Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Neighbour and neighbour’s friend parking on my driveway without asking

482 replies

changeyourname11111 · 06/11/2021 07:17

About a week ago I looked out of the window one afternoon and noticed that my neighbour’s car was on my drive.

I went round to ask about it and he said that the lady who lives next to him was having people over (weekly occurrence - a bridge party) and that one of her friends had asked to park on his drive so he had parked on mine. He said sorry, he had thought I was out at work Hmm.

The lady who lives next to him is very elderly and I get on with both her and my immediate neighbour so I said ok (not to this being regular though).

However this week, my kids (I am a single parent) were at home and texted me at work to say that there was a random car on our drive (on the same afternoon as the week before I think) and sent me a photo of it.

I assume that this is now the bridge friend parking on my drive, but am annoyed that no one asked for our permission.

The lady in question has her car on the street and a small drive of her own so I assume she must have had two friends over. There is pay and display across the street which is always free but on the other hand maybe the pay by phone is hard to navigate.

I’ve been really busy at work so wasn’t able to go round to either neighbour’s house, but today am
going to speak to both neighbours.

I am torn as to whether I should say just a blanket no to using our (small) drive (we don’t currently have a car), or whether I should say ok as long as they ask first (the lady has my number, my immediate neighbour doesn’t but I will give it to him). I have a feeling that if I say ask first they will not bother and just park there.

Anyway, aibu to think that it is really rude to do this?? Am lying in bed feeling increasingly annoyed about it Grin.

And would you ask them to ask first or just say a blanket no?

OP posts:
Shade17 · 16/02/2022 10:56

Pop a sign up on your garage door - “private property, clamping in operation - £100 release fee”

Saves you having to buy a bollard. And only invest in a clamp if they ignore the sign. The probably wouldn’t risk it!

Of course they’ll ignore it. Most people know that clamping on private land is a criminal offence. They know they won’t get clamped!

Quincythequince · 16/02/2022 10:57

@Shade17

You can indeed report a car as being illegally parked (on private property) and put wheels in motion to have it moved.

Of course you can.

If some randomer just dumped an old car on my driveway and never came back for it, are you saying itjqould have to stay there? It wouldn’t.

Yes, of course you can. But I’d imagine the game of bridge will have finished by the time you get a court order allowing you to have it removed. My point was that you can’t just call a towing company and have it towed.

Yes you can. You’d have to pay for it yourself, and you couldn’t have the car impounded or withheld, and you’d have to tow it into public property, but you can pay to have it moved!

It’s perfectly legal, you just need to make sure no damage to the vehicle is incurred as you could then be pursued (legally) for that!

Quincythequince · 16/02/2022 10:58

You don’t need a court order to have something removed from your private property.

You would however need for them to be parked longer for it to be dealt with civilly as trespassing.

Still doesn’t mean that it’s not trespassing though.

People should know their rights.

InaccurateDream · 16/02/2022 10:59

Ignore the people bleating about kindness when they haven’t read the whole thread. It would never occur to me to park on someone else’s drive. It’s your property! They took advantage and they didn’t communicate. So they’ve lost their chance at goodwill. How many posters here would give up their drive in that situation?

Bollard or chain or rocks all the way. Let us know how it goes.

I know full well how resentment can build up. I used to have a neighbour who would park on the grass verge in front of my house, instead of her own drive. Technically allowed but why??? It caused so much frustration!

Shade17 · 16/02/2022 11:06

Yes you can.
You’d have to pay for it yourself, and you couldn’t have the car impounded or withheld, and you’d have to tow it into public property, but you can pay to have it moved!

It’s perfectly legal, you just need to make sure no damage to the vehicle is incurred as you could then be pursued (legally) for that!

This is what the police have to say about that course of action:

Under no circumstances would we advocate you merely pushing the vehicle onto a road and leaving it there, as you may commit a number of offences.

