Girls having to say when they have their period

[Cliff1975]

My daughter is 13, year 8. On friday she got into trouble for answering a teacher back and arguing (agree totally out of order). However, it was over asking to go to the toilet in PE, 5 minutes after lunch (although it was after they had changed so can't have been 5 minutes. Anyway it all escalated out of proportion but my question is this, is it reasonable for a teacher to say that if agirl says it is her time of the month she will be allowed to go if not no. I mean why should they have to share this? Ho will the teacher know if they are being truthful anyway? My daughter, who is no shrinking violet was mortified that the teacher ended up shouting this with about 5 teachers present. I have told her not to answer back, argue etc but I have to admit part of me is proud of her. Some girls would be mortified being asked if it is the time of the month. Honest opinions please. I was a teacher myself for 20 years so I know kids try it on to get out of lesson but is that worth humiliating girls for who are genuine? I can't help thinking this is a power tri p for the teacher.

It is a you problem. You have said you are unable to understand why it can be a problem. That's quite a huge part of thinking ability to be lacking. It's defo you.
Yes, I am absolutely unable to see why it's a problem if others know that a girl is on their period. Please explain why you think it's such a problem, instead of lamely repeating that it's somehow a lack of critical thinking.
Where exactly is the problem for a girl? Girls have periods - everyone knows this. Why is it so apparently 'humiliating' if someone finds out?
Are these shrinking violets equally 'humiliated' if the rest of the class knows they need a wee, or a poo? Somehow I don't think so. Why is a period any different?
I also agree with the poster who pointed out that it's very disruptive for the whole class if more than one child needs the toilet during lessons. Children, even teens, are prone to copycat behaviour, and multiple children asking to go to the toilet can quickly escalate into a discipline problem for the teacher.

Yes, I am absolutely unable to see why it's a problem if others know that a girl is on their period.

Please explain why you think it's such a problem, instead of lamely repeating that it's somehow a lack of critical thinking.

It is a lack of critical thinking. A huge lack.

@Harriet1216 Young girls have a right to basic privacy over what's happening with their bodies. It's really as simple as that.

:34claymodels

It is a lack of critical thinking. A huge lack.
So, no proper answer then? You really can't give me a reason why you think it's humiliating if others know that a girl is on her period, can you?

There's no reason to engage with you any further.

@Harriet1216 if you were in a work meeting would you say “ I’m going to the toilet” or would you specify what you’re doing in there “I need to defecate”, “I need to urinate” or “ I need to change my sanitary towel”.

@Harriet1216

:34claymodels

It is a lack of critical thinking. A huge lack.
So, no proper answer then? You really can't give me a reason why you think it's humiliating if others know that a girl is on her period, can you?

There's no reason to engage with you any further.

I could spend all day explaining this but it would be futile.

@Tittyfilarious81

As I've said a few times now it was introduced because of understandable upset from the girls ,nobody is allowed to go to the toilet during lessons there are ample toilets and plenty of opportunities during the day to go but obviously on a period girls may need to go at other times . The pass is not just for periods it doesn't mean period, there are several reasons for the pass period , tummy ache ,feeling unwell ,water infection etc some boys have them also but very few so nobody goes oh look she's on a period .

Oh phew, that's just fine then. If it's not a period its something equally as private.

For the record back in the 80s when I was at school I never drank anything. Because of these stupid draconian rules. I always got home almost pissing myself such was my dislike of the girls toilets.

As a knock on effect I have fuck all bladder control, now when I need to go theres no waiting.

You would hope in the intervening years an actual solution would have been found, but it appears many more girls will grow up with similar issues.

At home, me or DD have leaked onto the bedding or a cushion, and just put the stained item in to soak and given it a wash etc, had a shower, got changed, no probs . It would be a lot more embarrassing if it had happened at school or a seat on public transport, or at work, or visiting a friends house because it draws attention, and then feel less in control than in a home environment, when I can easily sort out any "period dramas" as we refer to them, without an audience.

