To be a bit wtf at this home bargains christmas jumper?

[Effinell]

I seen this when I was in store today and it just didn't sit right with me. I do have a neurodiverse DD so that might be colouring my view slightly.

RockNRollMartian
People have been using the term "meltdown" long before it was ever associated with autism. Sorry if it offends someone, but that's just life!

That’s true.

Please please kindly educate yourself

Honestly the ableism on this site is weird.

There's nothing ableist about pointing out the etymology of the word 'meltdown'. It initially referred to the melting of metal. It was then used by ice-cream manufacturers to describe the rate at which ice-cream liquefies. By the 1950s it was used to describe meltdowns in nuclear reactors. It has been used broadly synonymously with tantrum until the last 10-15 years when it has been given a more specific meaning. But you can't just erase the past meanings of the word or stop people using it.

I know what an autistic meltdown is. I'm not offended by people using the word 'meltdown' in other contexts. The jumper is tacky and nasty, but it's not ableist.

I do understand, though, when people get upset at the use of expressions such as 'totally OCD' to describe someone who, say, likes their books in alphabetical order, as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is a recognised medical condition. Using this expression minimises the seriousness of OCD. But 'meltdown' is simply a description. Nobody owns it.

Exactly.

Over and over and over again, it's been explained that meltdown, both in the nuclear sense and in the 'losing it' sense has been around for far longer than autism has been a diagnosis. And those of us who've been in the field since the early days can pretty much pinpoint when it started being used informally to differentiate an autistic response, from a toddler response to stress and overwhelming emotion.

But the point in time when it started being used that way did not signify that the word was now owned by the autistic community. Language changes.
I get that if you have an autistic child of school age you'll have heard the word used specifically for people with autism since you started on this journey. But it's not formal, it doesn't define the word in any way, and just as the language developed into using the word in this way, it's continuing to develop and expand into the neurotypical community. And that's okay.

You can't build a fence around the word and claim that it's yours.

Yeah you need to chill, much like the snowman on that jumper does OP.

@saraclara

So you have the same attitude towards other words and meanings... Yes?

I imagine if I was a sentient snow man, and the temperature was constantly above melting point, and I was having an existential crisis I would definitely have a meltdown.

I'm ND, but I do see the humour in this jumper.

I would wear it.

I think professional need to take some responsibility here. Meltdown was a long accepted term used by society not in reference to autism, we've only been using it widely in this way for the last 10 years and it really isn't helpful. When things are so important to a community they should use the medical term or a new term to describe them, using an established term only causes resentment on both sides, as seen here. Brainstorm for example was established for years in both work and education, in around 2004 we were told not to use it anymore because it could be offensive to nd communities, it was suggested we use thought shower instead.

[quote HonestwithHope1]@saraclara

So you have the same attitude towards other words and meanings... Yes?[/quote]

[quote HonestwithHope1]@saraclara

So you have the same attitude towards other words and meanings... Yes?[/quote]
You have to. Of course you do.

Sometimes it's annoying, of course, if a word you use often is lost from your vocabulary because it's appropriated elsewhere. But English has always done this. presumably you've read stuff written 100/200/300 years ago?

@HonestwithHope1 would you still describe something cheerful and fun as 'gay'? I grew up with that, then at some point had to find synonyms because it no longer worked.

Gay and Meltdown aren’t really comparable in terms of where they are in stages of language use changing.

Gay predominantly means homosexual to most people now, and even a dictionary will tell you that the happy meaning is outdated.

Whereas from the same dictionary, meltdown in the autism use isn’t in the first 2 definitions.

Not claiming that this one dictionary is definitive on current language use… but I do think it’s a fair example.

Maybe in a few years time meltdown will primarily be associated with specific behaviour related to autism. At that point, maybe we should look for other words. But today, that is not the case. In fact, perhaps those with autism will decide that they don’t like the term, because of the association with disaster and tantrum - and will prefer a better term. When I was a child, even the Spastics society used the word “spastic” - it’s completely unacceptable now. Perhaps those with autism will choose not to use the word meltdown 🤷🏻‍♀️

@22:40BertramLacey

Haha oh hun. But that isn't what's being discussed. This thread has turned into non disabled/neurotypicalpeople moaning that language dare change and that there's an adequete word to describe something that ... Previously didn't have a word due to these people being isolated from society and not ever seen.

