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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DP ate my food😡

237 replies

heebiejeebies45 · 27/10/2021 18:14

I need to hear people's opinions as I really don't know if my hormones are taking over or not!

Hopefully this isn't a long one but want to add extra info so I don't drip feed.
I had my first baby in May and both baby and I were in hospital for 7 days due to a bad labour (ended up having 3 surgeries, lost 2L of blood, baby got really ill etc.) Over the course of 4/5 weeks I was in and out of the hospital weekly due to all of these issues once discharged. When DP would stay overnight in the hospital with me, he would bring me this chicken and rice box to eat for lunch which was absolutely amazing. I later found out it was a Filipino food stall which served street food in DPs area and there wasn't one near me.

Fast forward to now, I'm currently 14 weeks pregnant with our second baby and the hospital I'm having the baby in is very close to the food place DP would get this rice box from. Whenever I have a hospital appointment (which isn't often) I go to the food stall and buy both of our orders.

Today DP wanted something different and asked for a burrito. When I got home we saw it wasn't actually a burrito and his order was done incorrectly. Even though it wasn't what he ordered, he tried it and liked it so ate all of it. I asked if he wanted some of mine (we usually get the same rice box) and he said yeah so I poured a bit out of my box and put it in his. He then finished his food and came over bothering me for some more of mine. I was jokingly saying, 'go away you've had your own' but let him take a mouthful.

I always get a large and always save half for dinner as I can never finish it all at one time. I put the box down on the table and never thought anything of it. Fast forward a couple of hours and I start getting hungry again so I go to the table to get my rice box but it isn't there. I go into the kitchen and see it on the side, picked it up and it was as light as a feather! Opened it up and there was honestly no more than 2 mouthfuls left in the box.
I had left nearly half! I go over to DP and say 'where the hell is my food, why did you have some, I never said you can have some' etc. He starts saying 'yes you did' then eventually said sorry because he knows he ate it without asking me. I had to go to the front door for fresh air because I was genuinely upset.

I know this is going to sound silly but I really do love that food. I rarely have it as it isn't close to where I live and DP knows I was saving that for dinner. He has form for this too as last time I was pregnant, I put down a container of chow mein near the side of the bed to get a drink, when I looked over, DP had finished all of my chow mein!

I told him to go home (he was going home today anyway but told him to go earlier) I was so pissed off. All a pregnant girl wanted to do was sit down at eat her food for dinner, is that so much to ask?!
Did I overreact or is he just a food thief?

OP posts:
WheelieBinPrincess · 27/10/2021 18:17

You’ve got bigger fish to fry if he’s trying to gaslight you into thinking you told him he could take something when you didn’t.

Mojoj · 27/10/2021 18:17

He's a greedy bastard.

GobletofFiyah · 27/10/2021 18:18

Greedy sod

Chloemol · 27/10/2021 18:19

Send him out for some more, at his expense

Bushkin · 27/10/2021 18:23

Don’t you live together? Send him out for more

Sparkletastic · 27/10/2021 18:23

You've got second child on the way and you don't live together?

And yeah he's selfish and greedy.

RightOnTheEdge · 27/10/2021 18:23

No it's not you OP it's him, you he's a greedy pig.
I've read loads of posts about men like this on MN. What is wrong with them?

Marelle · 27/10/2021 18:25

He’s greedy. Is he fat too? His lack of control around food needs to be addressed because it’s obviously a problem.

DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou · 27/10/2021 18:25

He's a selfish nob, but mn'ers will concentrate on the fact that you aren't living together.

I definitely wouldn't be buying him a rice box next time, that's for sure!

Tiramiwho · 27/10/2021 18:25

Greedy, entitled twat 😠
Ok, first world problems but hell fire, you've recently given birth!
That's something a sibling does- when you are 10!

Glad you sent him home.

AnnListersBlister · 27/10/2021 18:26

He doesn't respect or care for you if you're carrying his child but he would rather he was satiated and you were hungry.

Sleepinghyena · 27/10/2021 18:26

You must have been pregnant agin within 2/3 months of your first being born.... With a man you don't even live with. Who is a greedy thoughtless shit. Good luck with that then!

hotmeatymilk · 27/10/2021 18:27

He’s a greedy wanker. Never take a pregnant woman’s food.

But yes, also: you’re on your second baby together and you don’t live together?

SantasLittleHoHoHo · 27/10/2021 18:27

Against the flow of PP, honestly it doesn't seem like the biggest incident in the world! Yes he ate some of your food that you'd left to save (but you did offer him some previously!) and it's really annoying. He definitely owes you a trip to get some more food! I've done this before and so has my DP.

Being genuinely upset about something like this, to the point you need fresh air, sounds like a slight overreaction. How are you doing in general OP? Are there other issues at play here? To be honest, this alone doesn't seem like a big deal. Is there more to this?

ForeverQuery · 27/10/2021 18:28

Id be fuming

Sleepinghyena · 27/10/2021 18:28

@Marelle Is he fat too?
What has this got to do with anything?

Melawati · 27/10/2021 18:31

You had a baby in May and you’re 14 weeks pregnant now with your second?

Fetarabbit · 27/10/2021 18:31

@WheelieBinPrincess

You’ve got bigger fish to fry if he’s trying to gaslight you into thinking you told him he could take something when you didn’t.
Its not gaslighting ffs, its one of those words that has lost its actual meaning thanks to comments such as this.
Mumofone2021 · 27/10/2021 18:32

When you’re pregnant, and craving food then nothing is unreasonable! I broke down in morrisons once when 20 weeks pregnant as they’d sold out of crispy seaweed. Also my best friends finest moment was when she was 18 weeks pregnant and slapped my ex partner in the face for eating the last packet of quavers in their house. He was a twat so fully deserved it.

heebiejeebies45 · 27/10/2021 18:36

He's a selfish nob, but mn'ers will concentrate on the fact that you aren't living together.

You didn't lie there😂 @DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou I forgot people like to pick up on things that have nothing to do with the post!

You must have been pregnant agin within 2/3 months of your first being born.... With a man you don't even live with. Who is a greedy thoughtless shit. Good luck with that then!

@Sleepinghyena sorry is there some sort of handbook that says you have to live together when having kids? DD and I have only just moved in to our new flat at the end of July. DP lives 40 mins away and stays over 4/5 out of 7 days. We have a lot of support from close family so it works for us

OP posts:
RealBecca · 27/10/2021 18:36

Id def have sent him to get more there and then at his own expense.

My partner used to eat more than his share then half heartendly offered to get more. Once i said yes, go now. He did and he didnt do it again.

EnjoyingTheArmoire · 27/10/2021 18:37

Totally off topic, but you really shouldn't be leaving cooked rice out on the side, it's quite risky if it's not cooled and heated properly.

The last thing you need is rice related food poisoning, especially as you're pregnant.

AmDillDandin · 27/10/2021 18:37

@DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou I forgot people like to pick up on things that have nothing to do with the post!

Give over, you crowbarred it in Grin

felulageller · 27/10/2021 18:38

He's an arse and you have much bigger problems.

Why have 2dcs with someone you don't live with?

Penistoe · 27/10/2021 18:38

You got pregnant within weeks while in and out of hospital still, with a man you don’t live with.