To have been offended by this in the play centre.

[spidermummy19]

Took DS to the play centre this afternoon. He wanted me to video him coming down a slide which I did. Straight away a member of staff came over and said “do you not know the rules?” I said “no sorry, what rules?” She said “you’re not allowed to take photos or videos of children in here” I apologised and told her I didn’t know that. I genuinely didn’t, I have never and wouldn’t have taken the video if there was another child near him. But there wasn’t, there were only roughly 4 other parents in the play centre and none of the other kids were anywhere near him. She then said “it’s the fact that you could be anyone” I was highly offended and was left to feel really uncomfortable after it.

Since you had already complied, her words strike me as needlessly rude tbh

You could be anyone though. The staff have no idea who is who's child.

I doubt she was being personal and suggesting YOU could be anyone. More likely a generic you as in someone, meaning they have no way of monitoring who is legit, so a blanket rule is safest. I'm sure she knew it was your own DC, but was right imo to keep to the rules, as that's obviously what her employer has told her to do. Its all very well those people calling her a jobsworth as an insult. People actually do get sacked for not following procedures, and she probably does think her jobs worth more than that

Tbh I think YABU, the employee doesn't know you as a person so to them you could literally be anyone. I understand why you were probably a bit embarrassed at being confronted but really if that was me I would be glad the employee reacted like that as that rule may one day protect your child. It doesn't matter that there wasn't many other people around, one rule for one, one rule for all.

I just thought with him shouting “mummy” they’d know that I’m his mum and not “anyone” But ok, I was in the wrong and I now know not to take pictures of my child in places like play centres

if that was me I would be glad the employee reacted like that good point. I got challenged by a staff member who'd not met me at nursery pick up and they were so apologetic. I told them I was glad they'd followed their procedures as I could have been anyone!

@Wolfiefan

Not rude. They were probably taken aback that a parent didn’t know this basic safeguarding precaution.

It’s not a rule at the soft play closest to where I live. And to be honest, even if it was a widely known rule, OP is a customer so “do you not know the rules” is a little rude.

I wouldn't be offended at all, that's a pretty usual rule. I might well have felt silly or embarrassed that I hadn't realised it was the rule but that would be my mistake

Are you always this easily offended and upset?

If you are, life must be quite trying really.

The point ‘you could be anyone’ means quite simply, that although you’re a genuine parent taking pictures, there’s no way of them knowing that…that’s the reason for the rule. It was an explanation of WHY no photos are allowed by anyone. People who get off on pics of little kids, could look just like you. It wasn’t making any comment our insinuation about you at all.

These things happen all the time. Most of us do things we aren’t supposed to unknowingly and someone points it out to us, it’s just life. Sometimes people get the tone a bit harsh and sometimes people are overly sensitive to it, but wither way, it really isn’t a big deal and you just apologise and move forward. End of.

If you’re upset by this, you will probably find lots to be offended by when you have dealings with schools or the Doctor surgery, or all kinds of public places.

Don’t worry. Mistakes happen all the time and it’s not a big deal, in that you’ve not done something terrible to dwell on, plus the staff member hasn’t done anything inappropriate or unkind either.

Please don’t build up a grudge in your mind about this soft play place or that member of staff, or the people on here suggesting you’re being overly sensitive. You just need to be able to move on from things quickly and not let piddly little things gs escalate in your mind.

Well you could be anyone , they don't know.

@spidermummy19

I’m more offended by the “you could be anyone” comment.

But she was right?

@WombatChocolate No not really. Just don’t like the fact I was made to feel like a pedo

Arent you happy they are taking NO CHANCES with anyone??? I would. They are doing their job .

@spidermummy19

I get what you mean about the way she worded it. It definitely could have been phrased more sensitively.

I only watched a predator exposure thing last night where a woman was finding kids for her boyfriend to abuse. It happens. You could indeed be anyone. You are not, thankfully. But this is how it is. We need to protect kids this much.

she probably added in the 'you could be anyone' comment in reaction to your lack of awareness.did you look blank for a few seconds whilst you thought it through?

you know women can be sex offenders don't you?

Standard policy??? 4 local soft plays, all in London, all allow photos to be taken, it's certainly not a standard policy here. And if it is a standard rule where you live its a stupid one, everyone in a soft play is accompanying a child (obviously they wouldn't let a lone adult in) the children are playing but not undressed like in a pool or changing room, and you can take photos in public parks of anyone's child you like and they can't do a thing. Softplay is less dodgy than any normal outdoor park and there's no reason parents shouldn't be able to take photos of there kids.

“you could be anyone”

I think YANBU - obviously she’s not wrong but there’s no need to say it like that. I can’t explain why but there is something kind of off and unkind about it. But big for her boots IMO. All the needs to say it ‘I know it’s your child but we have a no photo policy’. The chances of you having some sinister motive are slim so there’s no need to insinuate that there’s a greater chance you do.

She could have been nicer about it an "actually you're not allowed to take videos or pictures in here" would have been sufficient.

We don't have that rule at our play area so I would be taken aback by this

We did have the rule in our old swimming pool there was one parent whose child had been sick for years and wanted to film her first time in a big pool so the manager looked over her shoulder while she did it and we all kept out of shot but that was a special case

It's the rules 🤷🏻‍♀️
There wasn't anyone near your child at the time, but it's very likely there will be during busier times. You needed to know.

@xxxGirlCrushxxx nope didn’t look blank. And yes I know that thanks. I guess I just didn’t think there were any harm in videoing my own child coming down a slide. But we learn something new everyday. Maybe I should stop all the mums and dads in the park that are taking videos/pictures of their children in the future. I guess they are stupid like me too

@spidermummy19

I just thought with him shouting “mummy” they’d know that I’m his mum and not “anyone” But ok, I was in the wrong and I now know not to take pictures of my child in places like play centres

But it's not your child she was concerned with it was the other children using the play centre.

Fred West had children. Ian Huntley worked with children. You ‘could’ be anyone and sadly those who wish to film children or harm them in some way look like regular people. She was just doing her job. Having said that, some sort of notice explaining the rules would have been helpful.

@GreyhoundG1rl the other children that were no where near him?