It's simple

Tantrum: something small children do in moments of frustration, not having communication skills to explain, lacking emotional regulation skills due to immaturity wanting something

Something a spoiled adult can throw for effect, manipulation, to get own way ect

Tantrums have a goal and can be stopped willingly. Most people grow out of tantrumming once they can understand and communicate.

Meltdown: something only neurodivergent/disabled people do. It is for most part uncontrollable and can lead to disproportionate responses, self harm ect. Meltdowns can be 'triggered' by anything that overwhelmes, frightens ect a person. Once in a meltdown, it cannot be stopped. The person themselves 'burns out' temporarily dus to meltdown and some people may not actually remember* their meltdown

There's more to it but that's the basics. So yeah. The ableistic attitude towards ND/Disabled people daring to appropriate a word is ableistic.

@saraclara

And i'm now terribly confused. How on earth can you use gay-happy example.... When I'm here saying

In modern times we have started using meltdown to refer to ND/Disabled peoples ... Responses. Not tantrum

We started using that word professionally and soccially because disabled people/ND are now more present in society and we needed an adequate word to describe. See above for diff definitions and why tantrum wouldn't be appropriate

You yourself seem to agree words change with meaning/context and change who uses them in what situation so i honestly don't know wtf you are on about ...

we have started using meltdown to refer to ND/Disabled peoples ... Responses
But not exclusively.

@HonestwithHope1 in order to change the meaning of a word or phrase you need the whole of society to agree. What doesnt work is a small group co opting a phrase then getting in a strop that the rest of society doesnt just fall in line.

Tantrums have a goal and can be stopped willingly. Most people grow out of tantrumming once they can understand and communicate.

No they don't. Most two year olds having a tantrum can't just stop. Certainly my Dd couldn't. Screaming because they can't have some chocolate and stopping when you give it to them is one thing, but many toddlers don't operate that way at all. They are simply overwhelmed in the same way that an older child with autism is.

A child who is NT does grow out of them as their communication improves, (and many of my autistic pupils also had far fewer meltdowns as our work on their communication came to fruition). But while the effects of an older ND child's meltdowns are much worse and more dramatic and difficult to manage), the emotions behind them are not so different from some 2 year olds'.

@BlackeyedSusan

Gosh it's just like there isn't this whole news story about racism in cricket being dismissed as banter for so long. Much the same happening here. NT people claiming it's just a joke just like white people dismiss racism.

As a mixed race person bugger off comparing this with racism; you're trying to be on our side but are just showing your ignorance.

i agree
as a parent of 2 children with complex needs each and asd included for both.
i too would have taken offence

@BlackeyedSusan

Gosh it's just like there isn't this whole news story about racism in cricket being dismissed as banter for so long. Much the same happening here. NT people claiming it's just a joke just like white people dismiss racism.

Oh do fuck off with this comment already. Like the brouhaha over an inoffensive word on a Christmas jumper by a group of easily offended mumsnetters can be compared to decades of abhorrent racism in sport. 🙄😬 FFS.

I didn’t realise meltdown wasn’t an acceptable term. But happy to not use it again now, there’s other words which won’t offend anyone so seems an easy change to make.

My neurodiverse dd would bloody love that.

It's not at funny as my 'I put the sexy into dyslexia' t shirt but as an adult with asd, dealing with the fun that is Christmas planning, it is quite accurate for my head space this time of year.

I didn't know this was exclusively used for autism , and I'm sure I'm not alone. I use it to describe someone of any age, who is out of control due to being overwhelmed . You can't just decided that a word can only relate to one circumstance, that isn't how language works.

Yabu
You're overly woke
It's some harmless fun

A meltdown isn't just what kids with asd have. We all have them. Mostly at Christmas haha

This is the second definition of the word meltdown in the OED:

[uncountable, countable] (economics) a situation where something fails or becomes weaker in a sudden or dramatic way:
The country is in economic meltdown.
a meltdown on the New York Stock Exchange

A snowman melting would make it weaker in a dramatic way. Therefore this jumper is very on point.

The first definition in OED refers to nuclear.

The third:

(informal) a loss of control over your emotions that happens very fast:
My little brother had a meltdown when he couldn’t get a new toy.

No reference to autism whatsoever.

ND people don't get to own the word meltdown and need to stop taking offence when others use it in a grammatically correct way.