To have been offended by this in the play centre.

[spidermummy19]

Took DS to the play centre this afternoon. He wanted me to video him coming down a slide which I did. Straight away a member of staff came over and said “do you not know the rules?” I said “no sorry, what rules?” She said “you’re not allowed to take photos or videos of children in here” I apologised and told her I didn’t know that. I genuinely didn’t, I have never and wouldn’t have taken the video if there was another child near him. But there wasn’t, there were only roughly 4 other parents in the play centre and none of the other kids were anywhere near him. She then said “it’s the fact that you could be anyone” I was highly offended and was left to feel really uncomfortable after it.

I've been to loooads of soft plays and none of them have had this rule! I think it's overkill, it's not like a nursery or anything.

And re places which don’t have this rule, just watch and see. It will be standard practice before you know it.
Running a soft play centre has all kinds of rules, regulations and best practices. Some places are always quicker and hotter on things, but usually these things quickly become the norm.

I wonder if in 5 years time, anyone would be surprised or question why this was a rule. To be honest, I’m surprised people do today, but clearly, assuming when you talk about your soft play experiences, snd they are recent, not everywhere is telling parents not to do this.

It would be nice if every woman with a small child in a place that caters for small children was purely there’s for the enjoyment of her child and had no ulterior motive. Just in the same way it would be nice if all the nice middle aged, kind helpers at youth groups and Scouts and Brownies had always been there purely to make fun times for kids, or all teachers who ever taught were only there to educate children. Sadly it’s not the case. Some people have an unhealthy interest in children and they will gravitate towards places with children. We have so many more measures these days to help keep children safer. That’s a good thing, not just an annoyance to spoil your fun and picture taking. Of course the vast vast majority of people are exactly who they say they are, ir who they say they are with no ulterior motives. But how much news have you not seen to not have any broader sense of some of the disturbing things that happen?

@Magicalwoodlands

Taking photographs in a soft play centre is not a child protection issue and it does nothing to make children safer.

I hate this daft approach to what safeguarding actually means.

That isn't true. There are many children whose parents have to control the photos of their children on social media very carefully. Usually because they've either been abused or they're at risk of abuse and/or abduction.

Private businesses can enforce their own rules so those children can play safely.

I can understand your point of view, OP, if you are just anyone does that mean that you can’t take your child home at the end if you are just anyone? Because that’s what that implies.

@Clymene the onus is on these parents to put in the additional safeguards needed to.

You cannot never take a photograph of your child in public for fear that someone else’s vulnerable child may be in the background. That clearly is not reasonable.

I work in safeguarding at a high level. I know the safeguards that should be in place for adopted children and so on. But that does not equate to no one taking a picture of their own child in public ‘in case.’

Sudo, but paedophiles ARE known to have photos of fully clothed children in these kind of places and they DO get off on it. It happens.

They could just as easily take pictures in a park or a shopping mall or fun fair… we can’t reasonably ask people to not take photos for this kind of reason and cast a vail of suspicion over anyone who simply wants a picture of their own child when they’re having a day out

My friend fosters and cannot have any photos of those children on social media in case relatives are able to track them down. All it would take would be for one of them to wander into shot and then you to post it on FB to have serious consequences.

I think it’s a good rule, I see loads of soft play photos on social media and there’s kids in the background, what if those children are being protected? Protected from domestic abusers where their mother has fled or are fostered/adopted and their location being kept under wraps, it’s just not worth it IMO, yes you were careful not to include any other children but loads of people aren’t.

She didn’t word it well, but yes you could be anyone - hence the rule. Being offended by that is ridiculously snowflake.

@Herewegoagain84 snowflake🤦🏻‍♀️ And exactly, she didn’t word it well hence the reason for me being offended

Maybe I should stop all the mums and dads in the park that are taking videos/pictures of their children in the future. I guess they are stupid like me too

No because that's out in public. Businesses and organisations involved with children have to keep them safe.

And it is true paedophiles will use pictures of fully clothed children.
I've done some training around it as I work with young people with a sports setting.
Different rules and policies in different places but where I am you cannot even take videos or pictures of your children performing in a team event for the same reasons.

Sadly, pictures have been found in possession of paedophiles which include fully clothed children playing in soft plays, dance shows and sporting events. It happens.
Pedo's are known to hang out near playgrounds,softplays and any places children go to...even just to snap a quick photo from the street.
There are so many of them out there.
We can never be too careful and sadly in the age we live In ,those photos can be halfway around the globe in 5 minutes . Even if the children are fully dressed,would you like to know some animal is looking at a photo of your child?

I don't think it's unreasonable that you were asked to stop filming if it's their policy... however, they way she asked you was terrible and I would've been absolutely mortified!
Hope you're ok OP!

I agree it's insane any thought even had to go into something as simple as photos at soft play/events but here we are. The scumbags are out there, theres a reason the rules were put there.

@november90 thank you, that’s my point. I have no issue with their policy, hence with me apologising and stopping filming. But to be made to feel like some kind of monster for filming my own child having fun, that was my issue. There were plenty of other ways she could have approached the situation

[quote Magicalwoodlands]@Clymene the onus is on these parents to put in the additional safeguards needed to.

You cannot never take a photograph of your child in public for fear that someone else’s vulnerable child may be in the background. That clearly is not reasonable.

I work in safeguarding at a high level. I know the safeguards that should be in place for adopted children and so on. But that does not equate to no one taking a picture of their own child in public ‘in case.’[/quote]
It's not 'in public'. It's a privately owned business. So they can put whichever rules they like in place to make the small minority of parents who have to be vigilant relax.

As I'm sure you are aware, being as you work at a high level and all.

They can put in place whatever rules they like but they are not blanket rules and they do absolutely nothing to keep children safe.

The playcentre is right, and the staff member was right to bring it up with you.
Now you know, so nothing to worry about.

She could have worded it much better

@Magicalwoodlands

They can put in place whatever rules they like but they are not blanket rules and they do absolutely nothing to keep children safe.

Absolutely correct sadly

She then said “it’s the fact that you could be anyone” I was highly offended and was left to feel really uncomfortable after it.

But how would you feel if some other random person had taken a picture or video of your DC?

It’s pretty straightforward common sense safeguarding.

@Magicalwoodlands

They can put in place whatever rules they like but they are not blanket rules and they do absolutely nothing to keep children safe.

No they're not blanket rules.

Do you think schools should ditch asking permission of parents to take photos of their kids?

“you’re not allowed to take photos or videos of children in here” I apologised and told her I didn’t know that. I genuinely didn’t, I have never and wouldn’t have taken the video if there was another child near him. But there wasn’t, there were only roughly 4 other parents in the play centre and none of the other kids were anywhere near him. She then said “it’s the fact that you could be anyone” I was highly offended and was left to feel really uncomfortable after it.

how are you offended by that? here's a grip, i think you need it more than me

@spidermummy19

I’m more offended by the “you could be anyone” comment.

It wasn't a very useful comment, or terribly polite, but it is true - you could be anyone and I wouldn't be offended by that myself.

@BonesInTheOcean I’m alright thanks☺️

But you could be anyone!!