To be upset that my mum is buying art off someone like this?

[ManchesterRain]

I am a hobby artist but I do cheap commissions for people too. Basically I enjoy doing it and sometimes make a few quid doing it too. My cousin also dabbles with art but his work is digital, mine is traditional.

Anyway I went to my mums yesterday and she said she had something to show me … she presented a digital portrait of my son which she had paid my cousin to do. I said it was lovely (which it was) but I was secretly a bit hurt that she’s never asked me to create something for her. Anyway she then said “why don’t you ask him to do one for you too??” So I reminded her that I do my own art work 🙄 and her reply is the sting of the tail …

“Yes but you could get a proper one done! They’re only £50 … do you want me to get you one for Christmas?”

I feel really hurt by this! There are people all over Britain with my art in frames on their wall so I know I’m not terrible at what I do!!

AIBU to think she is being really thoughtless?

Baffled that so many have parents that seem to think their skills / achievements aren’t “real”

I grew up with parents that thought my siblings and I were the best thing since sliced bread and utterly golden at everything.

Ans now with my children - ok they are genuinely very strong at sport and academics but in my mind - they’re not just “very strong” they are the most incredible human beings that have ever walked planet earth!

@MamsellMarie

I'm sure someone has said that you don't seem to consider your art real art if you only charge a few quid for them.

I don’t think that is how artists assign value to their work. How much a consumer is willing to pay.

I don’t think that is how artists assign value to their work. How much a consumer is willing to pay.
True but if you don't charge you can be seen by others to be tinkering for enjoyment, not a serious painter. So can't expect others to KNOW you are a good painter if it's not their field.

Your cost should be driven by demand
If the op is charging very little
It’s because that is what her market is willing to pay for it

It doesn’t mean that she won’t think it’s “proper” art. It just means that others have assigned a monetary value to it, that is minimal

Your mum is mean. I’d have pointed it out to her. If my 6 YO had said “but why not let me draw that for you instead?” I’d have said yes. Let alone you being an actual (proper 😉) artist. I’d have been hurt OP and you are not BU. She’s your mum, I don’t care if your art isn’t her style - that’s completely missing the point.

Different tastes.

I get making a stupid tactless comment. I do it all the time. I get that art is in the eye of the beholder. I get that creativity is subjective and less tangible to some. I don’t get not supporting your child in something that is important to them. Having an outlet for creativity is a wonderful thing in whatever form it takes. I always think it is so interesting to see what people I know can produce in whatever medium. I’m with the OP, in thinking it’s hurtful to be closed minded in the way her mother seemed to be. I hope it was just a silly tactless comment, I really do.

I get it op....my art isn't "real" either so i gave up for a bit...starting again now. Everyone elses art is wonderful!
Even the 99% i got in my anatomy exam was because the exam was too easy according to dad!
Anyway as someone upthread commented...she prob has low self worth and sees you as an extension of self so....
She's rude.

@ManchesterRain
I just think it's a little sad that you haven't had a direct conversation with your DM, why do you think this is? Lettings her know that you're upset about her comments & what this is could help?

"why do t you keep it mum? You love it so much and it will be a beautiful picture of your grandson. I can see him every day, so you have the picture"
Then you don't have to look at it, do one for yourself of him to hang up at yours xxxxx

Go on lets see your work!

Drop the 'hobby' from 'Im a hobby artist'... if you produce art, you are an artist. Say to your mum 'sorry, whats NOT proper about my art work? What do you mean by that?' Put her on the spot.

She may be badly wording that she doesn't like your particular style, or she might be being rude and mean, either way it wants calling out, its a horrid thing to say to someone!

For whoever is twatting on about digital art just being downloading something and the app does it all for you - no. I think you might want to do a smidge more research, you are making yourself look pretty stupid.

I work in a variety of different media, including digital (paintshop and clip studio pro mostly) - it is not easy, it isn't cheap, it isn't quick, actually some digital work can take me hours longer than traditional pen and paper work. (It also costs a lot more than £50!)

I know just how you feel op. My dad did something similar to me. I was working as a qualified advisor and he needed some help with something I did regularly . When I offered to help him he said, “I’ll get somebody who knows what they’re talking about.” I have never forgotten. I am sorry your mother did something similar.

* To be upset that my mum is buying art off someone like this?*

What are you actually upset about?
Because in your title it’s about our mum buying art from “someone like this”
But in the op it’s about what she said about you not being a proper artist

The former… yabvu as she can buy what she wants
The latter… yanbu

Her comment about a "proper" one is very insensitive