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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Thank god we don’t live in Sweden. AIBU?

825 replies

sw1v · 27/10/2021 14:40

I was just reading in another thread that in Sweden, you are basically forced to send your babies into day care settings at the age of 1. Apparently 50% of 1 year olds are in full- time nurseries (very long days inc. parents’ commutes) and 95% by the time they are 2! Plus (unlike in the U.K.) there is apparently no minimum ratio for staff to children.

But what if you are a mother who simply doesn’t want to do this (or father)? I personally, would hate this. So how is it acceptable for ‘the state’ to be interfering in people’s personal spheres and family lives by making this ‘the societal norm.’ Is it because they are a high tax society and want more tax? Is this it? Well, it seems like an infringement on personal liberties to me (without wanting to sound too dramatic).

AIBU?

OP posts:
DressedUpAtAnIvy · 27/10/2021 14:42

Where did you read this, Xenophobia Today?

SheWoreYellow · 27/10/2021 14:43

I can’t find anything by googling.

TheExtraGuineaPig · 27/10/2021 14:44

If they're trying to force babies in but have only managed 50% then they're not very good at it are they?

NatriumChloride · 27/10/2021 14:45

@DressedUpAtAnIvy

Where did you read this, Xenophobia Today?
😂😂
zealouslemur · 27/10/2021 14:46

'basically forced'
'50% of 1 year olds'

Hmm Massive contradiction...

MrsTerryPratchett · 27/10/2021 14:46

Yes Sweden forces people to put their children in nurseries at one. Also, Holland makes people eat waffles and the Italians have opera as an A level.

Societal norms aren't 'forcing'.

Apart from anything we should be copying them because they're delightful people.

TeenMinusTests · 27/10/2021 14:46

You should listen to the Radio 4 series 'The Cold Swedish Winter'.
iirc that topic is covered there.

Cultural differences.

SparrowNest · 27/10/2021 14:46

If you want to get angry at something, have a look at Denmark where daycare is genuinely compulsory from age 1 for migrant children living in deprived areas. For indoctrination purposes, by a state that basically hates them.

www.nytimes.com/2018/07/01/world/europe/denmark-immigrant-ghettos.html

GnomeOrMistAndIceGuy · 27/10/2021 14:47

Are you planning on moving to Sweden? If not, I'm not sure you need to worry that much about it. Any other cultures you'd like to peer in on and slag off?

sw1v · 27/10/2021 14:47

Somebody on another thread just quoted these stats today.

OP posts:
HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 27/10/2021 14:47

Do you believe everything you read on the internet is real Hmm

Hemskis · 27/10/2021 14:47

I'm Swedish and this is not true. Childcare is good quality and subsidied by the government to enable you to work. If you are unemployed you are entitled to a certain number of hours. Nursery hours are restricted to your work hours so you can't pay extra to have some free time.
Childcare staff are well educated. Parental leave is excellent and often shared by both parents and children generally don't attend nursery when younger than a year.

You can be a stay at home mum if you like, noone will stop you, but it's not a common choice.

Chewieboora · 27/10/2021 14:48
Confused

Will someone think of the children Shock

Oh...

ILoveMyMonkey · 27/10/2021 14:48

It’s not mandatory, it’s a choice you have.

It enables women (and men) to have a choice about returning to work by providing affordable nursery choices - something not available to all here in the UK.

They also provide 480 days of paid parental leave when a baby is born - that’s an amazing amount of time - and a large proportion of that is on 80% of their salary.

Westfacing · 27/10/2021 14:49

Such nonsense.

I was a frequent visitor to Sweden but haven't been for about 15 years - I do remember that there was excellent childcare provision.

Surely no one is forced to send a child to childcare but it's there if you need it so you can return to work.

BurntO · 27/10/2021 14:49

Please do your own research before starting such threads OP 🤦🏼‍♀️

SarahBellam · 27/10/2021 14:49

Did somebody on Facebook tell you that?

BiscuitLover09876 · 27/10/2021 14:50

This is very confusing. Who's forcing them op?

Isn't the point that childcare is generally better and more affordable so more people want to use it? Also I feel like the numbers could even be higher in the UK?

Cranncat · 27/10/2021 14:50

Don't be silly, OP. Does it not strike you as at all possible that Swedish women are choosing to work after having children in such large numbers because of the state-subsidised, very high-quality childcare available?

ILoveMyMonkey · 27/10/2021 14:50

Somebody on another thread just quoted these stats today.
Maybe don’t believe everything you read on mumsnet - have you heard of google?!

SummerHouse · 27/10/2021 14:51

It all sounds a bit unlikely.

ImUninsultable · 27/10/2021 14:51

Sweden is a great model and they're some of the happiest people in the world.

They arent forced to put their kids into nursery. They choose to, because it is affordable and allows them to work if it is what they want.

How often do you hear, "I want to go back to work buy we cant afford the childcare" in this country?

We could do a hell of a lot worse than following Sweden here.

Animood · 27/10/2021 14:51

[quote SparrowNest]If you want to get angry at something, have a look at Denmark where daycare is genuinely compulsory from age 1 for migrant children living in deprived areas. For indoctrination purposes, by a state that basically hates them.

www.nytimes.com/2018/07/01/world/europe/denmark-immigrant-ghettos.html[/quote]
Behind a pay wall. Can you copy and paste I. Here? Looks like an interesting read

Cocomarine · 27/10/2021 14:51

Does the IKEA café sell Swedish egg-on-your-face?

One plate for OP, please! 🤣

Starcaller · 27/10/2021 14:51

Maybe check things before regurgitating what you read everywhere? Do you always repeat things as fact without doing any due diligence of your own? Confused

I highly doubt anyone is forced. More like childcare provision is so good and affordable plenty of people are able and choose to use it and can afford to use it and go back to work.