To not invite people round cos the bastards just won't leave?

[Blahdyblahbla]

I used to enjoy having people over and visiting friends and family at home as I've young dc and restaurants etc just don't work.

But lately people just don't bloody leave. I specifically invite early and say "dc need to be getting ready for bed at 7 so it'll be an early finish" but no fucker leaves. There are talks about leaving in 5 minutes etc, but no one ever does.

I end up having to be either be really rude and saying you have to go now, or dealing with overtired / wired dc and company that just drags on.

I'm really aware of not overstaying my welcome when I go places so find it stressful when others don't.

Do I need to give up on people forever and become a recluse?!

I've seen banners you can hang that say "Welcome! Leave at 9pm!"

I love them.

Haha. Just carry on being blunt - if they don’t like it they should leave earlier, the bastards!

I don't care if it's rude I start with a subtle hint then get blunter

LOL. I'm the same op. My mum comes round early afternoon and I have to practically kick her out at ten. Like F off when the baby goes to bed woman this is my chill time 🤣

YANBU at all. I'm the same. Invite people round for afternoon tea so that they fuck off before dinner and bedtime and they never bloody leave so I end up cooking for everyone. One time I even got DS into his pjyamas and told him to clean his teeth ready for bed and their kids were still running riot around the bedroom with no sign of leaving.

I had a friend like this, subtle hints didn’t work like , I’m just popping upstairs to put the electric blanket on. Eventually both my husband and I separately went upstairs and came down in our pjs. That worked.

Yabu, but only because your visitors don't need to be completely absent for your kids to go bed. We have similar friends, some of them have kids the same age too and we just start getting DS ready for bed. Usually a bit later than normal tbh, but they only left an hour after our DS was in bed after their child had a tantrum because they were really tired.

Not our child, not our problem!

Turn the lights off

What time are you inviting them over for and what for? Is it coffee at 3 or early tea at 5?

With family I would just rope them in to help with bath and bedtime and enjoy a relaxing glass of wine!

My FIL used to go and get people's coats out of the hall cupboard, hand them out and say firmly "there you are, nice to see you, you'll be off now" when he'd had enough. MIL used to say it was embarrassing but I think it was rather excellent!

Apparently whenever Jilly Cooper has parties, she hires an "assistant" for the evening to go around telling everyone "Jilly is very tired, the party is ending now" when she wants everyone to fuck off.

I think it's a fab idea but possibly you can only get away with it if you are her.

Just tidy up around them.and start putting the kids to bed regardless. I never wear a watch so in terrible for leaving at 1am! You would hate me.

Go upstairs for a hour then come down in your Pjs once the kids are asleep?

Alternatively if one of my kids start to cry, my guests tend to run out the house mid cup of tea. Try that?

Always start with- 'so sorry to have to ask you to get off at 7 but we have to get on a zoom call / get ready to go out / DH is expecting a friend over and I've got to get cleared down / I'm expecting a call...' etc etc
Then start the 'final cuppa before you get off half an hour before you need them to'
Get their coats.
Get the hoover out.
Give them a kiss and disappear leaving them to see themselves out.

I hate over-stayers!

I once had to get changed into my pjs and come down to ask people why they were still there to get them to go

YANBU this has happened to me several
times with the same people where DH is actually doing bathtime upstairs for the children and they STILL sit there. Like come the fuck on!

I hear you!

Drives me nuts!

I usually say to people "come at X time for coffee and cake. You'll have to leave at x time as I need to feed ds and get to bed because we are up early for his swimming"

Then about hour before I cook I offer "one last coffee before I start dinner?"

Then after half an hour I say thanks for coming I need to cook dinner now" after 2 minutes I'll start dinner and carry on my evening.

I find that they do tend to leave quite quickly!

The worst was a friend with 2 DDS. She soon had to leave when they were not impressed that ds was eating dinner whilst they "are starving"

Ah and don't give people coffee, it stops them getting tired

I have a friend like this, could come in the afternoon and still be there at 10pm and I literally have to turn the tv and lights off and say I'm going to bed now. Many times I've even fell asleep on the sofa and they're still there! Have to make up excuses all the time when they want to 'pop over for a coffee' because I know it will never be an hour or two! So annoying

Quite!!! I love having people around but please do not overstay your welcome. Bye!

We once told them we were going out, drove to the nearest roundabout, checked they'd gone their way and went back home!!

DBil goes in for a straight "Have you forgotten where the door is?" It works really well, to the extent that most of his visitors now seem pretty well-trained - and don't hold it against him.

...this is why l don't have people around at Christmas

Why do they think l want to be running around after them at 10pm when l've been cooking tidying and entertaining all day?!

@SlugRose

Ah and don't give people coffee, it stops them getting tired

I'm not sure whether this was particularly meant to be funny or not but it really made me laugh!

Depends what your inviting for if for dinner at 6 then leave at 7 then bit rude
If for lunch then different

I say
'I'm sorry but I'm gonna have to kick you out now' and it works :)