I certainly wouldn’t be doing it without taking legal advice first

JudgeJ · 16/02/2022 11:06

@BigPlanes

I’d be fine with it. I have a large drive and only one car whereas neighbours have smaller drives. Regularly offer use of it if it’s useful.
That's a different situation, you are offering the use of your drive, I do the same thing as I too have a very large drive and one car. My lovely neighbour knocked on the door to apologise that his girlfriend's car was overhanging my drive, I told him to stick it on the drive. These people aren't waiting to be offered or even asking!
JudgeJ · 16/02/2022 11:09

@SpinningTheSeedsOfLove

How dangerous could an elderly lady be?

Try me

And I've got your back!
Quincythequince · 16/02/2022 11:10

@Shade17

Yes you can. You’d have to pay for it yourself, and you couldn’t have the car impounded or withheld, and you’d have to tow it into public property, but you can pay to have it moved!

It’s perfectly legal, you just need to make sure no damage to the vehicle is incurred as you could then be pursued (legally) for that!

This is what the police have to say about that course of action:

Under no circumstances would we advocate you merely pushing the vehicle onto a road and leaving it there, as you may commit a number of offences.

I certainly wouldn’t be doing it without taking legal advice first

They advocate that you don’t because they don’t want to have to deal with the potential escalation or for you to commit a criminal offence by not doing it properly. But your are well within your rights legally to do so and if you had the time, and resource and for a tow company to do this, you wouldn’t be breaking the law. You are posting inaccurate information. Your mention of clamping on private property is of course illegal, although I bet plenty wouldn’t know that.
EmmaH2022 · 16/02/2022 11:13

@changeyourname11111

It’s also not clear if the car was still on your drive.

No it wasn’t, it was the next day.

I guess the whole thing feels like it might be a storm in a teacup – in the sense that to be so adamant that no one can park there seems rude, that’s probably why I didn’t say anything. But I will get the bollard installed.

I just can’t imagine a situation where I would park (several times) in front of their house without asking - sulk when they said no, and do it again anyway without asking.

Totally with you OP

Shame you have to fork out for a bollard. Bloody CFs.

Noisyprat · 16/02/2022 11:14

The problem with 'being kind' is that it leads to people really taking the piss. This is why I have zero tolerance rule. I would never dream of parking on my neighbours drive or telling my friends or a random they can so don't expect other people to do it.

OP, I would tell them again that they must not park on your drive. If they do it again can you get someone to block the car in?

Nsky · 16/02/2022 11:16

I live very near a station, I’d rent my space out, if I didn’t have a car, few others in cul de sac, have had strange cars, a strongly worded note normally fixes stuff

Barney60 · 16/02/2022 11:35

Personally, I don't think anyone should be driving if they're unable to figure out how to use a public pay and display car park even if it is pay by phone!

Nonsense, i personally dont use a mobile phone bar for break down cover, i know a few that are the same!
I use a tablet at home for all internet use. Hardly likely to cart that about!

Im in the NO camp, not to upset neighbour but i think do it once theres a possibility of them taking advantage in the future, maybe grandchildren, parents, nursing care ect as time goes on.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy · 16/02/2022 11:53

Hang on, you don't have a car?

Why would you object to your neighbour using your driveway when you clearly don't need it?

how awkward would it have been if the person parking the car had got out at the same time as my kids getting home and they would have been faced with having to interact with a stranger randomly at their house with no permission

This makes no sense. What interaction? They are not coming inside your house. Are your children able to walk past strangers in the street?

But having said that, it's your driveway so you call tell you neighbour to clear off if you want.

bluebell34567 · 16/02/2022 11:55

@Skyla2005

Big pots with plants
very good idea.
Easterbunnyiswindowshopping · 16/02/2022 11:56

Op may have a second bathroom she doesn't use but doesn't mean she wants ndn washing their arse cracks in it.
.
Keep the Cfers off op.

DePfeffoff · 16/02/2022 11:59

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

Hang on, you don't have a car?

