people flippantly saying they are"a bit OCD" when they just like clean and tidy house

@PinkyU

The issue is that the language has been appropriated by the NT community to mean a tantrum, and so now, the neurodiverse community have no language that expresses the biological phenomena that they actually experience during a “meltdown”.

And worse, when a ND person does experience a “meltdown” it’s conflated with tantrum and the ND person is not only not offered the correct support they are often judged and treated appallingly for “misbehaving”.

This is exactly what I was meaning but didn't have the words so thank you.

My DD pulls her own hair out and scratches herself red raw. That's not a tantrum.

Because I have neuro diverse children im sadly in a position to know the difference between tantrum and meltdown so while I would have found this funny prior to having my little gems these days I flinch from this because its my literal nightmare

[quote PinkyU]@Megan2018 if your child’s “meltdown” is hilarious they’re not having one, they’re having a tantrum.

If you actually had experience of a “meltdown” you’d feel as helpless and scared as I do when I watch my little girl pull her hair out till her scalp bleeds because she can’t cope with something I can’t hear, see or change for her.[/quote]
Was writing mine when you wrote yours. My child did have these meltdowns. The jumper would only bother me because it's probably artificial fibre and made in China.

@notanothertakeaway

NT toddlers have tantrums, not meltdowns

I think this jumper is in rather poor taste, a bit like people flippantly saying they are"a bit OCD" when they just like clean and tidy house

In your opinion maybe, but many many people use the words interchangeably and you can't just decide that they're wrong and then be offended by it.

I have an autistic child.. I don't have have an issue with this 🤷‍♀️

@Effinell my lo does that too, it’s really heartbreaking. My friends dd caused permanent damage to her eye and is now registered as partially sighted due to gouging at her face during a “meltdown”.

So, definitely not cute, funny or hilarious.

The problem is that 'meltdown' to mean an episode typical of someone with ASD isn't yet entrenched in our lexicon. It's not in the dictionary with that definition, it's a widely used term that people use on a daily basis. For those who have children with ASD or other SEN then it means something different, but to the vast majority of people it's just a normal word they use to mean an emotional outburst. Perhaps it'll become more mainstream as it's used more or perhaps another term will be invented specifically for that purpose so it can be used in a more clinical way as well.

Meltdown is not a medical term and does not exclusively exist for ND individuals

Tbh I understand where you're coming from, my DN is severely autistic with PDA and other Sen and I know meltdown is used a lot in relation to autism, but meltdown the word has been used long before the autism association and I think it's fine for neurotypical people to continue to use it. I'm not a fan of some groups coopting a word and making it unusuable for everyone else. I think the jumper is just harmless humour.

I agree @Effinell I don’t see anything funny about it.

NT people don’t have meltdowns. They have tantrums.

My Grandson is Autistic, his Mum is off to but this jumper tomorrow. I have epilepsy and the joke "what do you call a tree with epilepsy" doesn't bother me in the slightest. By the way the answer is Russell

I have meltdowns often when I’m flustered, exasperated, emotional, whatever. I don’t think the word is owned by autistic people, toddlers, nuclear reactors or any group in particular.

@DockOTheBay if you look at the evolution of the word to mean an altered physical or emotional state you’ll see it has its roots “mainly) in the autistic community and the proliferation of it within this community and with autistic experts, in autistic publications has culminated in it being appropriated by the NT community as a synonym for tantrum when it’s entire purpose was to differentiate between the two for the absolute benefit of ND people.

If you try hard enough you can be offended by it .
personally I see it relating to a snowman not autism .

@LowlandLucky - I don't get it. Can you explain?

@LowlandLucky

My Grandson is Autistic, his Mum is off to but this jumper tomorrow. I have epilepsy and the joke "what do you call a tree with epilepsy" doesn't bother me in the slightest. By the way the answer is Russell

That took me a moment

We're an autistic household and have unfortunately experienced the horrific meltdowns that PP describe.

However, I agree we don't own the word and I'm not even sure it originated in the neurodiverse community. I think melt down is a colloquialism that the autistic community has adopted as their own - but if you're not part of this world, you probably don't realise why it has such significance for us.

Melt down has been used by non-autistic folk for a long time, and I can't summon up even an ounce of outrage about this sweatshirt. And just to add, I'm autistic myself, along with my DC.

I do understand why some might be sensitive about it, but I think that's a "you" thing rather than the makers of the sweatshirt being unreasonable.

DS (AS) thinks it is hilarous - but then he loves playing with language.
And yes, he has had his share of "meltdowns" but does not like to be compared to a power plant malfunction, so he does not like this word.

@Effinell

I associate meltdown with autism but happy to accept that that's just me

@CorrBlimeyGG

Humour, like banter, it's OK as long as it's not taking the piss out of something important to you.

A meltdown isn't funny. It's certainly not for others to laugh at.

Who decides where a word/phrase should be used? It seems that you're wanting to hijack this common term and apply it to a specific condition. I have a t-shirt saying My Life's in Ruins, shall I get rid of it to avoid someone twisting it and taking offense?

@PinkyU

The issue is that the language has been appropriated by the NT community to mean a tantrum, and so now, the neurodiverse community have no language that expresses the biological phenomena that they actually experience during a “meltdown”.

And worse, when a ND person does experience a “meltdown” it’s conflated with tantrum and the ND person is not only not offered the correct support they are often judged and treated appallingly for “misbehaving”.

What?! Since when has it been exclusively a term for those with autism? It's definitely been around for toddlers a long time.

It's not a medical term and never has been.

The word was initially used for a phenomenon associated with nuclear reactors. It was then appropriated for the financial markets, and then eventually started being used for emotional/anger-related situations.