@Sweetandsaltycaroline

At home, me or DD have leaked onto the bedding or a cushion, and just put the stained item in to soak and given it a wash etc, had a shower, got changed, no probs . It would be a lot more embarrassing if it had happened at school or a seat on public transport, or at work, or visiting a friends house because it draws attention, and then feel less in control than in a home environment, when I can easily sort out any "period dramas" as we refer to them, without an audience.

So do you keep your dd at home when she has a period then?

It's just claymodels opinion that periods must be mentioned. Others have different opinions, including my dds.

*Must Not be mentioned!

@Pippi1970

It's just claymodels opinion that periods must be mentioned. Others have different opinions, including my dds.

What on earth are you talking about?

Oh yes, I see a typo, that makes more sense.

Now, what on earth are you talking about?

Even with the typo I haven't said that.

I have said, consistently, that pupils should not have to explain why they need the toilet not should such a request be refused.

I am realise that some people, like your daughter, don't mind mentioning their periods. The issue is you can't realise that some girls don't feel ok to do that. We covered this absolutely ages ago though so I'm not sure why you are raising the same issue?

So do you keep your dd at home when she has a period then?

No I don't. But I'm trying to explain that while periods are not something to be ashamed of its understandable that they can cause embarrassment.

It's a basic human right to be able to use a toilet when you need to.

As I said upthread, I'm really anti draconian toilet policies in school. It may be wrong and counter productive to learning to prevent children going to the toilet, but is doesn't breech human rights ffs. Some workplaces limit toilet access too. Teaching, for instance. Bus driving. Some call centres (including government ones).

@ChloeCrocodile

It's a basic human right to be able to use a toilet when you need to.

As I said upthread, I'm really anti draconian toilet policies in school. It may be wrong and counter productive to learning to prevent children going to the toilet, but is doesn't breech human rights ffs. Some workplaces limit toilet access too. Teaching, for instance. Bus driving. Some call centres (including government ones).

Actually the UK government does 'recognise sanitation as a human right under international law'

@claymodels yes but that doesnt mean instant access to a toilet does it?

[quote Porcupineintherough]@claymodels yes but that doesnt mean instant access to a toilet does it?[/quote]

What does it mean then? Access to sanitation except where your teacher decides otherwise?

No. Access to sanitation means just that. Access. Nobody should be denied the toilet.

‘The human right to sanitation was explicitly recognized as a distinct right by the UN General Assembly in 2015. (UN, 2016)‘

www.unwater.org/water-facts/human-rights/

Teachers do not have the right to deny children their human rights because ‘it would be annoying if every body did it’

Access to sanitation is a human right. I don’t see where it says at your teachers convenience or whim

Teachers should not be allowed an opinion on whether a child bleeding affects them or not. "The teacher will be in a bad mood if they ask to go 5 minutes into a lesson" what possible bearing on a grown ups mind should a child menstruating have? Fucking baffling.

I can't understand why there appear to be so many girls who are frightened of anyone knowing they are on their period. What are the terrible consequences

Kids like to bully other kids. I was once doing PE and had mud all over my tracksuit bottoms. Another girl (who was generally a cow) said "oh you've bled all over your bottoms ha ha so funny". I wasn't bothered by her because I knew it was mud and not my period, but it's an example of how nasty girls can be to other girls.

Access to sanitation is a human right. I don’t see where it says at your teachers convenience or whim

Precisely.

No I don't. But I'm trying to explain that while periods are not something to be ashamed of its understandable that they can cause embarrassment.

Exactly. And the same applies to most bodily functions. Defecating isn’t anything to be ashamed of, all healthy people do it, but I still wouldn’t expect anyone - either at school or in the workplace - to say ‘excuse me, I really need to go and have a poo’ in order to be permitted to use the toilet.

@ChloeCrocodile

It's a basic human right to be able to use a toilet when you need to.

As I said upthread, I'm really anti draconian toilet policies in school. It may be wrong and counter productive to learning to prevent children going to the toilet, but is doesn't breech human rights ffs. Some workplaces limit toilet access too. Teaching, for instance. Bus driving. Some call centres (including government ones).

One of our local bus routes has a driver toilet stop.

Every time I worked in a call centre we were grudgingly allowed timed toilet breaks because it IS the law that they have to let you access the toilet when necessary