Why would you object to your neighbour using your driveway when you clearly don't need it?

how awkward would it have been if the person parking the car had got out at the same time as my kids getting home and they would have been faced with having to interact with a stranger randomly at their house with no permission

This makes no sense. What interaction? They are not coming inside your house. Are your children able to walk past strangers in the street?

But having said that, it's your driveway so you call tell you neighbour to clear off if you want.

Do you need your garden or indeed your house when you're out? Would you be happy to have all the neighbours using them whenever they fancy?

How about the scenario where, say, an ambulance or fire engine needs to get close to the house and can't because neighbour's car is in the way? Or one of the family is injured, needs a taxi to get to hospital but can't hobble more than a few feet? Or OP or her children have a visitor who can't walk far?

Flickflak · 16/02/2022 12:00

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

WeAreTheHeroes · 16/02/2022 12:00

@GreenFingersWouldBeHandy

Hang on, you don't have a car?

Why would you object to your neighbour using your driveway when you clearly don't need it?

how awkward would it have been if the person parking the car had got out at the same time as my kids getting home and they would have been faced with having to interact with a stranger randomly at their house with no permission

This makes no sense. What interaction? They are not coming inside your house. Are your children able to walk past strangers in the street?

But having said that, it's your driveway so you call tell you neighbour to clear off if you want.

Hang on, I have a garden I'm not sitting in at the moment. Does that mean one of the neighbours can come and use it instead? Of course not.
Tulips21 · 16/02/2022 12:00

A total No.
CF

MinnieGirl · 16/02/2022 12:00

I can’t believe they have started this again!
You told them no! You shouldn’t have all this for goodness sake, it’s your property…

Personally, I would go over to the elderly lady and say that you had one of her friends park on your drive again. Pause there, and see what she says…… I would then add that you had previously made it very clear that your drive was private property, and no one is to park there.

It’s only happened once so far, so try to nip it in the bud. If it happens again then a bin or a planter or a bollard.

Abigail12345654321 · 16/02/2022 12:01

@tkwal

If you were to agree to her friend parking during that specific time slot , I would see it as a neighbourly small act of kindness.
Not clear what point you are trying to make. Op has already decided not to do that. She isn’t obliged to ‘be kind’ when others have behaved badly. When kindness and consideration isn’t reciprocated, it is reasonable to withdraw it.
Kennykenkencat · 16/02/2022 12:08

@Noisyprat

The problem with 'being kind' is that it leads to people really taking the piss. This is why I have zero tolerance rule. I would never dream of parking on my neighbours drive or telling my friends or a random they can so don't expect other people to do it.

OP, I would tell them again that they must not park on your drive. If they do it again can you get someone to block the car in?

Agree

CFs. I think this is where the saying No good deed goes unpunished is appropriate

Sign up to a pay to park website and tell the cf neighbours they can tell their friends that they need to go through the app if they want to park on your driveway.
They will be towed if they don’t pay as it is private property.

Jux · 16/02/2022 12:16

Chain across, with small padlock at one side - not obvious and not ugly.

WheresThatCatGoneNow · 16/02/2022 12:17

Well, if you dont have a car at the moment, so aren't using your drive, I would be inclined to let them use it.

If only to encourage good neighbour relations.

I don't have a car either, but have a driveway that can easily accommodate four cars.

My neighbour's SIL has had a white Ford Transit Van parked on my drive since last September.

I don't mind. It's not in anyone's way, and, in return, the neighbour's SIL is maintaining my garden and hedges for me.

Is it really a problem if you don't actually need to use your driveway yourself?

2beautifulbabs · 16/02/2022 12:24

No chance would I be allowing anyone to park on my driveway op I dare say this but heaven forbid what if the person had a mis slip of the accelerator and crashed into your house or done some damage to your property while using it when they shouldn't.
Read so many horror stories of people getting confused with brake pedals and accelerator pedals.

I agree with what everyone else has said clearly they are going to continue doing so regardless how many words you have with them I would look at having parking mole post installed they can't move it or put it down etc.

I wouldn't have any more words it sounds like it will just result in further issues better to just resort to putting a fixture on your driveway to stop them using it.